


I Hate How Much I Love You

by FantasyScribe



Series: I Hate How Much I Love You [1]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Best Friends, F/F, F/M, Friends With Benefits, M/M, Pining, boyf riends — Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-11-16
Packaged: 2019-01-22 20:14:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 46,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12489932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FantasyScribe/pseuds/FantasyScribe
Summary: Jeremy Heere has been Michael Mell's best friend for as long as he can remember. He knows that he would do anything for the guy he loves as a friend, and as something more. He just didn't know how far he would be willing to go for his friend when Michael starts to have his own unrequited feelings for someone else. This fic was inspired by pondify's (boyf) riends with benefits series (I highly recommend it)!





	1. The Beginning of the End

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [a crimson headache, aching blush](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12142110) by [pondify](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pondify/pseuds/pondify). 



It was a rainy wintry Saturday morning in Red Bank, New Jersey. It was the kind of day that most people would not get out of bed for.  It was the kind of day that one would sit in their favorite arm chair with a warm mug of hot chocolate and curl up to read their favorite book. This was the day that seventeen-year-old Christine Canigula found herself in her favorite pair of sweatpants and extra-large drama camp t-shirt. She was currently curled up into the corner of her couch in front of a space heater. She was reading the newest script that her drama teacher, Mr. Reyes, had handed out that Friday. The play this time was _Romeo and Juliet_ with a sci-fi spin to it. While Christine could appreciate creativity and improv exhibited by her peers and mentors, she was having a very difficult time trying to get through the Capulitian Empire’s dispute with the Montagiun Galactic Fleet. Not only that, but she was having an even harder time imagining Juliet (or “Julorg”) with six tentacles and four eyes and Romeo’s (or “Romeblorg’s”) extra head. She had to admit, Mr. Reyes had definitely gone out of the box with this one, though she felt that the play of the previous year involving a psycho high-tech pill, that apparently looked like Keanu Reeves, taking over the entire student body with Mountain Dew as an energy source was as out of the box as you could get. 

                Christine put the packet of papers down and reached over to grab her cup of green tea. Most of her friends would disagree with her choice of drink, choosing to settle with a mug of hot chocolate. Christine, however, felt that tea was seriously under appreciated by most of her peers, at least the ones that she hung around as of late. She tried to explain the health benefits and overall feeling of contentment that came with drinking a nice hot cup of tea, but she was met with nothing but derision and disinterest. Chloe had rolled her eyes, Brooke had given a small giggle and avoided eye contact, Jenna had been on another planet with her eyes glued to her phone, Rich had replied with a “Lame! Hot chocolate ALL the way!”, Jake had shrugged and had proceeded to challenge Rich to an arm wrestling match, and Jeremy and Michael remained neutral on the matter with mimicked shrugs and polite smiles. She had eventually given up on enlightening them and continued to eat her lunch.

                Christine paused in her thought process and thought about the latter mentioned. Jeremy and Michael had been best friends long before she had met either one of them. She liked to think that she knew them both pretty well considering their group was now a little over a year old when it came to them all being friends. However, she did understand that no matter how well she thought she knew them, she had realized early on that she would never know them as well as they knew each other.

                Jeremy and Michael were going on thirteen years of friendship. That is a lot of time to get to know someone, especially if that had been your only friend since preschool. Christine began to notice various little things about the two that she found both endearing and slightly abnormal.

                Jeremy would bring an extra lunch everyday just in case Michael would forget to bring his lunch or forget to eat all together.  When Jeremy did not get the main male lead in their city theater group during the summer Michael held Jeremy’s hand for a week straight after the rejection.  Ever since the SQUIP incident Michael now carried bottles of Mountain Dew Red in his backpack everywhere he and Jeremy went. Every time they met up in the morning they hugged, every time they said goodbye at the end of the day they hugged, and those were the days they were not going to one another’s houses. Sure, they would spend time with everyone else, but they continued to remain as close as they had always been even before the SQUIP, if not closer. Christine rarely saw Jeremy without Michael and she rarely saw Michael without Jeremy.

 If she was being honest, Christine would admit that Jeremy’s bond with his best friend was part of the reason she ended their month-long relationship. It wasn’t that Jeremy neglected her for Michael or ditched her at any time while they were dating. She just felt like a third wheel every time Michael was around. Goodness… even when he wasn’t around she still felt like that. Jeremy and she would be at her house or his watching a movie or eating out and a text would pop up on Jeremy’s phone. Christine knew it was from Michael by the way Jeremy’s face would light up. She had never gotten that look to appear on his face before.

Christine loved Jeremy, but not in the way that she would have hoped at the beginning of their relationship. She saw him as a brother and nothing more. It was a tough pill to swallow when they had first talked about their feelings towards one another together, especially considering the lengths Jeremy had gone to, what with the SQUIP and everything. It was a relief to know that he felt the same as her. It was a clean break-up that left a bittersweet feeling at the end, but it was for the best for them both.

Christine finished off her tea and put aside the cup to continue with her script reading. She had not gotten too far into it when she heard the doorbell ring. Confused, she put aside the papers and made her way to the door. Her parents were currently working and she had not made plans to hang out with any of her friends. The person on the other side began to knock on the door in a hurried manner. Christine made it to the door and stood on her tip toes to look through the peep hole. She widened her eyes slightly when she saw a soaking wet Jeremy Heere waiting outside.

Quickly, she unlocked the door and opened it wide in an unspoken invitation for her friend to come inside out of the down pour. Jeremy took the hint and walked past her into the warm, dry house.  Christine shut the door behind him and locked the door afterwards. Once she turned around to face the drenched boy, she was engulfed in a tight hug by said boy. She could feel how ice cold his skin felt, and the way his clothes stuck to his body when she put her arms around him.

“Jeremy! You’re freezing! Come on in the living room and I’ll let you borrow some of my dad’s clothes. He shouldn’t mind…,” her voice drifted off and she heard a broken sob come from the top of her head.

                She let him cry and hold on to her for a few more minutes before she spoke again. “Jer... what’s wrong?” she asked quietly. He sniffled a few times before answering. “I can’t take it anymore Chris…,” he said in a hushed tone that she almost missed what he had said, “I can’t keep doing this…”.

“What are you talking about? What can’t you not do anymore?” the petite girl asked in confusion. She had never seen Jeremy this upset before.

                He finally released his hold on her and took a step back and met her eyes. What she saw there was awful. His light blue eyes were red from crying too long. Underneath them he had dark shadows that showed that he hadn’t gotten to sleep in a long time. His skin, while usually pale, now looked sickly white, which further emphasized the gauntness of his face and the purple bags under his eyes. The worst was the deep sadness that was in his glazed over eyes.

                “Oh Jer… what happened? You look terrible!” Normally she would have found a nicer word, but there was no denying how emaciated he appeared.

                Jeremy apparently didn’t take offense to her choice of wording as he began to tear up again before exclaiming in a loud voice, “I can’t keep doing this… I can’t keep sleeping with Michael!”

                Christine felt her heart drop.

 

               


	2. Who I Love the Most

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy and Michael fluff, and Jeremy gets 'flustered'.

Christine felt her heart drop.

She was in shock. Surely this hadn’t been going on that long. Surely not.

She knew the boys were close. Closer than close even. But to sleep together? As in have sex? No.

 There was that rumor that had started that they were both dating (*cough* Rich *cough*), but she knew that wasn’t true once Christine had started to date Jeremy. She hadn’t put much stock in what other people said about the boys’ relationship before, not being the type to listen to rumors in the first place. But once she began dating Jeremy she had seen with her own eyes that what they both had was a special friendship, but not a sexual one.

Christine finally found herself again and looked at Jeremy with wide eyes. He was crying hysterically in front of her and looked ready to collapse at any moment.

“Jeremy, let’s get you cleaned up and warm, okay? Then we will talk about this,” She said as she put her hand on the arm that was not currently wiping the tears that fell down his face. He sobbed and nodded as she led him by his navy-blue cardigan sleeve to the guest bathroom. She had Jeremy sit on the toilet as she warmed up the shower and went in search of some of her dad’s baggier clothes that she knew would fit Jeremy. Once she got back she put the clothes on the sink and adjusted the water to a more lukewarm temperature.

“Alright, the water is ready and I have some of my dad’s clothes here on the sink counter for you. The towels are underneath the sink,” she said as she opened the bottom cabinet where the towels and washcloths were stored. He had calmed down a little bit and gave a nod. Christine then left the bathroom and closed the door behind her.

She went to the kitchen and began to make a couple of mugs of hot chocolate for herself and Jeremy. Christine did her best not to think too much as she went about her task and listening to the shower down the hallway. By the time Jeremy emerged from the bathroom she had two hot chocolates with extra marshmallows waiting in the living room by the blasting space heater.

He still looked worse for wear, but now looked dry and warm as he sat down on the couch beside her. She handed the mug over to him and he took the mug with a small smile of thanks that quickly fell as he grasped the hot mug in his hands.

She waited till he took a sip before starting what was sure to be a long conversation.

“So… what is going on Jeremy? I didn’t think you and Michael ever had that kind of relationship. I know there were rumors but I thought that was all they were, were rumors,” she said in a confused tone. The thought of Jeremy and Michael being together romantically wouldn’t have been such a shock if they both hadn’t denied it so vehemently in the past. It had crossed Christine’s mind a few times, but she never had solid evidence, until now at least.

Jeremy sighed and looked down into his hot chocolate.

“W-well, I guess it is better to start at the beginning…”

**3 Months Ago**

Jeremy and Michael were currently playing Apocalypse of the Damned again. They had already beaten it together earlier that year and were currently trying to beat their record on how long it took to beat it again. The record was currently 2 months and 3 days, and it would have taken a shorter amount of time the first time if it wasn’t for a certain megalomaniac microchip that resembled a young Keanu Reeves.

                They were both sitting in their respective bean bag chairs: Michael on the left and Jeremy on the right. They had just beaten level 9, which had taken them 2 days to beat, and were currently celebrating with Pepsi Wild Bunch, OK Soda, and an assortment of salty snacks and candy.

“Man! I never thought it would take 48 hours to beat that level, especially since it was like our millionth time to play it!” Michael groaned as he stuffed a bunch of pretzels into his mouth.

“Yeah, I know what you mean…,” Jeremy agreed. He was currently trying to cover up an obvious erection that had begun after hearing his friend groan.

 Who was he kidding. It had started as soon as he set food in Michael’s basement with Michael. Being near your crush in an isolated dimly lit room sucked hard. Jeremy almost groaned himself as he thought about what he wished he could “suck hard.”

“Hey, are you okay, you don’t look so good?” Jeremy looked up to see Michael looking up, concern etched on his face. Jeremy forced himself to ignore the fact how handsome Michael’s face looked against the TV screen light. He was trying to ignore the fact how his friend’s eyes looked like twin liquid pools of chocolate. Or how askew his black hair looked and how it made Jeremy wonder if that was how it would look after sex, or at least a heavy make out session.

Jeremy let himself swallow down the saliva accumulation that was currently making its way out of his mouth. He refused to let Michael see him drool while Jeremy was checking him out.

He realized that Michael was still waiting for him to answer, and each second that went unanswered caused his brow to furrow more and more.

Before Jeremy could belatedly reply, Michael asked in a concerned tone, “It isn’t the SQUIP again is it? Because if it is then I have a bunch of Mountain Dew Red’s in my fridge man! Because, you know I’ve got your back, right buddy? There is no way I’ll let that Keanu Reeves motherfu…,” Jeremy knew when Michael was about to go on one of his tangents, it was cute most of the time when it was about music or vintage videogames, but not when it came to this topic.

“Michael,” Jeremy interrupted, “It isn’t the…i-it isn’t ‘him’. I just have a lot on my mind right now. Y-you know, school work and getting ready for the play Mr. Reyes is writing is just stressing me out. And I finally get to h-hang out with you one on one. I love our friends and everything, but I’ve missed spending time with you,” he internally flinched at his stuttering. Why would Michael believe him? He didn’t even believe himself!

“Oh, okay! Well, it’ll be okay. I mean we are seniors now and we don’t have a lot of free time like we used to. If you ever need help with homework or rehearsing lines let me know. Well, I probably can’t help you with that suck-ass AP Calculus class you signed up for, for whatever reason! But I can help with anything else!” Michael gave one of his big 1000-megawatt smile that made Jeremy weak at the knees. He was thankful that he was currently sitting down.

Jeremy felt his insides turn into mush at Michael’s encouragement as he returned the smile. Michael really was the best. He was the best. And Jeremy just wasn’t. Jeremy brainwashed all his classmates, he was responsible for the death of Eminem, he emotionally damaged his best friend of 12 years. And for what? So, he could try to impress a girl and only date her for a month? Sure, he had gotten some amazing friends in the end, but he wondered if it was even worth the pain he had caused the guy who had stuck with him before the popularity and the play.

They both had a long talk while he was still in the hospital. They talked about their feelings and moments that had been missed while he was busy being a douche bag. In the end, Michael forgave him even though he didn’t deserve it. He had didn’t care for himself when he was a loser at the bottom rung of the high school hierarchy, but after what he had caused, he could now say that he utterly despised himself.

Jeremy pushed his self-loathing to the back of his mind and decided to save it for one of the nights he laid in bed hating on himself.

“Thanks man.”

“So, I believe that the question needs to be asked since we have all these new friends. Am I still your ‘favewite person?’” Michael asked as he scooted up closer to Jeremy. Jeremy felt his heart rate increase rapidly as Michael put his arm around him and pressed their cheeks together.

Jeremy gulped down some more saliva and playfully pushed his best friend away. He was glad the lights were dim and Michael couldn’t see the deep red blushed that he knew was quickly spreading across his face.

“Yeah, you know you will always will be, _and you’ll also be the one I love the most_ ,” Jeremy thought the last to himself as he shot a playful smile to his friend, who gave him a soft smile in return. Jeremy decided to change the mood before he did something rash, like kiss his best friend.

“But, Rich is coming up as a close second, so you might want to watch your back,” Jeremy said in a false serious tone as he brought his attention back to the TV. Michael gave a mocking gasp and slid back over to his beanbag to Jeremy’s relief.

“Wow, I thought Chris was my competition. Rich is a real dark horse in who wins the title for ‘Favewite Person of Jeremiah Heere’ huh?” Michael said in a contemplating tone.

“I know dude, who knew right?”

They both turned to look at each other seriously. Jeremy was the first to give in and began to laugh, Michael followed close behind.

As they both sat there in Michael’s basement, laughing and playing vintage print games, Jeremy couldn’t think of a single place that he would rather be than by the side of the boy he loved.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, Michael is Jeremy's 'favwit person'. I have 4 chapters typed up right now, all of which except one are on my tumblr, thefantasyqueen. I just want to reread some of the chapters to check for errors. Thanks to all who are reading my stuff!


	3. Longing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy feels nostalgic.

 

                Jeremy wasn’t for sure when he started to fall in love with Michael. The more he had thought about it, the more he realized that it probably began when they were about seven. The other kids had learned early on that Jeremy was an easy targeted loser. He was shorter than the rest of the kids back then, and was easily under the BMI scale that the school made them weigh in for every year when they checked for scoliosis and color blindness. Good news, he wasn’t color blind. Bad news, his small stature made him the type that the other kids instinctively knew as being a weak loser.

He remembered a few of the kids push him down and start to kick dirt on him for fun. Jeremy was pretty sure that at least one of them was a girl…how sad is that? All he knows is that one minute he is on the ground crying pitifully with dirt being piled on him, and the next second he hears another voice rise against the taunting. Looking up, he sees a kid in faded blue jeans and a ratty red jacket with a gray t-shirt. The sun glistens on his dark-rimmed glasses as he glared at the other kids who began to back away slowly. Seven-year-old Michael had been taller and huskier than the rest, leading to their peers being intimidated of the young Philippino boy.

                “What is wrong with you guys?! I’m going to tell the teacher if you don’t leave Jeremy alone!”

The bullies that he can’t even remember the names of ran off. This left Jeremy and Michael alone for the time being. Michael turned around and stretched out a hand for him to take.

                “Are you okay Jer?”

Jeremy believes that was the point he began to love Michael Mell. The sun behind him gave Michael a heavenly glow, and his bigger stature made Jeremy feel safe and protected.  Jeremy remembers taking that hand and wanting to never let go. Though he had, hadn’t he? Years later he chose to completely kick Michael out of his life despite how he was his favorite person. Despite that Michael had been there with him through his parent’s divorce. Despite how he would hug Jeremy when he had a nightmare when they were younger during a sleepover. Despite how Michael had always been there for him, and he had turned around and ran when Michael needed him the most. He had even rubbed salt in the wound by calling him a “loser” before running off.

He didn’t deserve Michael’s love. Jeremy didn’t deserve anyone’s love. Hell... he couldn’t even love himself. How pathetic was that? He was pathetic, unlovable. The SQUIP had been wrong about a lot of things, but it had gotten some things right. Everything about him was terrible. And yes, everything he had done with the SQUIP and before then made him want to die. He was clueless, oblivious and selfish. He hadn’t talked to anyone, even Michael about these feelings. They would only deny it all, say none of that was true, but Jeremy knew better.

Jeremy didn’t even know he was in love with Michael until the play, ironically enough. As disastrous as that moment had been and as terrible as he had treated his best friend, he managed to be filled with positive emotion as he saw Michael run onto the stage.

Time seemed to slow as the lights had poured onto Michael’s head. It reminded him of back when Michael had saved him from those bullies. The glow and the outstretched hand (with Mountain Dew Red this time) made Jeremy identify the emotion that he couldn’t have possibly have known when he was just a seven-year-old kid. He realized he was in love with his best friend, and had been for a long time.

Everything had worked out and the SQUIP was vanquished. He made up with Michael and things went back to normal, except their group of friends had expanded from two to eight. He had even begun dating the girl of his dreams, or who he thought had been the girl of his dreams.

Christine Canigula was wonderful. She was smart, cute, funny, quirky, and so many other things that it would take him days to list them all. Everything about her was pure and amazing, but he could not see her romantically. The more he began to spend time with her the more he saw her as a sister, or a really close relative. It had been one of the most awkward moment of Jeremy’s life (and he had a lot of those) when they had kissed for the first time. He had wanted to wipe his mouth off as soon as it was over. Not that it was bad. It was sweet and soft, but it felt like he had just kissed the sister that he had never had the chance to have. Thankfully, Christine had felt the exact same and they remained close friends, after having a non-dramatic, mutual break-up.

After realizing his feelings for Michael, Jeremy went through a phase of denial. He had thought that he had been straight for 17-years of his life. He didn’t believe being gay, bisexual, or anything else was wrong really, but he just didn’t think that he had been any of those identifiers. It was hard to wrap his mind around it all.

So, he decided that maybe dating the girl that he had caused so much chaos over would cause him to get over his feelings for Michael. Newsflash! It didn’t. It made it so much more worse on him.

Every time Jeremy was with Christine he thought about Michael. What was Michael doing at that moment? That shirt would look good on Michael. That patch would look good on Michael’s hoodie. Michael loves this song. Michael, Michael, Michael…

Jeremy thought about him all the time even when he wasn’t with Christine. He would think about him in class, when he was eating, before he went to bed, when he woke up, even when he masturbated. The first time he masturbated to thoughts of Michael he had felt incredibly guilty. He hadn’t even thought of Christine that way even when he thought that he had been in love with her. Shockingly, for a chronic masturbator such as himself, he felt that Christine had been too pure, too refined in his eyes to do something as dirty as jack off to thoughts of her. He now realized he had set her on a pedestal. Saw her as someone who was comfortable in their own skin, and that was all he wanted, was to feel good in his own skin. He had idolized her, he never loved her.

Somehow, Michael was an exception to that rule.  In his fantasies, Michael was gentle and caring. When Jeremy thought of them being together he didn’t think about it with lust, but with love. When Michael and Jeremy were tangled together in the basement hangout or either of their rooms with their parents away, it was love-making, not sex.

 The Michael his imagination loved him and didn’t mind telling him so as he caressed and kissed Jeremy all over. He held Jeremy like he was fragile and that he was worth something. Michael called out his name tenderly and nuzzled his neck gently. Michael took things slow and never rushed because every moment they shared like this was something special. Michael wanted Jeremy and held him tightly like he didn’t want to let go. Michael loved him and that was enough.

After he reached climax he was left with feelings of longing. He longed for his day dreams to be real. Then he would remember that he didn’t deserve that reality. Jeremy didn’t deserve Michael or his nonexistent feelings of love. Then Jeremy would push back his thoughts until the next time he was feeling weak and wanted to get off on thoughts of Michael loving him, which would be the following morning more than likely.

Jeremy spent a majority of his time around Michael trying to keep his feelings from boiling over. Trying not to hold his hand, not kiss him when his face got a little too close, not hug him every time he saw Michael. It got harder and harder as the days passed.

It all came to a head when the day came when Michael confessed a big secret to Jeremy. They were currently in Jeremy’s kitchen heating up some day-old pizza they had ordered the night before.

“Hey buddy, do you mind if I tell you something? It is something serious that I haven’t talked to anyone else about yet. I thought that I should tell you first since you are my best friend after all,” Michael looked uncomfortable and kept darting his dark eyes away from Jeremy’s light blue ones.

“Sure dude. You know you can tell me anything,” Jeremy replied with an encouraging smile.

Michael took this as the go ahead and took a deep breath before exclaiming, “OkayIknowthisisgoingtobeashockbutIamgayandIhaveacrushandIjustreallywantedyoutoknowbecausewearebestbudsandIcan’tkeepquietanymore!”

Jeremy blinked, “Uh, man I have no idea what you just said. Just take a deep breath and talk slowly.”

Jeremy walked over to his flustered friend and took placed his hands in his own and gave a comforting squeeze. Michael looked up and took another deep breath.

“Okay, I said that I know this is going to shock you, but I just want to be honest with you and myself. I’m gay Jer. I had my suspicions for a while now but I wasn’t sure until now. You see, I have a crush.”

Jeremy felt his heart shatter into a million pieces. He was confident that is what happened because his he couldn’t breathe. He heard the timer on the oven go off letting them know the pizza was done. Michael let go of his limp hands and went to turn the timer off.

“I understand if you feel uncomfortable being around me now that you know. I can leave, it’s no big deal, really,” he could hear the pain and disappointment in Michael’s voice.

Oh no… he thought Jeremy was upset that he was gay! Jeremy swung around to stop Michael from leaving the kitchen.

“Wait up!” he grabbed Michael’s arm and turned him around to where he was facing Jeremy again. Oh no it looked like he was about to cry. Jeremy knows he sure did want to, but not for the reasons Michael would think.

“Michael, I don’t have a problem with you being gay. It’s okay! I just came to terms with the fact that I’m bi, so really, you’re fine! Hell! I’m happy for you!” Jeremy declared. Michael finally looked him in eyes then, clearly surprised.

“Dude, you never told me.”

“Sorry, I haven’t told anyone. I just realized it for myself not that long ago,” Jeremy said sheepishly. “But you said you had a crush… who is the lucky guy?” It took everything Jeremy had not to collapse into tears right there and then. His chest, his heart hurt so bad. Michael had never had a crush before, or any that Jeremy knew of. Sure, Jeremy had talked Michael’s ears off about his crushes, especially about Christine. But Michael had never expressed interest in anyone before now.

                He owed Michael this, and he couldn’t let his own feelings get in the way. He was tired of being petty, selfish Jeremy, he wanted to be a better friend to Michael. He had to be. From now on he was going to be there for Michael just like Michael had been there for him in the past. Jeremy would do anything for Michael from now on no matter what.

                He just didn’t know how far he was willing to go at that moment.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Jer... I love little Michael and Jeremy! We will probably see them again.


	4. It Started with a Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things start to get interesting in the life of Jeremy Heere.

 

                It turns out that Michael’s ‘lucky guy’ was Dustin Kropp, one of Jake and Rich’s jock friends.

                Dustin played all sorts of sports for a variety of school sports teams. He was the team captain of the soccer team, Jake’s co-captain on the basketball team, he ran cross country, and played as catcher for the baseball team.  He was also smart, being a member of the debate team, Beta club, and the National Honors Society. Jeremy wondered if he had time to sleep.

                Not only was Dustin Kropp athletic and smart, but he was good-looking. Being bisexual, Jeremy could admire girls and boys, and he could, unfortunately, see the appeal in Dustin. He had short honey blond hair, dark blue eyes, and a body that most of the guys in school would kill for. He towered over almost everyone except Jake, being a whole 6’ 3”.

                Before the whole SQUIP thing happened, Dustin had not been one of Jeremy or Michael’s tormentors. That honor had gone to primarily Rich and a couple of other dumb jocks. Jeremy guesses that he and Michael were just too underneath his radar to have received notice. Dustin was Jake’s level of popular, everyone knew who Dustin Kropp was, females and males alike.

                Jeremy had been kind of disappointed when he learned Dustin was Michael’s crush. It was a little too cliché, but now that Jeremy had promised to support Michael no matter what he wasn’t about to say anything negative. If anything, this helped stomp out any remaining hope that Jeremy had of Michael ever having feelings for him. He was as far from being someone like Dustin Kropp as you could get. Lanky body, brown curly hair, pale blue eyes, anxiety, self-loathing, and he could go on and on how he was not like Dustin Kropp.

                Jeremy couldn’t hate him. He had tried and failed when he saw him be nothing but nice to everyone around him no matter what social group they were in. Hell. Dustin had even tracked Jeremy down in the hallway one day because a paper had flown out of his bag and he wanted to give it back to him. He was twice the person Jeremy was and then some. That didn’t stop Jeremy from being jealous of him, however. He still felt bitterness and disappointment boil underneath his skin as Michael began to gush about all things Dustin Kropp.

                “Jer! Did you see?! He put gel in his hair today! How hot is that?”

                “Jeremy, I think we made eye contact today. His eyes are just gorgeous, don’t you think?”

                “Dustin said the funniest thing in English today!”

                Dustin, Dustin, Dustin, that was all he heard about now when he was with Michael, and each time he felt his heart gain a new hole. Since admitting he was bi, Michael had taken it into his head that they could gush about guys together. It hurt that he couldn’t gush about the guy he truly wanted to be with. But he had to remember that this wasn’t about him, it was about supporting Michael. So, when Michael talked about how Dustin Kropp’s smile lit up an entire room, Jeremy hastily agreed and gave a responding compliment that sounded false even to his own ears.

                Right now, he was currently on his computer looking at Rich’s latest Vine video that featured Jake and a few other of their mutual friends. Dustin Kropp, thank goodness, was not in it. He had had enough of Dustin Kropp for a while after hearing about him all week.

                He was chuckling over a Vine where Rich was balanced on Jake’s shoulders and they were attempting to do a slam dunk on Jake’s outdoor basketball court. This resulted in Rich losing his balance, and them both falling over with their friends leaping towards them to catch Rich out of thin air. He was about to click on another link when he heard the doorbell ring. He got up and made his way to the door.

                Once he opened the door, he found a mopey Michael Mell at the door. His bottom lip was jutted out in a cute pout that made Jeremy want to kiss it away. Michael’s shoulders were droop down and his dark brown eyes were glassy as if he was about to cry.

                “Hey man, what’s wrong?” Jeremy hated it when Michael looked like he was about to cry. Probably because Michael never cried, and if he did it was rare. Jeremy had always been the crier of the pair, not Michael.

                Michael walked inside and Jeremy opened the door wide to let him in. Michael didn’t say anything as he walked up the stairs to Jeremy’s room. Jeremy followed close behind. When they got to the room Jeremy closed the door behind them and sat on the bed beside Michael.

                “Dude, you’re freaking me out. What’s up?” Jeremy asked as he put his right hand on Michael’s shoulder while his left was squeezing the life out of his dark blue comforter at being so close in proximity to Michael in _his_ bedroom. With the door closed, them alone in the house, no dad to walk in on them.

                _No Jeremy! Bad Jeremy! You need to support Michael right now, not get caught up in your hormones!_

Jeremy willed his growing erection down. His mind flashed to Rich in a speedo during one of Chloe’s swimming parties and his libido instantly diminished.

                “Come on. Can you please talk to me? I won’t know what’s wrong if you don’t tell me. Why do you look like you’re about to cry? Mikey?” Jeremy knew that one of Michael’s weaknesses was when someone he cared about called him Mikey. It turned the boy into a ball of goop. Normally, it was a fun way to make Michael blush cutely, but now it was said to get his buddy to start talking again.

                Michael looked up into Jeremy’s eyes and sniffled, “Dustin…Dustin…has a girlfriend.”

                Jeremy felt relief, and then mentally smacked himself. He had to quit being so selfish. Michael was seriously hurting.

                “Oh… I’m sorry man. I don’t know what to say,” Jeremy patted Michael’s shoulder sympathetically.

                “It’s okay. I should have known not to get my hopes up anyway. I didn’t even know if he was even interested in guys or not. How pathetic is that? I mean it isn’t that big of a surprise. He doesn’t really give off that vibe anyway,” Michael said hoarsely. Jeremy saw the tears in Michael’s eyes start to spill over onto his face. Jeremy felt his heart ache for Michael. He knew what it felt like to feel hopeless when you knew the person you liked would never like you back.

                “Oh Mikey. You’re not pathetic. Don’t feel bad for liking someone. Dustin seems nice, I bet he would have been flattered if he knew that someone as great as you liked him,” Jeremy knew that he would if he was in Dustin’s position, which he never would be.

                “Thanks Jer. That means a lot,” Michael said, giving a wet smile.

                To be honest Jeremy feels that after a certain point when it comes to unrequited feelings, they either fizzle out over time or boil over when given the chance to act. Jeremy’s feelings knew that this was the perfect opportunity to boil over. One minute, Michael is wiping tears and snot off his face and the next Jeremy’s lips connect with his.

                Jeremy had dreamed of this moment for a long time now. It was all he had hoped and more, but a couple of things were different. One was he didn’t expect kissing Michael would be so wet or taste so salty, the next was that he imagined more reciprocation. It was with those thoughts that Jeremy realized he had possibly just ruined his friendship with the greatest guy in the world. The other part of his brain was reveling in the softness of Michael’s lips.  When his brain caught up with the other parts of his body he quickly pulled back to see a gawking Michael Mell.

                “I’m sorry! You looked like you like you needed something to make you feel better! And that obviously wasn’t it and I panicked and I am so sorry! I wasn’t even thinking man! You can forget about that, just wipe it from your memory!” Jeremy stood up in an anxiety-induced panic as he paced and spewed out apology after apology.

                During that time Michael’s face formed from shock to something he couldn’t identify. It almost looked contemplative. Finally, he looked at Jeremy and gave a small smile. The response floored Jeremy. He had been expecting fury and betrayal, not whatever this was.

                “You can calm down Jer. It’s fine. I was just surprised is all. Don’t worry about it. It felt nice. Thank you,” Michael said with a small smile.

                Jeremy was sure he had died and gone to heaven. Michael had said it was fine! He said kissing _Jeremy_ felt nice! It was too good to be true that he had gotten the opportunity to kiss Michael and Michael be okay with it! Jeremy could squeal with excitement, he probably would have if Michael wasn’t sitting in front of him.  Jeremy took his place beside Michael again and gave a relieved sigh.

                “Sorry. Again. You know I don’t react the best to situations like this and…,” Jeremy never got to finish his sentence as Michael cupped his hands around Jeremy’s face and smashed their lips together for the second time that day.

               

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy! Things are just getting started! Thanks to everyone who is reading this! :) 
> 
> P.S. Dustin is mentioned by name during the Smartphone Hour song in the musical, so I stole him for this fic mwhahaha!


	5. The Unspoken Agreement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy and Michael have a change in their relationship.

 

                Jeremy woke up. It was all a dream.

                Oh wait… it was real. Michael’s lips against his were real! They were soft. Oh… they were so soft.

                Jeremy inclined his head and leaned in to the kiss. It wasn’t perfect by any means. Michael’s glasses poked Jeremy’s face uncomfortably, and their teeth smashed together at a weird angle. Despite these things, Jeremy still felt this was the best kiss he had ever had. He mentally apologized to Christine and Chloe.

                After a few more seconds Jeremy felt Michael’s tongue against his lips, asking for permission. Jeremy felt his heart skip a beat and his stomach flutter as he opened his mouth.

                Michael’s tongue slipped in slowly and began stroking Jeremy’s tongue. Not knowing for sure what to do, Jeremy began copying Michael’s movements. In the back of his mind Jeremy was wondering how Michael was so good at this. Jeremy pushed that thought away. He would enjoy this moment to the fullest dammit!

                Their pace began to quicken as their mouths fought for dominance. Michael’s hands that had once been on Jeremy’s face were now clamped around his back, pulling him to his chest. Jeremy took the opportunity to wrap his arms around Michael’s neck.

                He heard himself moan and ran his fingers through Michael’s thick hair, gently pulling it. Michael groaned against the kiss and pushed Jeremy back against the mattress without separating their lips.

                Feeling the weight of Michael’s body on his made Jeremy feel lightheaded. All he knew was Michael. His lips, body, hair, tongue, and the noticeable bulge Jeremy felt against his leg. Jeremy became instantly aware of his own situation below.

                In a moment of hazy lust, Jeremy wantonly rolled his hips against Michael’s. He felt the gasp against his mouth before feeling the returning thrust of Michael’s hips.

                As the minutes passed, they began to fiercely rub against one another. Jeremy felt the sweat accumulation on his brow as he focused on keeping as little space between him and the boy currently groaning above him. It was a few moments later that Jeremy felt the oncoming feeling of orgasm, and judging by the way his balls were tightening he knew it was going to be explosive.

                It was when Michael started to languidly roll his hips and simultaneously suck on Jeremy’s tongue when Jeremy realized he was going to cum in his pants. A huge part of him could care less, and a smaller part of him thought of the irritation that was laundry. The bigger part won out quickly.

                Jeremy separated himself from Michael’s mouth for the first time in he didn’t know how long. It must have been a while considering how red and swollen Michael’s lips were. Jeremy felt a tinge of smugness at the sight.

                Michael’s eyes were darker than Jeremy ever remembered them being. Their hips continued their assault on one another as Jeremy panted.

                “Mi-mi-key… I’m…mmm… cu-cu-mming! OH!” Jeremy gave a loud, high pitched moan as he felt himself have the biggest orgasm of his life. Above him, Michael gave a shout and ground his hips against Jeremy’s one last time before he came. He collapsed against Jeremy afterwards, shaking just as much as Jeremy. Unthinkingly, Jeremy wrapped his arms around Michael and stroked his damp hair as they both came down from their highs.

                Minutes passed as their breathing began to even out and the shaking stopped. Jeremy felt Michael begin to pull away from him. Disappointed, Jeremy unwrapped his arms and allowed Michael to separate from his body. He positioned himself on the edge of Jeremy’s bed and looked to be deep in thought. Jeremy began to feel dread pool in the pit of his stomach.

                A kiss, he could have talked himself out of and they could have laughed it off in the future. This, what they had just done, was not salvageable by any means. How do you brush off the fact that you just dry humped your best friend, and yourself, to orgasm? There is no way they could come back from this unscathed. Well, maybe Michael could, but Jeremy knew he couldn’t. He didn’t feel just lust for Michael. Sure, Michael turned him on, but not because of his looks. It wasn’t just attraction for Jeremy. Jeremy genuinely loved Michael for being himself. He loved that he was so laidback, loved how excited he got over 90’s soft drinks and old video games, loved that he snored in his sleep but denied he did later, loved his off key singing when he had his headphones on and the music was way too loud. He loved every detail and every flaw that made Michael who he was.

                Now he was more in love than ever. He didn’t want to do this kind of thing with anyone else. He couldn’t even imagine anyone else anymore. Why did Jeremy open this door? Doing anything sexual with Michael had been a pipe dream that was never going to happen, but now? He knew what Michael’s face looked like when he orgasmed. He knew how his body felt against his. He knew how his lips felt against his own. He knew all this, now he wanted more.

                Jeremy didn’t just want Michael’s body, but he wanted his heart. He wanted Michael to love him just as much as Jeremy loved him. He wanted him to sigh his name and do these kinds of things with him because he loved Jeremy. Jeremy wanted it so bad he couldn’t stand it for another second.

                After thinking through it, Jeremy decided right then and there that he would resign himself to this kind of relationship with Michael. Jeremy didn’t plan on just staying that way though. Maybe if he could capture Michael’s body, then his heart would follow soon. Doesn’t that happen sometimes in the movies? Surely it isn’t that far from the truth when it comes to real life, right?

                Jeremy stood up uncomfortably. He felt his joints pop in the process. From his peripheral he saw Michael look up at him blankly. Jeremy prided himself on being able to read Michael better than anyone, even his own parents, but at this moment Jeremy had no idea what was running through Michael’s mind.

For once in his life Jeremy managed to play it cool. He was an actor, he could do this.

                “Hey, want to take a shower and play some Mario Kart?” Jeremy turned back towards Michael, stretching his arms in the process. When Michael didn’t answer right away, Jeremy cocked his head in question. Something seemed to snap Michael back to the here-and-now a few seconds later.

                “Yeah, sure, I’ll need to borrow some clothes though. And are you sure you want to play Mario Kart? Y’know you are shit at that game,” Michael said with laughter in his voice. The blank, contemplative stare was gone. Laidback, goofy Michael was back.

                Jeremy rolled his eyes.

                “Yeah, yeah, I know, but I feel like todays the day your winning streak ends. A new champion is coming, and his name is Jeremiah George Heere!” Jeremy gave a whoop and a fist pump in the air as he shuffled through his closet. He threw a pair of athletic pants and a plain t-shirt at Michael before looking for a clean outfit for himself.

                “Sure man, whatever you say,” Michael snickered, “I’m going to go in first okay?”

Jeremy heard him leave the room.

                “Shit,” Jeremy whispered to himself as he put his head in his hands. “What are you thinking Jeremy?”

________________________________________________________________________________________ 

                A month. A month had passed since that day and Jeremy didn’t know what to do now any more than he knew what to do then.

An unspoken agreement had occurred between him and his best friend. They did not talk about their hook ups when they were just hanging out with their friends. They did not talk about their hook ups when it was just them and their video games. In fact, they never talked about anything relating to their new-found sex lives with one another.

The first week, they never went past making out or feeling up one another with their clothes still on. By the second week they had begun to do these things without their shirts, and by the week after that they were jacking each other off completely naked. Each week was another advancement, and each week Jeremy found himself falling deeper and deeper in love.

Jeremy never wanted it to end, but at the same time he did. He was living in a heavenly hell of his own creation. On the outside it seemed as if he had everything. He and Michael were still best friends, he still had the gang to hang out with, and he was sleeping with the guy of his dreams. Jeremy should feel happy how well things were going.

However, Jeremy knew how empty it all was on the inside. Yes, he still had his friends and best friend, but the thing he wanted the most was never within his grasp. He was reminded of this every time he caught Michael staring longingly at Dustin in the hallway or the cafeteria, or when Rich would wink knowingly at Michael when Dustin passed by and Michael would blush. Each time was another scar added onto Jeremy’s heart. It let him know that he was just Dustin’s replacement. Dustin was unobtainable to Michael just as much as Michael was unobtainable to Jeremy.

When looked at Jeremy during their sexual encounters, Jeremy knew he wasn’t seeing him, but Dustin in Jeremy’s place. People like Dustin were worth having a relationship with, and people like Jeremy were not. People like Jeremy were used as replacements and public restrooms, nothing more and nothing less. Jeremy deserved this pain. He deserved this because of how he treated everyone who loved him when he had the SQUIP, how he had treated Michael. So, if Michael needed someone to console him and take care of his needs, then Jeremy was the guy for the job.

Jeremy didn’t know what he had been thinking when he thought he could obtain Michael’s heart. It was a moment of weakness on his part. Jeremy deserved no one’s love, especially Michael’s.

He didn’t know how he could get out of this twisted relationship with his best friend. Not without confessing his feelings for Michael. That was why Jeremy would wait. He would wait for something to change.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took some time, but I managed to get through my week of testing at school and try my hand at some light smut. I really tried, but I'm not for sure how good it is, so please bear with me! I like plot to my stories, so there won't be constant explicit scenes going on. Thank you to all who read my stuff! I appreciate it! :D


	6. Lunch Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The SQUIP Squad makes an entrance.

 

                Apparently, Jeremy didn’t have to wait long.

                Jeremy and Christine were walking down the crowded school hallway to the cafeteria. Christine was talking excitedly about the top-secret script that Mr. Reyes was writing. The eccentric drama teacher slash Hobby Lobby employee had been hinting about the mysterious play since the start of school. Jeremy had made the mistake of asking about it in rehearsal, which led to Mr. Reyes spending the rest of the period talking about the ‘majesty that was his creative genius’ and that the script was ‘out of this world’, and ‘even George Lucas would be jealous’. Jeremy could only assume it was sci-fi themed. Anyway, Jeremy learned not to ask Mr. Reyes about it again.

                “I mean, he won’t even let me look at it! I even stayed behind after school yesterday to help organize the prop closet. Y’know, to earn some brownie points with the man, and he spent the entire time sitting on a chair, eating a Hot Pocket, while talking about the creation of the Hot Pocket. I mean, c’mon!” Christine was on one of her passionate tangents that amused Jeremy to no end. He was glad to listen to something other than his own thoughts for once.

                Jeremy opened the door for Christine, because he doubted she even knew it was there considering she was still talking ninety to nothing about the multiple different ways she had tried to get Mr. Reyes to crack about his script.

                He got to the part where she tried to lure Mr. Reyes away with a Snickers bar while trying to break into his desk when he stopped dead in his tracks.

                “Jeremy, what’s up? Why did you stop?” Christine stood beside him with a concerned look on her face. She noticed he was staring at their usual table. She didn’t notice anything different until she saw that there was one extra person sitting at the table.

                Dustin Kropp was sitting in between Michael and Chloe at their lunch table. More specifically, he was sitting in Jeremy’s seat. Jeremy felt his stomach drop and his vision turn red. One part of him wanted to turn around and run, the other wanted to stomp over to the table and demand answers. He did neither as he felt a small hand wrap around his arm. He looked down to Christine look at him worriedly.

                Jeremy was an actor. He could conquer this. No, he would conquer this.

                “I’m fine, I just thought I had forgotten my English homework. I did it though, I forgot I put it in my bag this morning though!” He gave a smile that he hoped wasn’t forced looking. Christine seemed to believe it for now. “Okay, whatever you say Jeremy…,” she shrugged and pulled him along.

                “Hey guys! Hey Dustin! Did you decide to sit at the cool kids’ table today?” Christine asked sweetly as she pulled out a chair beside Jake, while Jeremy sat on her other side in silence.

                “Hey Christine, yeah, Jake asked me if I would sit with you guys to talk about the game coming up Friday night,” Dustin replied before he took a bite of his sandwich. Michael’s face almost matched the color of his hoodie, except the red was thrown off by his tan skin.

                Jeremy felt like he was about to throw up. He decided to forgo lunch and listen to music on his iPod instead. He was halfway through _Waving Through a Window_ by Ben Platt when he felt someone touch him on the shoulder. He turned and saw Jake waving at him to get his attention.

                Jeremy pulled his ear buds out. “What’s up?”

                “Hey home slice! Tell Dustin about how Michael has the hook up at Spencer’s to get those old drinks you guys are always hoarding! He doesn’t believe us!” Jeremy realized the whole table, except the girls who were currently enraptured by Jenna’s latest gossip story, were staring at him. Michael’s face was still red, and he was looking hopefully at him. Jeremy gave an internal sigh.

                “Yeah man, his buddy Terrence works there and keeps a lot of the old stuff in the back room. No lie, you should see his fridge down in his basement, it’s full of that stuff,” Jeremy should have just shut his mouth.

                “Oh! I forgot to tell ya man! Michael has an awesome old video game collection too, and a bunch of different game systems down in his basement. Isn’t it all yours Mike?” Rich asked, turning to Michael.

                “Y-yeah, my brother is in college right now, so no one really uses the basement but me and Jer,” Michael stuttered. Jeremy didn’t think Michael’s face could get any redder, but he was wrong. Michael began to run his fingers through his hair, a nervous habit that he had for as long as Jeremy could remember. He felt his stomach clench tightly.

                “Wow! That’s so cool. I don’t mean to try to invite myself over or anything, but you should let me come over some time to check it out!” Dustin smiled brightly, and Michael looked like he was staring at a god. It was a look Jeremy hadn’t seen before and he hated it.

                “T-totally! Jeremy and I wouldn’t mind another guy to hang out with!” Michael managed to get out, causing Justin to smile and take another bite of his sandwich.

                Jeremy felt a surge of warmth at Michael’s inclusion of him, even though Rich and Jake looked like they wanted to slap their foreheads in exasperation.

                When Dustin left to go to one of his academic meetings, Jake and Rich both turned on Michael.

                “You dork! That was your chance to get Dustin alone. Not to invite him to hang out with you and Jeremy on a play date!” Rich griped.

                “Yeah, it took a lot of convincing to get him to sit with us! That guy is busier than I am. Do you know how many clubs and sports teams he is a part of?” Jake crossed his arms and looked at Michael in disappointment. Michael hunched his shoulders and pulled his hoodie over his head, not a good sign.

                “Look man,” Rich began as he put his hand on Michael’s shoulder, “Me and Jake would have never gotten together if we didn’t have our alone time. Hell, even Jeremy has dating experience, he’ll tell ya!” Jake nudged Jeremy in the side.

                Wonderful, he had to give dating advice to the guy he was in love with, so he could try to date another guy…greeeeeaaaaatttt.

                “Yeah dude, when me and Chris dated, we went out on our own and did stuff together just the two of us,” Jeremy said leaning towards Christine, who was preoccupied with an in-depth conversation with Chloe and Brooke while Jenna looked up something on her phone.

                “See. We all like Jeremy, but if you want to get with Dustin you’re gonna have to hang with him alone first,” Jake said, putting an arm around Jeremy and shuffling his hair around. Jeremy waved his hand away and began fixing his hair.

                “Fine, I’ll ask him after school today,” Michael said quietly. Rich and Jake gave identical nods of approval, then turned to Jeremy.

                “So, Jeremy,” Rich whispered while leaning toward Jeremy, “You said you and Chris went and did ‘stuff’, what is that all about?” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

                Jeremy rolled his eyes and was too busy glaring at Rich that he didn’t notice Michael jerk his head in his direction. Jake laughed and hit Rich lightly on the head.

                “Hey babe, don’t mess with him. Chris will get super pissed if you ask stuff like that. And Jeremy isn’t going to fess up to anything. He’s too much of a gentleman,” Jake sent him a wink and Rich pouted in disappointment.

                “C’mon Jer! Just give me a yes or no answer. Did you get any action at all?”

                Jeremy winced and looked at Rich’s hopeful face and Jake shaking his head behind him. Michael was staring intently at him from underneath his hoodie, but Jeremy wasn’t paying attention as he formulated an answer.

                He and Christine had never gone past pecks on the lips occasionally, and hand holding. He knew Rich wanted him to give out sordid details, but the truth was there wasn’t any. The only one he had been sexually active with was the guy currently hiding under his hoodie across the table. And he was NOT about to open that can of worms any time soon.

                “W-well, I guess, though we didn’t go all the way,” Jeremy felt his face turn red out of nervousness. He guessed Rich thought it meant something else because he started to laugh and pat Jeremy on the back.

                “That’s my boy, and don’t worry, you’ll lose your v-card one day. Hey! Why don’t me and Jake try to set you up with someone too?”

                “W-well…,” Jeremy began before he heard a slam against the table. He turned to look across the table at Michael, who now had his hood down and a scowl on his face glaring at Rich.

                “What’s up Rich? So hard up right now during basketball season while Jake’s busy that you are trying to get all your friends laid since you obviously can’t get any?” He snapped loudly.

                The whole table got quiet at Michael’s outburst. Even the girls ended their conversation and were staring.

                “Damn man, what the hell is wrong with you?” Jake asked as he rubbed Rich’s back up and down while Rich looked down red faced.  Michael’s face formed from angry to shocked in a matter of seconds.

                “Oh dude… I’m sorry. I don’t know what got into me. I haven’t been feeling well lately and I took it out on you. I’m so sorry,” remorse was evident in his voice as he apologized. Rich looked back up at him and gave a nod.

                “It’s okay dude. Sorry if it felt like I was pressuring you and Jer about dating and stuff. You two haven’t really dated much and I thought I would try to help you guys out,” Rich said. Jake wrapped his arm around Rich, squeezing him gently to his side.

                Jeremy looked at Michael with a worried expression as he returned to hiding in his hoodie. Conversation around them soon started up again. Christine leaned toward Jeremy and whispered, “Hey, what’s going on with Michael. That isn’t like him, even on his bad days, he isn’t like this.”

                “I don’t know Chris. He hasn’t told me anything,” Jeremy whispered in reply. It hurt to know that Michael wasn’t talking to him about his problems anymore. They told one another everything until this whole messed up relationship began. The only time they didn’t communicate was during the SQUIP incident. It worried Jeremy, especially since he was comparing their relationship now with the one last year.

                The lunch bell rang, and the table got up to leave to their individual classes. Jeremy had English, which was the farthest away from the others’ classes. He waved good bye to his friends and made his way through the crowded hallway.

                He was just about there until he walked past one of the janitor’s closets and was pulled in roughly. Jeremy felt adrenaline run through him as the door shut behind him and he heard the lock click. He hadn’t been bullied in months. Especially since he had become friends with the most popular kids in school. One being the girl who could ruin other girls’ lives, and two guys who could beat the hell out of anyone who crossed them.

                The light switched was flipped and Jeremy’s squinted, letting his eyes adjust to the bright room. He looked up and saw Michael standing in front of the door pulling his hoodie down from his head.

                “Michael!? You scared the hell out of me! What’s going on?” Jeremy asked in relief after seeing who it was that dragged him into the janitor’s closet of all places.

                Michael didn’t say anything and had the blank, contemplative look that Jeremy had become accustomed to seeing on his face as he stared at Jeremy. “Michael, you’ve been acting really weird today. C’mon and talk to me man,” Jeremy said as he walked up to Michael and laid his hand on Michael’s shoulder. This movement must have flipped a switch on because the next thing he knew he was being pushed against the concrete wall of the janitor’s closet.

                “Hey!” Jeremy gave a high-pitched yelp as Michael’s hands undid his belt and jean buttons. He then shoved his right hand in Jeremy’s pants and grasped his member while his left hand threaded itself through Jeremy’s hair and gently yanked.

                Jeremy gave a moan and began to give in to Michael’s ministrations. The whole time he wondered what the hell was going on?

               

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are starting to heat up more between the boyfs! The girls will get more screen time in the next chapter. I did get Jake and Rich in there though this time! I'm also wondering what Michael is so ticked about? Hmmmm...


	7. Quality Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy and Michael spend some time doing 'stuff' and talking.

 

Jeremy felt his lust take over as Michael quickly rubbed up and down on his hardening cock. His other hand was yanking on his hair gently while his mouth sucked on Jeremy’s neck aggressively. There was no space between them, as Michael had him pressed tightly against the wall. Jeremy was using his hands to simultaneously hold on to Michael for dear life and keep his mouth shut. Since they had begun this relationship Jeremy had realized a few things, one being that he was extremely loud during sexual acts. He normally wasn’t loud when masturbating, but adding another person to the mix apparently brought out Jeremy’s voice more. So, Jeremy was making sure that only a few whispered moans would break through his hand, and not his normal loud voice that would surely alert anyone outside the closet to what was going on inside.

            They had done a lot of things together up to this point but never in a public place like this, especially at school. It was a little exciting knowing that at any moment someone could try to walk in and see them, but it was mostly terrifying because of that fact. However, Michael was currently distracting him enough to where he wasn’t focusing on the terrifying aspect that much.

            “M-mmm-i-key…,” Jeremy moaned slash whispered. Michael gave a low growl against Jeremy’s neck in response as he quickened the hand that was twisting and gliding across Jeremy’s aching shaft.

            “MMMMM!” Jeremy whined as he felt his balls start to tighten. “C-c-c-umming!”

            Thick ropes of cum shot out of Jeremy into Michael’s hand. Jeremy felt his knees give out as he slid down the wall to sit. He hadn’t even taken his backpack off. He gave himself a minute to catch his breath, then looked up at Michael, who was staring at his cum-filled hand in surprise.

            Jeremy’s mind was in a lusty haze as he slid his bag off his back and got up on his knees. He slid his hands up Michael’s legs and popped open the buttons of his jeans. Then he pulled the jeans to Michael’s knees along with his weed-patterned boxers. Michael’s member sprang free in front of Jeremy’s face.

            They had never done this certain act before, but Jeremy was too horny to care at this point. He opened his mouth and began to lightly suck on the tip.

            “Ngh! Jer…oh fuck!” Michael moaned as Jeremy began to suck in more and more of his shaft in his mouth. Interesting fact that Jeremy now knew about himself, he could suppress his gag reflex surprisingly well. He swirled his tongue around the shaft and swallowed the hardened member down his throat. The entire organ was now in his mouth and Michael’s dark, wiry hair was now burying Jeremy’s nose.

            Michael was now gasping for air and holding onto the wall to keep himself from falling over. He looked wrecked, and Jeremy loved it.

            Jeremy hummed and began to move his bob his head backward and forward slowly.

            “Oh! Dammit!” Michael gasped as Jeremy quickened his pace. Michael began to rock his hips with Jeremy’s motions. Jeremy grabbed Michael’s hips to stop them as he continued his ministrations. It was soon that Jeremy felt Michael’s member began to twitch in his mouth and his balls tighten that Jeremy knew he was about to make the other boy cum. He felt smug and went faster than he had been before. There always had been a kinky part of him that wondered what cum tasted like, but he had been too nervous to try his own. Maybe now was the time to try it.

            A few more hard, quick sucks and Michael began to spasm, shooting his load into Jeremy’s open mouth.

            “OHHH!” Michael arched into Jeremy and groaned.

            Jeremy swallowed the entire contents of Michael’s dick. It was salty and thick as it slid down his throat. He supposed he could get used to it, it wasn’t completely terrible. Jeremy let go of Michael with a loud pop and proceeded to lick the rest of the contents off the tip until there was none left.

            As he was pulling Michael’s pants back up he heard panting above him. He looked up to see Michael staring down at him in surprise.

            “Jeremy, you… kinky… bastard…,” Michael gasped, not quite gaining his ability to speak back yet. He kneeled to get on the same level as Jeremy and scooped him up in a passionate kiss. Jeremy groaned against Michael’s mouth as he wrapped his arms around his back, clenching his fingers tightly into the other boy’s hoodie.

            Yeah, he could definitely get used to this.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

            It was safe to say that Jeremy missed English that day. Afterwards, they left the closet and snuck off to the nearest bathroom to clean up.

            Jeremy’s face was bright red, and he had a giant hickey on his neck. He splashed his face to get rid of the redness, but he isn’t for sure how to hide the hickey. He felt a tap on his shoulder and looked over to see Michael handing him some of the nude-colored band aids that he kept in his bag. One of Michael’s nervous habits was picking at his cuticles till they bled, thus the band aids.

            “Thanks…,” Jeremy said as he took the band aids and began to cover up the evidence of their time in the closet. Once he was done, he turned to look at Michael who was waiting on the next bell to ring by the bathroom door.

            “Are you okay? You haven’t been yourself today.” Jeremy looked at him with concern.

            Michael looked away from him and slumped against the wall sliding into a sitting position with his knees up to his chest. Jeremy walked over and sat down beside him. He hesitantly put his hand on his friend’s shoulder and squeezed. Michael put his head on Jeremy’s shoulder and sighed.

            “I don’t know. I haven’t been feeling well lately. This whole Dustin thing has been stressing me out. I should never had mentioned it to Rich. Of course, he would tell Jake. They keep bugging me about it, and they don’t even know if he is into dudes or not. I guess I’m just frustrated. Ugh!” Michael slumped down and moved his head from Jeremy’s shoulder into his knees.

            Jeremy felt disappointed. He was hoping that Michael would explain what the whole thing in the janitor’s closet was about, but it was all about Dustin Kropp. Again. Jeremy could ask, but he didn’t want to ask a question that he didn’t want the answer to. So, Jeremy decided to put that moment, along with all the other memories he had gained over the past month to the back of his mind. He had to be there for Michael no matter what he was feeling.

            “Look man. I know they can be a handful, but I think that Jake and Rich mean well. They want you to be happy. They also have a point. You need to invite Dustin somewhere, whether it is your house or the mall or wherever, just the two of you. You don’t know if he is into guys or not, but hanging out with him one on one will help you know for sure. Him having a girlfriend could just be a rumor too. I mean, we haven’t seen him acting like a boyfriend to any girls here, right? And Jenna’s social network doesn’t have any leads on who this girl is either. So, don’t lose hope just yet, kay?” Jeremy squeezed his shoulder again for good measure.

            Michael looked over at him and gave a smile. “You’re right man, I need to get a grip. I’ll ask him out somewhere after school, and I need to apologize to Rich again. I don’t know what got into me earlier.”

            Jeremy gave a long internal sigh and heard the bell ring. He stood up and stretched his hand out to help Michael up. He took his hand and pulled till Michael stood beside him. They walked out together and headed to their respective classes.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I promised the girls would come in, but I lied! Sorry! Creativity struck and I wanted to make the chapter about the same length as the others. I'll make sure to include them in the next chapter! Thanks for all the comments! I'm glad that people are enjoying reading my stuff! :)


	8. Pinkberry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The SQUIP Squad hangs out at Pinkberry and Michael finds out that it is a small world after all!

 

            The last bell of the day echoed through Jeremy’s head as he stood up to leave his Calculus class. He was lost in his own thoughts about earlier today when he felt the sensation of being yanked back. Jeremy stumbled for a second before turning around to see the identity of his attacker. Chloe Valentine in all her glory stood in front of him with Brooke and Jenna tailing close behind.

“Oh! Hey! What’s up?” Jeremy asked and smiled at his friends.

“We were heading to Pinkberry with everyone if you want to come?” Brooke inquired as she walked from behind Chloe, their hands clamped together and swinging idly. Since they had come to terms with their feelings for one another Chloe had been letting Brooke have more presence their group.

“Sure! I’ll go get Michael and we can drive over there and meet you guys,” Jeremy said, but as he was about to turn around he saw Chloe grab his arm had him face them again.

“Wait! Michael is supposed to be asking Dustin to hang out this afternoon. We can’t interrupt them!” Chloe said as if Jeremy was about to go commit a heinous crime.

“Okay, well, I guess I’ll bum a ride off Rich and Jake then,” Jeremy said with a shrug.

“They are going to a basketball meeting and catching up with us later,” Jenna said without looking up from her phone. Jeremy gave a sound of frustration.

“Alright, I’ll need to ride with one of you then...,” Jeremy said with exasperation. They could have just said all that in the first place.

“Kay, you can ride with me and Brooke in her mom’s car. Jenna is riding in Christine’s truck (it was just a two-seater). We’ll have to wait on Christine though since she said she had to do something with Mr. Reyes. Something about ‘espionage’ or something like that,” Chloe said while looking at her French tipped nails.

They began to walk toward the parking lot while Jenna talked about how the captain of the cheerleading team was two timing a receiver on their football team with another football player in a different town. How Jenna got her information, only God knows.

They made it beside the girls’ cars and waited on Christine. They didn’t wait long, however, as Christine made her way out of the building dragging her feet as she went. Jeremy assumed her plan, whatever it was, to get the script didn’t work out this time either.

She dragged herself over to them and laid herself across the hood of her truck dramatically.

“I don’t know how to get to that man! I’ve tried, and I’ve tried to no avail! How will I go on!?” She moaned as she threw an arm over her eyes. Christine was in her ‘drama mode’, a part of her that came out only when things were clearly not going her way.

“Uh…you could wait until he tells the rest of us in another month or so?” Chloe said in a deadpan voice.

“Chloe, you don’t understand! As the usual female lead, AND assistant director, I HAVE to know what that script says ahead of time before anyone else!” There were actual tears formulating in her eyes as she spoke. Chloe rolled her eyes and turned to fix the stray hairs on Brooke’s head. Jenna patted Christine on the shoulder in sympathy and began to text on her phone again.

Jeremy didn’t like seeing her like this, so he formulated a plan in his head. Honestly, it was a welcome distraction considering how his life was going right now.

“Hey guys, you think we can postpone Pinkberry for a little while longer? I think I have an idea on how to get Chris’s script,” Jeremy said with a smirk, a look Jeremy rarely used. Christine removed her hand from her face and bounced off the truck onto the concrete in front of Jeremy.

“Really Jeremy?! How are you going to do that? I’ve tried everything, and I mean everything!” Christine said as she furrowed her brow. “I even put crushed up Benadryl in his morning coffee! Newsflash, he sleeps with his eyes open! Literally!” She shuttered as she spoke.

“I’m sure I can help, but it’s going to take a quick phone call and about two days,” Jeremy said as he whipped out his cell and started to dial a number he hadn’t dialed in a while.

“Hello?” A male voice answered.

“Hey man! Long time no see! I’m sorry to call randomly but I need a favor…,” Jeremy continued to talk to the mysterious voice as the girls looked on in wonder.

            When Rich and Jake walked into Pinkberry they saw Christine saddled right up alongside Jeremy singing his praises as he ate a large bowl of raspberry white chocolate yogurt. The other girls sat beside them nodding right along with Christine, even Jenna wasn’t on her phone as they surrounded Jeremy.

            “Hey ladies, and Jeremy. I’m kinda scared to ask, but what is going on?” Rich asked as they sat down at the table with Jeremy, and apparently his entourage of girls.

            “Oh, Jake and Rich! You wouldn’t believe what Jeremy did today! Y’know how I’ve been painstakingly trying to get Mr. Reyes to show me his new script?”

            “Yeah, I don’t know why though. It is just going to suck just as much as last year. Hopefully without the brainwashing though,” Jake said, looking apologetically towards Jeremy, who merely shrugged and gave a nod of agreement. He wasn’t as sensitive about the subject as he used to be. Sure, he was self-depreciating at times, but not always. It was usually bad when he thought about how he treated Michael.

            “Anyway! Jeremy has a cousin who lives in Pennsylvania who is a Nestle company employee who is on the Hot Pockets advertising team. And Jeremy asked him for a favor!” Christine said as she hugged Jeremy tightly. He swallowed the rest of his frozen yogurt and laughed.

            “Okay I can now see that I should not have asked,” Rich said shaking his head and digging in to his chocolate chip yogurt cup, not asking for any further details.

            “It’s no big deal Chris! I should get what you need in a couple of days in the mail. Y’know you didn’t have to buy my yogurt, right?”

            “Oh Jer! I can already see the script in my hands as we speak! And you deserve every bit of that yogurt you sweet, amazing boy you!” Christine squealed and continued to hug the life out of him while he smiled at her affectionately.

            “Hey guys! We didn’t know you were going to be here!” The group looked up to see none other than Dustin Kropp heading toward their table with a quiet Michael in tow behind him. He gazed unhappily at their table as they headed toward them.

            _What the hell? He knows this is one of our hang out spots. If he wanted to be alone with Dustin, he should have taken him to his house or somewhere more isolated._ As much as Jeremy didn’t like the thought of them alone together, he didn’t think Michael should be blaming them for his mistake.

            Christine let Jeremy go and smiled at Dustin with the rest of the group. Jeremy gave a smile that he was trying to make as realistic as possible. He prayed that no one noticed how much his mood had soured.

            Dustin and Michael pulled up a couple of seats and the group scooted over to let them in with their yogurt. Michael continued to look sulkily around the table when his eyes stopped on the space between Jeremy and Christine with a frown. Jeremy had no idea what he was looking at, but decided to ignore him for now.

            “So, what are you guys talking about?” Dustin inquired as he took a bite out of his strawberry banana yogurt.

            “We are talking about how boss Jeremiah Heere is right now!” Christine squealed as she took his arm and began to hug it. Michael’s frown deepened.

            “Yeah, he was pretty impressive. I’m interested to see what else he is going to do when he gets his ‘favor’ in the mail,” Jenna said as she finished off her mango yogurt cup.

            “Okay, you’re gonna have to give me more info than that girls,” Dustin said with a smile.

            That was enough incentive for Christine to relay everything that had happened from the end of school till now. When she was done, she took one last bite of her passionfruit. Dustin looked at her with amusement.

            “You called Abe? How’s he doing?” Michael spoke for the first time since arriving.

            “He’s fine. Just got to start designing new labels with the marketing team, instead of pushing pencils and filing all day as an intern,” replied Jeremy.

            “I’ve never heard you talk about your cousin before. Is he cute?” Jenna asked curiously.   
            “I wouldn’t know Jenna. It’s not like I’ve been checking out my cousin,” Jeremy said with a shrug.

            “He’s pretty good looking. He looks a little like Jeremy. They have the same build and eye color,” Christine supplied.

            “How do you know what Abe looks like?” Michael asked, which sounded borderline rude to Jeremy’s ears. Christine and the others, thankfully, didn’t seem to notice.

            “Oh! When me and Jer were dating, before we broke up, Abe came to visit Mr. Heere and Jeremy on his way back to Pennsylvania. He had come to visit his parents that weekend,” Christine explained.

            Michael didn’t look happy and looked over at Jeremy. “You never told me Abe came to visit,” he sounded betrayed.

            “Well, he came over for just an hour and had to leave. It was a surprise. Christine was over studying that day coincidently,” Jeremy felt like he was trying convince Michael of something, he just didn’t know what that something was.

            “Oh…,” Michael accepted the answer and gave a nod.

            “You mean you two aren’t dating right now?” Dustin asked, clearly surprised.

            No sooner had the question come out of Dustin’s mouth that Michael started to cough up his cinnamon churro flavored yogurt. Dustin hit him on the back until the coughing stopped. Everyone at the table stared at Michael.

            “Sorry, it went down the wrong pipe,” his face turned red and he took a small bite of his yogurt.

            “Ooookay. No, we aren’t dating anymore. We work better as friends than as a couple, right Jer?” Christine said and elbowed Jeremy gently.

            “Yeah, we would kiss, and it felt like I was kissing my sister, if I had one,” Jeremy said, nervously laughing and he scratched the back of his head nervously.

            “Me too! Not that you felt like a sister, but as a brother! It wasn’t gross, just super weird,” Christine added. Jeremy nodded at her in agreement and gave her a tender smile. He loved Christine, he wished she really was his sister sometimes. She gave him a tender smile back. He was so lost in their moment of friendship that he almost didn’t hear the loud scrape of a chair in the background.

            He turned his head to look up at Michael, who had abruptly stood up.

            “I’m going to throw my cup away, anybody else want me to get theirs?” There were a few yes’s as they handed their empty cups to Michael. When he got to Jeremy’s cup, he took it out of his hand, but managed to brush their fingers together. His dark eyes made direct eye contact with Jeremy’s blue ones, making Jeremy’s spine tingle all the way down, before making his way toward the trash can.

            He hoped Michael returned to normal tomorrow. Today had been weird enough as it was, and he didn’t know how much more he would be willing to take if it got any worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ta dah! Here are the SQUIP girls like I promised! :) Abe is an older cousin of Jeremy's that I made up. He shortens his name to Abe because he hates his full name. Let's just say Jeremy's family is Jewish with Jewishy names. I'll give him a minor part in an epilogue or something later. I also took the liberty of Jeremy's middle name in an earlier chapter (I seriously have no idea if he even has a middle name in the book or musical). 
> 
> P.S. I had to look up Pinkberry flavors because I've never been in a Pinkberry before! I really need to get out more... :/


	9. The Mission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The SQUIP Squad works together to steal a valuable piece of information!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am putting a note at the beginning for once heh! I had a lot of fun writing this chapter. I have been writing nothing but angst lately so I decided to put in a light-hearted chapter with limited angst at the very end. I added in some quirky Christine, which is always fun to write out. I also got to expand on Jeremy's friendships with people other than Michael too, and that was fun as well! Hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it! :D

 

            A couple of days had gone by since they hung out at Pinkberry when Jeremy’s package for Christine arrived. He opened the box and smiled at what he saw. His dad, who had peered over his shoulder, looked confused at his son’s excitement over the contents, but said nothing.

            Jeremy walked, box in tow, through the hallways till he ended up by Christine’s locker. A few minutes of waiting, and the girl herself walked around the corner. When she saw Jeremy and the box she gave a high-pitch squeal, making other people around her stare. She ran up to Jeremy and began to bounce up and down on her toes.

            “Is that it?! Tell me that’s it Jer or I will hit you! And I mean it too! Don’t be messing with me Jer!” She said in a rush with a huge smile on her face.

            “Yes, my dear, this is it, but remember, the plan will be put into action after school today,” Jeremy said in a false British accent. Christine rolled her eyes and playfully shoved him. They then stuffed the box in her locker and walked to class together.

            The rest of the day was spent in idle anticipation of what was coming at the end of the last period. They spoke about it at lunch to make sure everyone knew their parts. Michael was out because he and Dustin were finally going to his house to look at his extensive game collection. Jeremy tried his best to ignore this and focus on the task at hand.

            When the final bell rang at the end of the day, they all met outside of Mr. Reyes’s office sans Michael. Christine and Jeremy hid around the corner while the other five knocked on the office door.

            “Yes! Come in!” Mr. Reyes called. The five entered and left the door cracked so the other two could listen in with ease.

            “Hi Mr. Reyes! We were wondering if we could ask you to come with us to the prop closet. We went there to check on the costumes and it looks like some things are missing,” Brooke spoke in a tearful voice, as if an artificial outfit missing from the drama department at school was the worst thing that had ever happened to her.

            “Have no fear popular kids! We shall inspect it closely to see if the thieves have left any evidence behind!” Mr. Reyes exclaimed in what Jeremy guessed he thought was a heroic voice.

            Christine and Jeremy watched the group head towards the auditorium. Rich turned his head around and winked at them behind Mr. Reyes. They took that as their cue and ran to his office, which he conveniently forgot to lock. Jeremy had hoped he would be too distracted by ‘the popular kids’ to do so in the first place.

They searched through his desk and the whole room relentlessly until Jeremy discovered a small safe, the kind kids put their spare change in, underneath a pile of papers.

            “I think I know where it’s at Chris,” Jeremy spoke softly. Christine turned her head around and groaned.

            “Great! The old coot must have locked the script up in there!” Christine said in exasperation.

            “Well, that is why we have our bargaining chip as plan B,” Jeremy said as he put the package on the desk.

            By the time the rest of the squad and Mr. Reyes had returned to the office, Jeremy and Christine had set the package and safe on the desk, and were positioned exactly how they (Christine) planned to.

            “What is the meaning of this Mr. Heere?” Mr. Reyes asked as he noticed Jeremy standing beside his desk with his arms crossed across his chest with a stern look on his face.

            “We have been expecting you Mr. Reyes,” Christine said primly as she slowly swirled his desk chair around to face them. She carefully placed her elbows on the desk with her hands folded, she then rested her chin softly on top of them.

            “Yes, I’m sure you were Miss Canigula because this is MY office!” he said with irritation. “What are you doing in my seat?”

            “Mr. Reyes, Mr. Reyes. You should know what I want. I’ve been asking for days, weeks even. Don’t be so obtuse,” she said with an arched brow. It took all of Jeremy’s acting skills not to laugh. She was very deep in a mob-like persona right now. The Chris they all knew and loved was not there at the moment.

            “Miss Canigula, I have already told you! My creativity must reach its limit. The script will not be done until I am satisfied, and when that time comes I will pass it out to you all, or on the due date that has been assigned by the administration! Whichever comes first!”

            Christine gave a sigh and waved her hand at Jeremy. He walked over to the package and opened it up, revealing the contents to Mr. Reyes. He gave a gasp of shock.

            Inside were a few boxes of limited edition Chicken Pot Pie Hot Pockets.

            “As you can see, I have a bargaining chip. These are all yours in exchange for the script,” Christine said in a voice that sounded strangely similar to The Don himself.

            “Those are not out in stores. Where did you get such priceless items?” Mr. Reyes asked, still stunned, and had not yet taken his eyes off the Hot Pockets.

            “I have my sources. Now ya gonna pay up Reyes?” If he hadn’t been so shocked, Jeremy felt like Mr. Reyes would have given her detention for this, or if he wasn’t so eccentric himself.

            Mr. Reyes looked up for the first time since seeing the contents of the box. The teacher and student stared one another down in a battle of wills for a few seconds before Mr. Reyes caved in.

            “Fine! I concede defeat Miss Canigula! Now hand over the Hot Pockets and no one has to get hurt,” he said with a few fake karate chops in her direction.

            “Nu uh, Reyes. Hand the script over first, then the Hot Pockets are yours. Do I look like a chump to ya?” Christine asked coldly. Jeremy noticed Rich quietly snickering behind Jake.

            Mr. Reyes shook his head and moved over to the safe, put in the combination, and opened it. The safe revealed a stack of papers that was clearly the script by the looks of it. Christine shoved the box to the hungry teacher while she grabbed the papers out of the safe.

            “Pleasure doin’ business with ya Reyes. Our job here is done boys, let’s go home,” Christine said in her mob voice, and walked out of the room. The rest of them followed behind her and they didn’t stop until they reached the parking lot.

            Christine turned around to them, clearly back to her old self as she squealed in delight and began to bounce up and down in excitement. Everyone watched her in amusement.

            “Christine, I have to apologize. I thought I was the badass of the group, but it was you all along, who was the biggest badass,” Rich said fervently as he bowed down before her.

            “I have to agree Chris. You really thought that one through this time,” Jenna complimented.

            “Actually, it was Jeremy who came up with the whole idea. Except the office scene, that was MY idea,” Christine puffed her chest out proudly as Jake and Rich jokingly made bowing motions in front of her. Chloe rolled her eyes and shook her head.

            “Now that we are done with all this, can we please do something fun, like go watch a movie or something?” she asked.

            “Come on Chlo! That was fun! I love watching Jeremy and Christine get into character. It’s so cute!” Brooke gushed as she held Chloe’s hand.

            “Yes! We can go now that I have this!” Christine thrust out the script triumphantly. “But first I would like to thank my dear friend Jeremiah George Heere for helping me obtain this treasure!”

            “I wouldn’t call anything that guy writes a ‘treasure’ Christine,” Chloe snarked behind her. Rich put his two cents in with a “What are we, chopped liver!?”

            Christine continued with her speech, ignoring the girl and boy behind her. “Without you, Jeremy, my Jeremy, my lovely, fantastic, resourceful Jeremy, none of this would have been possible! So, thank you Jeremiah, thank you,” Christine wound her arms tightly around Jeremy and stood on her tip toes to peck Jeremy on the cheek.

            Jeremy started to laugh at her antics before he heard a strangled noise behind him. He turned around with the rest of the group to find a furious, red-faced Michael Mell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly don't know if the limited edition Chicken Pot Pie Hot Pockets are in stores or not. They do exist, but I took artistic liberties with them not being in stores. Also, I forgot to mention last time, interesting fact: Nestle (Yes, the hot chocolate company) actually does own Hot Pockets, and their base of operation is in Pennsylvania! The more ya know huh?


	10. How You Treat Your Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang goes to the theater! And stuff happens...

 

            “Hey dude!” Rich yelled, waving at Michael, clearly not seeing the anger on his friend’s face. “You wouldn’t believe what Christine and Jeremy did! It was epic!”

            “I think I have an idea,” Michael said, irritation clear in his voice. He glared at Jeremy. Christine withdrew her arms from Jeremy, looking between them confused. Jeremy felt nothing but confusion as Michael looked at him with a hard, penetrating look.

            “We’re about to catch a movie. You wanna come?” Brooke asked behind Jeremy.

            “Aren’t you supposed to be with Dustin right now?” Chloe added in beside her.

            “It got cancelled. He got called to a sport’s meet at the last minute. I’ve been looking everywhere for you guys,” Michael said, still glaring at Jeremy. “I tried to text you all, but no one answered,” Jeremy saw a glint of pain in Michael’s eyes.

            They all looked at their phones and saw numerous text messages. Jeremy probably had the most, fifteen total.

            “Sorry man, we turned our sound off because of the script thing,” Jake said.

            “Yeah, sorry. We didn’t want our cells going off during ‘the mission,’” Christine said while kicking the asphalt beneath her feet.

            Michael’s face softened, then he gave a sigh. “No, it’s fine. You guys didn’t mean to. Give me the details. What happened with Reyes?” Michael walked over to Christine with a smile.

            Jeremy drove Michael’s car on the way to the movies while Michael rode with Christine, so she could update him on the script fiasco. Now that the plan had worked out, Jeremy was forced to confront his feelings again. It was a distraction that hadn’t lasted long enough.

            They got to the theater and decided to watch one the newest Thor movie that came out. The group loaded up on snacks and drinks and went to go find seats. Jeremy found himself on the end of the row with Michael sitting beside him, and Rich on the other side of him.

            “You two start making out, so help me I will make a huge deal about it in the middle of the movie,” Michael threatened Rich and Jake. They both looked at one another sheepishly.

            “Why warn us? What about Brooke and Chloe?!” Rich said pointing at the two girls who were currently sharing a large popcorn between them.

            “Psh! Please, making out in a movie theater is too cliché for Chloe Valentine. You really think she is going to do something that everybody else does?” Michael answered looking over at the two girls who were now both staring at them.

            Chloe to another bite of popcorn and nodded, swallowing she said, “He’s right. That’s too romcom for my taste.”

            Rich and Jake looked at her in disbelief.

            “See!” Michael exclaimed while he sucked on his cherry slushie. Jeremy chuckled beside him and shook his head. The movie trailers began to play on the screen and the group settled into their seats.

            An hour into the movie and they were on the edge of their seats, watching the story play out intently. All eyes were glued to the screen. Jeremy was finishing off his popcorn enjoying the movie when he felt a hand slide up his leg. He jumped in surprise and looked down to see Michael’s hand creeping into his inner leg. Jeremy felt himself start to harden at the feeling.

            He waved Michael’s hand away and glared at him. Michael gave a smirk towards him and continued his path in between Jeremy’s legs. Jeremy grabbed Michael’s hand and shoved it away. The janitor’s closet was one thing, but being in actual public in front of people was entirely different. Jeremy hadn’t said no yet to anything they had tried, but there was a first time for everything.

            “No!” He fiercely whispered. Michael frowned and put his hand in his lap. Relieved, he began to watch the movie and felt his member start to soften.

            After the movie, the group separated. Jeremy began to head over to Christine’s truck when he felt a tug at his arm. He turned to see Michael pulling him towards his car. Christine, who had been unlocking her truck, yelled towards them.   

            “Hey Jeremy! I thought I was taking you home?” she inquired.

            “Me and Jer are gonna hang out a while, I’ll make sure he gets home Chris!” Michael answered back. She shrugged and hopped in her truck, started it, and drove off.

            Jeremy turned around to Michael and glared. “We didn’t make any plans to hang out. Why did you lie to Christine?”

            Michael shrugged and continued to pull Jeremy towards the PT Cruiser. Jeremy shook his arm off and walked past him to the car. It’s not like he had a choice in the matter, everyone else had already left. He sat on the passenger side and put on his seatbelt. He then crossed his arms and looked out the window.

            He heard Michael get in, but refused to look at him. Michael started the car and began to drive.

            “Are you that mad at me?” Michael asked in a quiet voice. “For lying to Christine?” His voice began on to take a note of irritation.

            Jeremy stayed silent. Of course, he was angry. He was very angry. Michael ditched them, ditched Jeremy today to spend time with Dustin. Then when that fell through, he comes by to them…Jeremy, as a second choice. Next, he gets mad that they don’t answer even though he knew what they were all doing, but wait. No, he didn’t know exactly what they were doing because he was too busy checking out Dustin’s ass at lunch today, so he hadn’t been paying attention to the plan completely! Finally, he starts treating Jeremy as if he was a cheap whore in the middle of the theater and right now as they made their way to Michael’s house. And yes, he wasn’t too thrilled that Michael lied to one of their good friends. He would have been just as mad if he had lied to Jake or Chloe.

            “Seriously, Jer? You aren’t even going to speak to me?” Michael wasn’t even trying to hide his irritation. “Look, I’ll apologize to Christine tomorrow and tell her truth, and that I just wanted to hang out with you, alright,” Michael said as he reached over to squeeze Jeremy’s shoulder. Jeremy gave a loud sigh and finally looked over at Michael.

            “We’ll talk at your house, I don’t want to have this conversation while you’re driving,” Jeremy said as he shrugged off Michael’s hand. Michael looked hurt, but looked ahead at the road again. The rest of the car ride was spent in awkward silence.

            They drove up into the Mell’s driveway at nine. The Mell’s lights were off. Jeremy looked over at Michael in question.

            “They’re on one of my dad’s business trips. Won’t be back till Sunday night.”

            Jeremy nodded. Better that this be kept private than have Michael’s parents overhear what is bound to be a fight between them.

            They walked into the house and made their way up to Michael’s bedroom. Jeremy shut the door behind them and crossed his arms over his chest.

            “What the hell has been up with you lately? You’ve been nothing but an ass for the past few weeks. There is obviously something bugging you, so tell me what is going on?” Jeremy spit out. Michael frowned at him and clenched his fists.

            “I don’t know what you’re talking about Jeremy. I’ve already told you that I’m just stressed lately!”

            “So you’ve told me, but I don’t see how that gives you permission to treat everyone like shit!” Jeremy heard his voice rising. He felt the weeks of anxiety flowing off him as he took out his frustration on his friend.

            “I don’t know what else to say Jer except that I’m sorry! And I don’t think I’ve been treating everyone like shit!” Michael yelled back.

            “Yes you have! Ever since you’ve been chasing Dustin Kropp around you haven’t been yourself. Take today for example. You ditched us this afternoon, you snapped at the group for not answering your texts because YOU were too busy checking out Dustin’s ass to pay attention to the plans we made, you tried to feel me up in public, AND you lied to Christine! You usually aren’t like that, it’s like I don’t know who you are anymore!” Jeremy yelled. This was the first time either one had mentioned their hidden relationship aloud. Michael visibly flinched at Jeremy’s accusations, then his face turned red.

            “That’s what this is all about right? Christine? That’s all your ‘plans’ were about, right? I lied to your precious Christine, so NOW your pissed!? You’re mad I felt you up when Christine was around?! You didn’t seem so mad when your mouth was swallowing my dick down your throat this afternoon at school! Or was that because CHRISTINE wasn’t around?! You want to yell at me about Dustin, well why don’t you look at yourself first!” Michael yelled hysterically. Jeremy had not seen Michael this furious in all their years of friendship. He doubts Michael had ever been this mad before considering how much his voice was cracking as it rose.

            “Bullshit Michael! You know Christine and I aren’t dating anymore! I don’t have feelings for her like that anymore Mike!” Jeremy yelled.

            “Yeah, well how do you explain how she is always hugging you, or k-k-kissing you! I mean, what the hell was that earlier today? I walked up and she is calling you ‘my Jeremy’ and touching you all over. How am I supposed to take that? And you staring at each other all the time. Even Rich keeps asking if you two are secretly dating! Dustin asked to, even said what a cute couple you were! YEAH, BUT YOUR JUST FRIENDS! Well, I know what your definition of friend is Jeremy! First hand!” Michael shouted. Jeremy felt himself freeze. He felt cold all of a sudden. Then he felt nothing but fury. HOW DARE HE!

            “You know what? FUCK YOU!” shouted Jeremy. Michael’s face began to twitch.

            “NO, FUCK YOU! OH WAIT, I NEVER GOT AROUND TO THAT HUH?!”

            Jeremy felt his vision turn red as he walked up to Michael and shoved him hard onto his bed and climbed on top of him, pinning his arms above his head.

            “Fine! Since I treat all my friends this way, hell, you might as well fuck me! We are BEST FRIENDS after all!” Jeremy gave one last shout before shoving his mouth on to Michael’s roughly.

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man... my heart is beating like crazy after writing that! I don't know what the next one is going to do to me.


	11. I Love You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael and Jeremy go to war...in bed...*symbol sounds in background*.

 

                Jeremy had never felt so angry before. He hadn’t been this angry when his parent’s separated or when his dad refused to put on pants after the divorce. He hadn’t been this mad when the SQUIP constantly called him names or shocked him into submission. It was infuriating how much power Michael had over him. Jeremy hated and loved it at the same time.

                He pressed his mouth harder against Michael’s and dug their hips together fervently. Michael’s protests soon became groans as he began to reciprocate. He felt Michael’s tongue enter his mouth, causing his grip to loosen its grip on Michael’s wrists. Their tongues slid along one another quickly for a few minutes until Michael broke away from Jeremy’s hold and turned them over so he was on top of Jeremy.

                Jeremy felt Michael’s hands everywhere as he attacked his mouth mercilessly. Jeremy gave a loud moan as Michael began grinding down on his hips rapidly. Jeremy knew he should feel pain considering how rough Michael was being, but at that moment it felt good. He felt his anger dissolving into uncontrolled lust as he began to tug at Michael’s pants.

                Taking the hint, Michael unbuttoned his pants and threw them off, revealing a pair of bright red boxers. Next, he took Jeremy’s pants off with lightning speed and gave a deep groan when he saw Jeremy’s tented blue boxers.

Michael bent down and began to suck against Jeremy’s clothed erection. Jeremy gave a loud, keening moan, elevating his hips into Michael’s mouth. Michael continued to roughly suck, and Jeremy’s voice rose higher. He was thankful Michael’s parent were not at home right now or else he would have surely woken them up with his voice. This would have been a hard situation to explain.

                Tired of sucking on his underwear, Michael pulled them off and threw them across the room. His erection softened against the cold air, but it didn’t last long as Michael swooped back down and engulfed his aching shaft in his mouth. Jeremy swore he screamed as Michael began to quickly bob his head up and down roughly, gagging as he went. It felt amazing! He didn’t know how Michael had managed to keep quiet in the janitor’s closet a few days ago.

His vision began to get blurry as tears formed in his eyes as he became overwhelmed. A few sucks later and he was cumming hard in Michael’s mouth. Michael’s eyes widened as he gave a sour face and spit the contents out on the floor beside him.

                “Ack! Ugh! How did you swallow mine?! That tastes awful!” Michael whined. Jeremy couldn’t bring himself to care, since he was currently too blissed out now.

                Michael shook his head and crawled back onto Jeremy while removing his hoodie and boxers. Now naked, Michael yanked off Jeremy’s cardigan and shirt off, causing him to be nude as well. Michael leaned down and started to suck on one of Jeremy’s erect nipples. Jeremy groaned and raked his fingers through Michael’s hair. He switched to the other nipple and sucked harder. Jeremy was about to burst as he enjoyed the sensation that Michael’s mouth gave him. Michael’s hands glided all over Jeremy’s body, squeezing around his hips and bottom.

                Jeremy knew he was red all over considering how hot he felt. He moaned loudly at the combine sensations and thrusted against Michael’s stomach for friction. His cock was already achingly hard again.

                Michael rose up towards Jeremy’s mouth and continued exploring his mouth with his tongue. Jeremy moved his hands from Michael’s head to his back, rubbing up and down slowly. Michael moaned against Jeremy’s mouth and squeezed his ass hard. Jeremy gave a loud moan in response, gyrating his hips against Michael’s. Michael moved one of his hands between them and brushed lightly on Jeremy’s member as he moved passed it. Jeremy groaned in irritation, wondering what the hell Michael was doing, until he felt a finger against his ass. It started to tingle pleasurably, and Jeremy gave a loud whine. He began to rub against Michael’s finger in affirmation.

                Michael broke their kiss and leaned over to grab something from his nightstand drawer. Jeremy looked over and saw a tube of lube in Michael’s hand. He then squirted some on his hand and moved it in between Jeremy’s legs.

                The first finger felt weird and Jeremy tensed a little bit before Michael started to suck on one of his nipples again. He groaned and felt the pleasure kick back in as Michael moved his finger in and out in slow motions. He had never played with his ass before, and now could not understand why he didn’t think of it before. It made him quiver all over, not just at his dick.

                After a while, Michael inserted a second finger, and in scissoring motions, stretched his hole. Jeremy blushed at the sounds he was making. He didn’t know his voice could even get that high.  It ached a little bit, but nothing too serious. Jeremy allowed a few more moments to pass before he groaned.

                “M-more, Mikey, I n-need m-more!” Jeremy cried as he tightened around Michael’s fingers.

                Michael grunted in acknowledgement and removed his fingers, causing Jeremy to whine in protest. He saw Michael squirt and rub a copious amount of lube on his own dick before he saw him move in between Jeremy’s legs.

                Multiple tingles raced up and down Jeremy’s spine in anticipation. Michael grabbed onto Jeremy’s waist with one hand while the other guided his cock to its destination.

The tip of his member sucked in easily, making Jeremy moan. It stung, but in a good way. Michael then placed his unoccupied hand on Jeremy’s leg to anchor himself. Then, he looked at Jeremy for the go ahead.

                Jeremy was sure his heart was about to explode with how dark and lustful Michael’s eyes looked at that moment. Jeremy nodded and focused on relaxing his body. Michael pushed in slowly and Jeremy gasped. Michael stopped and looked over at Jeremy again to make sure he was okay. Jeremy closed his eyes and nodded. Michael continued at a torturously slow pace until Jeremy felt wiry hair poking into his backside. Jeremy was amazed how much of Michael his body was willing to take. It was as if they were made to be together. Two puzzle pieces combined, finally.

                He felt so full. It ached, but it was a good ache, the pain felt amazing. Jeremy wasn’t making much sense, even to his own mind. All he knew was that he wanted Michael to start moving because his body was about to explode if he didn’t.

                He didn’t think he would be able to speak at the moment, so he grabbed a fistful of sheets for stability and ground down against Michael’s hips and the throbbing dick that was inside him.

                “Damn, Jer!” Michael groaned and slowly pushed his hips forward and back experimentally.

                “Ahh! Ngh! Mi-key!” Jeremy groaned and matched Michael’s movements. He found that this helped with the ache that was gradually disappearing. It was turning quickly into off the charts pleasure.

                “Woah!” Jeremy squinted his eyes open just in time to see Michael throw his head back. There was a thin veil of sweat on them both now as they continued to thrust back and forth. Michael looked incredible to Jeremy. His dark hair was askew and plastered with sweat against his forehead. Michael’s tan skin was flushed with exertion. His stomach was soft in the middle, but not to where Jeremy couldn’t see the muscles beneath the skin at work with each thrust. His biceps were contracted as he held onto Jeremy’s body, as if he was afraid he would move away at any second. Jeremy could guarantee that that was the last thing he wanted to do now.

 It was soon that Jeremy wanted a change of pace, especially after inspecting Michael so closely.

                “Mikey! Faster, harder!” He commanded in a whiny, high pitched voice. Great, why was he surprised that he was as needy in bed as he was in real life? Wonderful.

                “O-okay, hold on babe, hold on,” Michael answered in an excited tone. Michael rested his elbows on both sides of Jeremy’s head while Jeremy spread his legs wider to accommodate Michael more. Once they were more comfortable, Michael began to thrust harder at a quicker pace. He began to grunt with exertion as his cock rapidly came in and out of Jeremy.

                Jeremy, on his part, was a complete wreck. His arms had left the confines of the bed and found themselves wrapped around Michael’s neck. He was sure the whole neighborhood could hear his voice as he whined, moaned, groaned, and pleaded with Michael to go harder and faster. Michael willingly obliged as he listened and acted out Jeremy’s commands. It wasn’t until Jeremy was about to burst into orgasm that Michael slowed down. Jeremy whimpered at the loss of speed.

                “L-look at me J-Jer, l-look!” Michael stuttered. Jeremy opened his eyes to see that he was not even an inch away from Michael’s face. He stared into his dark brown eyes and felt Michael’s pace turn fast and erratic. He shut his eyes again and gasped.

                “No-o-o! K-keep them o-open!” Michael pleaded. Jeremy opened his eyes and forced them to stay open. The quick thrusts were losing their rhythm and their voices were incoherent as they neared their own individual orgasms. The only sounds in the room were their moans, the bed creaking, and skin slapping together.

                Soon, his orgasm hit without warning. He gave a loud shout as the contents of his cock spewed out on their stomachs. Michael, still looking in Jeremy’s eyes, came as soon as Jeremy did with an echoing yell.

                They both laid there panting for seconds, minutes, hours? Jeremy didn’t have a clue. All he was aware of was their bodies entwined together and the delicious weight of Michael laying on top of him. It wasn’t too long that he heard light snoring coming from his shoulder that he realized the other boy had fallen asleep on top of him, and inside him. Jeremy groaned (not in a good way) and shook Michael a couple of times.

                Michael flinched and raised his head looking adorably confused. His glasses were askew (had those stayed on the entire time?), a thin string of drool was in the corner of his mouth, and his dark eyes had turned from dark and lustful to a lighter brown and sleepy.

                “Huh?” he intelligently asked.

                “I want to go shower, get up,” Jeremy gently said as he wiped the drool off Michael’s face. Michael nodded and pulled out of him, making Jeremy quietly mourn the loss of connection. He then turned onto his back and closed his eyes. The snoring soon resumed.

                Jeremy sighed and shook his head in exasperation. He took off Michael’s glasses and laid them on the bedside table, then covered up the sleeping boy with the discarded comforter that had been pushed on the floor during their love-making. That was what Jeremy would call it, and he was sticking to it.

                When he tried to stand up he almost fell over, and a thick liquid was running down his legs. He grabbed onto the nightstand to steady himself and looked down. He frowned in confusion when he saw a thick, white liquid dripping down his leg. It then hit him that Michael had forgotten to put on a condom. Jeremy sighed, luckily, he wasn’t a girl. It was only troublesome to clean up, no further consequences would be involved.

                He limped to the bathroom and took a shower. He flinched as he cleaned around his anus and focused on ridding himself of the white fluid. It stung, and his muscles were sore, but he was no worse for wear. Afterwards, he entered Michael’s room and put on a pair of sweat pants. They were baggy, but they would do. He then got a warm washcloth and wiped Michael down and cleaned the bed sheets off the best he could. The only response he got from Michael was a furrowed brow and a deep snore.

                Finally, he put their clothes in one pile and joined Michael in the bed. He wrapped the dark red comforter around them both and draped an arm across Michael’s chest. Michael muttered something unintelligible, but otherwise remained asleep.

                Jeremy was over the moon right now. He and Michael just slept together! They just made love! Michael called him ‘babe’!” Jeremy giggled like a preteen girl. Yes, they had been fighting, and yes, Jeremy had been furious, but he could see how Michael would be confused about his and Christine’s relationship. He would try to wake up before him and make him breakfast as an apology. Then he would explain everything and confess to him! Maybe Michael didn’t like Dustin as much as he thought. Maybe, Michael got to know him and didn’t like him romantically. Hell! He just slept with Jeremy, there could be a great chance that he loved Jeremy! He called him ‘babe’ too, and that had to mean something!

                Jeremy yawned and looked over at Michael’s sleeping face. He smiled and leaned over, giving him a peck on the lips and whispered the words that he would tell Michael tomorrow over breakfast when he was awake.

                “I love you.”

 

               

               

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First time writing this descriptively about sex! Btw Michael and Jeremy are each other's 'firsts'. That was why Jeremy was so giddy at the end. They were both virgins before this, at least in my world they are darnnit! Hope y'all enjoyed the chapter!


	12. Nothing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy loses himself.

            Jeremy whistled happily as he poured pancake batter onto the griddle. The tan goop began to bubble, and he flipped it over with ease. He then placed his finished work onto a plate next to him.

            He smiled down at himself for the fifth time. His clothes currently consisted of an oversized Pac man t-shirt and baggy Nike athletic pants, curtesy of the love of his life, Michael Mell. Giggling, he sniffed the shirt and smiled goofily because he smelled just like Michael. It smelt of detergent and a hint of cinnamon.

            Finishing the pancakes, he placed them on the table and turned to grab some necessities. Michael loved chocolate syrup and marshmallows on his (the sugar addict) while Jeremy was a traditionalist who liked plain syrup and butter on his. After setting the table, he steeled his nerves.

            Today was the day he would confess to Michael. It would be the day that he told him he loved him with all his heart! There was no backing out! Even if he felt like he didn’t deserve him, Michael might feel differently. He may see something in him that he can’t see in himself. Before, he might not have believed those words, but after last night he felt hopeful.

            Last night had been one of the best in his life, despite it starting out so terrible. Yes, they would have to talk about the fight and their feelings, but that was okay. There wasn’t anything they couldn’t work out. He knew that when he thought about what happened last year.

            Jeremy took a deep breath and was halfway up the stairs to wake Michael when the doorbell rang. He turned around and walked back down the stairs. Opening the door, he looked up smiling, then his blood ran cold.

            Dustin Kropp stood there in all his beautiful glory with the morning sun behind him. He looked like he just got out of the shower because small water droplets were still in his blond hair. He had on a plain blue muscle shirt on with low rise sweatpants and tennis shoes. He looked gorgeous, while Jeremy looked frumpy in oversized clothes.

            Jeremy’s mood shifted, but he still managed to smile at the boy in front of him. Dustin had done nothing to him, he might not even be into guys just as Jeremy had said days prior. Michael probably doesn’t like him like that anymore considering last night.

            “Hey Dustin! What’s up?” Jeremy asked pleasantly. He refused to be in a bad mood.

            “Hey Jeremy! I didn’t know you’d be here. Did you spend the night?” Dustin asked politely. See, Dustin was a good guy.

            “Yeah, we got back late from the movies with the rest of the group, so I decided to stay instead of walking home in the middle of the night,” Jeremy replied almost truthfully.

            “I don’t blame you! That wouldn’t have been safe. I don’t mean to be rude, but is Michael around? I had to bail on him last minute yesterday because of a track thing, so we decided to meet this morning instead,” Dustin said, smiling handsomely. If Jeremy didn’t love Michael so much he would have definitely had a thing for Dustin Kropp.

            “Oh yeah, he’s here! He’s still asleep though. I was about to wake him up,” Jeremy replied and moved out of the way so Dustin could walk inside. After he closed the door behind them Jeremy walked up the stairs.

            “Hold on one minute and…,” Jeremy didn’t finish as Michael came barreling down the stairs, almost running Jeremy over in the process.

            “Jeremy, there you are!” Michael said with relief as he took in Jeremy one step above him. He must have noticed the outfit because his eyebrows rose a little before a cough alerted them that they had a third party.

            Michael looked over and saw Dustin standing there below the stairs. His eyes went comically wide and he slapped his hand over his forehead.

            “Damn…I’m so sorry I slept in Dustin!” Michael said, clearly embarrassed.

            “It’s okay don’t worry about it! I wouldn’t be up either if I didn’t have to run with the track team on Saturday mornings,” Dustin replied kindly.

Michael nodded and looked down in horror. All he wore was a pair of boxers and a backwards, inside out shirt. He looked like he had thrown clothes on in a rush.

“Umm, I’m going to get changed. I’ll be right back. Jer, could you come with me for a second?” Michael waved Jeremy to follow. Dustin gave a nod as they both went up to Michael’s room.

Michael shut the door behind them and looked frantic. Jeremy looked at him confused. It wasn’t that big of a deal. Dustin was fine and all they had to do was get dressed, and then show him the basement hangout, no big deal.

“I can’t believe he showed up! I mean, he said he was, but I thought he was just being nice!” Michael pulled at his hair in panic.

“Hey, it’s okay!” Jeremy said walking over to Michael and rubbing his arm gently. “All we do is have to get dressed and show him the basement. No big deal!” Jeremy smiled, but it was returned with a frown. “What’s wrong? Dustin said it was okay that you slept in. It’s also a Saturday Mikey, we’re teenagers, we’re supposed to sleep in,” Jeremy said soothingly.

 Michael shook his head and walked away from him towards his closet. He threw multiple different shirts on his bed and tugged on a pair of jeans. He proceeded to pull the shirts in front of him one by one while looking in his mobile desk mirror. Jeremy started to feel queasy, but shook the feeling off.

“What are you worried about?” Jeremy asked again.

Michael gave a sigh and looked over at Jeremy. “I’m just nervous. Cute guys don’t normally just waltz into my house y’know!” Jeremy’s stomach began to act up again, except this time his chest tightened along with it. Michael wasn’t done.

“Also, do you mind leaving? I promise I’ll call and tell you all the details after he leaves!” Michael asked, finally picking out a casual button up shirt that Jeremy had never seen before.

“Why do you want me to leave?” Jeremy’s throat felt dry suddenly, and it was getting harder to breathe.

“Well, you, Rich, and Jake all said it was better if I was left alone with Dustin. I can probably find out if he is into guys or not, and see if his girlfriend is real or not too!” Michael said excitedly as he styled his hair.

Jeremy felt frozen at that moment. His eyes traveled across the room, from his clothes on the floor to the messy bed where they made love.

No.

The bed where they had sex. All it was, all it would ever be was sex.

Jeremy felt betrayal, anger, sadness, jealousy, and so many other emotions all at once, they spiraled around inside him like a dark mass waiting to engulf him. He wanted to run from it, he wanted to end it, he wanted to die. It lasted for a minute before it all stopped.

It stopped. Jeremy couldn’t even feel shocked at this new feeling. Because it wasn’t a feeling at all. Jeremy Heere felt nothing.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I loved the comment section on the last chapter! When I was writing it out even I was calling myself out how obvious it was that something was going to go down. I kept calling BS on myself multiple times! lol I'm glad y'all are enjoying the angst!   
> P.S. I've been adding in multiple chapters because I've been trying to catch the story up to when chapter 1 began, which I did thank goodness! I also won't be able to work on it for a few days (got to go back to reality), so I'm really glad I was able to finish these last few chapters. Thank you for the comments and reading this story!


	13. Emotionless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy goes through life.

 

            The last thing Jeremy remembered that day when he had emotions was that he said he would leave and there were pancakes downstairs if he wanted any. Michael had thanked him and said he would try to share them with Dustin, if he wasn’t on a strict diet regimen. Jeremy remembers feeling a spark of something, but it died just as quickly as it had come. He remembers going downstairs with his clothes in a plastic grocery bag. He remembers saying bye to Dustin and that there was pancakes if he wanted any. He remembers walking home, saying hello to his dad, explaining that he spent the night at Michael’s house, and going up to his room to go back to sleep. That is all he remembers of that day. He can’t remember Sunday at all.

It was so much easier not feeling anything. Jeremy could go about his day and not feel anxiety or anguish or any of those other pesky emotions that used to affect him. He could even look Michael in the face and smile as he talked about Dustin to him, Rich, and Jake. Sure, the smile was a mask, but it was a mask that let people believe he felt something, that he was alright.

            He could talk to people in class better, he could converse with Jenna about the latest stories on E News without feeling nervous about not having the right information, he could talk to Chloe and Brooke about clothes without appearing bored, and he could match Christine’s enthusiasm over the new play, _Romeblorg and Julorg._ No one was the wiser to the emotionless person that was Jeremy Heere.

            Even the person who he called a best friend didn’t notice. He was too preoccupied with his own emotions to notice Jeremy’s, which was why it was okay that they had both increased the amount of sex they had per week.

            Michael didn’t notice Jeremy and Jeremy felt nothing, so it was fine when Michael would pull him into random closets or public restrooms or his basement to have explosive sex. It was fine. It didn’t affect Jeremy in the slightest. He did his job in relieving Michael, and went on his way. He still cared about him and his other friends, he just didn’t feel anything specific towards them anymore. Jeremy would continue on with his promise of supporting Michael no matter what, even if that meant giving him his body to destress every once in a while, or every day as it was currently.

            When Jeremy did feel things, he remembered the jokes about his constantly high libido. Jokes on them, Michael Mell was worse. Jeremy had a feeling if they were stuck in a room together for 24 hours, all Michael would do was have sex, sleep, and eat, followed by more sex.

            After their first night going all the way, it was as if a switch had been flipped inside his friend. There were no more limitations between them, so the frequency of their rendezvous increased dramatically. Sometimes Jeremy couldn’t make it home without having had sex at least two times that day.

            But, it was all fine. Jeremy would have minded when he had emotions, but now he didn’t care. He couldn’t even find it in himself to have self-depreciating thoughts anymore. That was an upside to it he guessed. He had tried to feel something a few times over the last couple of months, but to no avail.

            There was no happy, sad, or anger, there was just nothing. He was a blank slate, and he was fine with that, or so he thought, there truly was no telling when you couldn’t feel anything.

______________________________________________________________________________

            “So, it turns out he is gay! And that girlfriend thing was a rumor! Apparently, some kids from school saw him with his older sister at the mall and thought she was his girlfriend. They are half-siblings, so they don’t look exactly alike, it was an easy mistake to make!” Michael blabs on and on enthusiastically about his new-found intel on Dustin, and the whole table is listening.

            “I can’t believe my sources didn’t pick up on this scoop! I can’t be losing my touch! I just can’t!” Jenna whined as she laid her head on the table. Christine and Brooke patted her back sympathetically. Chloe shook her head at her dejected friend and turned her attention back on Michael.

            “So, have you made any of the moves I taught you yet?” Rich asks, wiggling his eyebrows up and down. “I told you, those are the moves I used to get Jake.”

            Jake began to laugh and pull his boyfriend close. “Oh really? And what moves are we talking about?”

            “That is confidential information. They are such good tips, I’m afraid someone will use them to steal you away from me! Michael is different because he is so into Dustin!” Rich explained, smirking at the taller boy as he did so.

            “Okay, whatever you say babe,” Jake said shaking his head with a smile, clearly not taking Rich seriously.

            “Back to the topic at hand!” Chloe looked at the two boys with irritation, but they were ignoring her and staring heatedly at one another instead. “So, have you made a move yet? Hopefully doing the opposite of everything Rich told you to do. Him dating Jake is a fluke I’ll have you know,” Chloe said primly as Rich shouted “Hey!” in the background.

            “No, not yet. I just found out he was gay, and I don’t want to push him too hard. I don’t want him to think I’m only trying to get in his pants as experimentation shit or whatever. His parents are really strict too, which was why the girlfriend rumor worked to his advantage. Now guys, he told me this in confidence, so don’t spread it around,” Michael looked pointedly at Jenna who looked disappointed, but nodded anyway. She had self-control when she wanted to.   

            “Awe! You’re so sweet Mike! Keeping his secret for him!” Christine cooed from down the table.

            “Yeah, he should say yes whenever you do ask him since you’re so genuine,” Brooke said beside Christine. “That is really attractive in a guy,” Brooke continued, “Which is what attracted me to Jeremy before we dated!” She said smiling over at Jeremy, he gave her a smile back. Chloe gave a ‘psh’ sound and crunched down on a carrot. Brooke gave her a sweet looked and wrapped her arms around her girlfriend tenderly.

            “I love that trait in you too Chlo! You’re super genuine and honest! You don’t care what anybody thinks, and I love that!” Brooke kissed Chloe lightly on the cheek, causing the brunette to blush and lean into the blonde’s hug.

            “Ahh! I need to get a boyfriend! You guys are making me super jelly!” Christine exclaimed and began to pout with her arms crossed.

            “Don’t worry Chris, you’ll catch one in no time,” Jeremy said smiling at his friend.

            “Oh Jer! You’re the only one who understands me in this dark, cruel, SINGLE, world,” she said leaning in to him. He gave a masked laugh, wrapped an arm around her, and patted her shoulder gently. He still cared, he just couldn’t feel.

            The lunch bell rang and the group dispersed. As Jeremy walked to English he felt a jerk on his backpack. He knew who it was before even turning around. Michael grabbed his hand and pulled him toward one of the EXIT signs in the direction of the parking lot.

            _This is fine_ , Jeremy thought as he followed Michael down the hallway.

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Jer... Stupid Michael. I really love Michael guys! He is actually my favorite character in BMC! I just feel like Jeremy gets a bad rap for his flaws in the musical sometimes. And we don't really get to see any of Michael's. Michael is flawed. And I wanted to write out not only Jeremy's failings, but Michael's as well.


	14. Emotion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy has a bad day.

            The final bell rang for the day, and the hallway was packed with impatient teenagers trying to leave school for the weekend. Lockers were slammed, shoes squeaked against waxed floors, and constant chatter echoed across the hallways.

            Jeremy had just packed his bag and was making his way toward the buses when he felt a hand touch his shoulder. He looked over to see Michael giving him one of his 1000-watt smiles.

            Emotional Jeremy would have worked on not fainting at the sight, but emotionless Jeremy stood his ground and put up a smiling mask. 

            “Hey man! What’s up?” Jeremy asked pleasantly. They weren’t supposed to hang out today since Michael was supposed to be meeting up with Dustin at his house later.

            “Hey buddy! Dustin had to cancel because of an emergency debate team thing that came up, so I was wondering if you were up for some Apocalypse tonight?”

            Jeremy hadn’t hung out with Michael in a while outside of sex. It sounded nice.

            “Sure, no problem!” Jeremy smiled, and it almost felt genuine, even if he was the second choice to spend time with.

            “Great!” Michael smiled, and Jeremy followed him to his car. The same car they had sex in not that long ago. Jeremy didn’t dwell on that fact too much though.

            The drive to Michael’s house was pleasant as they talked about videogames and music most of the time. It felt like old times, and Jeremy actually started to feel comfortable, which was the most amount of feeling that he had had in a long time.

            They threw their backpacks in the walk way and headed toward the basement. Once there, they took their respective bean bag chairs and began to play the game. They played for about an hour before he felt a pair of eyes on him. He looked over and saw Michael staring at him.

            “What’s up?” Jeremy asked and raised a quizzical brow.

            Michael said nothing as he put the controller down and crawled over to Jeremy. Jeremy gave an internal sigh. This was not the casual hangout he had hoped for, but whatever.

            Michael straddled his hips and wrapped his arms around Jeremy’s neck before leaning down to kiss him. Jeremy reciprocated the kiss and put his controller to the side, putting his hands on Michael’s hips. Jeremy felt himself starting to lay back, and gripped harder on Michael to bring him with him. Once laying down on the bean bag, Jeremy felt a pair of hands dive under his shirt and start caressing his torso. Jeremy gave a hum of contentment and pulled Michael towards him. He raked his fingers through his hairs and wrapped his legs around his waist.

            Michael moaned against Jeremy’s lips and began to grind his hips against Jeremy. Jeremy felt himself harden at the friction. He pushed past Michael’s lips with his tongue and wrapped it around Michael’s. Michael moaned a little more loudly.

            Jeremy was a teenage boy. Now, he was a teenage boy with sexual experience. Sex was easy when you knew who your partner was and what made them feel good. It was easy to not feel anything during sex, you didn’t have to look any farther than Michael to see that. Hell, they still had sex even though they had been angry at one another that first night. A fight they never brought up again, or that night after the fight. And that was fine.

            Michael had just slipped Jeremy’s belt off when the doorbell rang. Michael looked up with a look of annoyance. Michael’s parents were away on another one of his dad’s business trips, so it was his job to answer the door, get the mail, do the laundry, etc.

            “Hold on,” Michael said huskily as he got up, slicked back his hair, and walked up the stairs. Jeremy laid there listening to the muffled sound of the door opening and voices. He heard the door shut and waited for Michael to return. He had expected to hear footsteps approaching, but not urgent stomps.

            The door to the basement burst open and he heard Michael’s frantic voice come from up above.

            “Yeah, just wait here okay! It’s a mess and I want to clean up!”

            Another male voice laughed. “You know I don’t care, right? You saw how messy my room was when you came over last weekend!” Dustin Kropp’s voice echoed from above too.

            “Still, if it’s all the same to you, can I please clean up! I get really embarrassed about my messes when friends come over!”

            Jeremy scoffed at that statement. How many times had he come over to see Michael’s room so messy you couldn’t he walk in it? The answer was countless times.

So, Michael had gone to his house? That hadn’t reached the lunch table gossip. He hadn’t told Jeremy either. That was fine. It wasn’t his business anyway.

            Jeremy sat up and grabbed his belt when Michael finally made it down stairs.

            “You have to leave! His meeting ended earlier than he thought!” Michael hissed.

            “Okay, but there is only one way out, and he’s up there,” Jeremy reminded him.

            “Damn! Okay, you’ll have to stay in the closet till he leaves then!”

            “You’re kidding? Is it that weird if he sees that your best friend is at your house playing videogames?” Jeremy inquired.

            “No, but it is weird that my best friend is sitting there with his belt off, shirt untucked, and looking like he just got lucky with somebody!” Michael furiously whispered.

            “But isn’t that what just happened?” Jeremy sassed.

            “All the same! Get. In. The. Closet. Please!” Michael begged as he began to tidy up the room. Jeremy rolled his eyes and stood up. He walked into the basement closet, moved some junk around so he could sit, and closed the door, surrounding himself in darkness. He heard footsteps come down to the basement and heard muffled voices on the other side. If Jeremy listened closely enough he could make out what they were saying, but he didn’t care to listen. He just wanted to go home now.

            Jeremy forgot he had his cell on him, and you couldn’t see the light through the closet door. He checked the time, 6 PM. Jeremy would give them an hour, and then he would take his leave. Michael could go screw himself for all Jeremy cared right now. If he had just hung out with Jeremy like normal this would not have been happening. There would have been nothing suspicious to hide in the first place.

            He checked out Twitter, Pintrest, and even his old Facebook profile until he checked the time, it read 7:30 PM. He had been in this closet for an hour and a half! Surely, they were gone by now!

            Jeremy opened the door and felt every emotion he hadn’t felt in two months come upon him at the same time. Sadness came first, then anger, jealousy, betrayal, grief, they all swirled inside him like a whirlpool, or a hurricane, or some other natural disaster that he couldn’t put a name to right now.

            On the floor, the same floor that he and Michael had laid on not even two hours ago, lay Dustin Kropp on top of Michael making out hungrily. Jeremy was frozen in time. He knew he should look away, but he couldn’t. Dustin’s hands were gripping onto Michael’s torso tightly while Michael’s hands were wound in Dustin’s hair. Neither one noticed the third party in the room.

            Finally, Jeremy unfroze and tip-toed out of the room quietly, without alerting the other occupants. He slowly walked up the stairs, avoided the creaky step, and took off on foot back to his house. Jeremy hadn’t run in a very long time, but he didn’t even notice the burning in his side as he raced towards his house. He was trying very hard not to sob or do something he might regret. The emotions were relentless inside him, and they hurt. His chest was tight, his throat ached from trying not to cry, he felt like he was about to throw up. In fact, he was about to throw up. He made it to the shrubs outside his house, and promptly hurled all his stomach contents behind them. When he was done he didn’t feel any better. Tears started to fall down his cheeks and he was becoming short of breath. He pushed back the feelings threatening to come out, at least long enough for him to make it to his room without his dad seeing him.

            He walked inside an empty house. His dad had left a note on the fridge telling him he was staying overnight at work with some colleagues to finish up a project. He also left pizza money if Jeremy was hungry, which he wasn’t. He walked up the stairs and made it to his bed just as the first sob hit.

            “DAMMIT! FUCK! AGH!” Jeremy screamed and threw one of his pillows across the room, which hit one of his Mario Brothers figurines, knocking it to the ground with a clatter.

            The tears fell hard and fast as Jeremy screamed and cried in anguish as the emotions that had been suppressed for two months flowed freely. He furiously paced the room, taking any object he could get his hands on and throw it across the room.

            “DAMN HIM! I HATE HIM! I HATE HIM!” Jeremy screamed as he took his cardigan off and hurled it across the room. His breathing became erratic and his ears began to ring. He sat roughly on his bed and poured out his grief into his hands.

 It was hours before Jeremy could calm down from his moment of hysteria.

            His body wracked with tremors as he sniffled and let out the last remaining tears. He was sure he didn’t have any tears left after this. He sat up on the side of the bed and waited for day break. Physically, he was exhausted, mentally, he was wide awake. He had to get out of this, he just had to. His time as Michael’s dirty secret needed to end, especially since he had someone new to take care of those needs for him.

            Jeremy could still be supportive, and one day he might actually mean what he says when he congratulates Michael on his relationship with Dustin, but that day was not today. He needed to stop this unhealthy relationship, he just didn’t know how. The light of dawn began to break behind rainy clouds, and Jeremy still didn’t know what to do, but he knew who he could go to.

            Before he talked himself out of it, he put his cardigan back on and headed out into the cold, rainy morning on foot. He headed towards the only one he trusted enough to help him through this. Jeremy walked an hour through the hazardous weather to see Christine Canigula.

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we are finally back to the beginning! Huzzah! I'll be back to writing again in a few days, so enjoy these last few chapters until I'm back! Thanks to all who read and comment! You are all deeply appreciated!


	15. The Spoken Agreement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christine and Jeremy have a heart to heart talk.

 

Jeremy watched Christine stare out the window for a long time. It was strange seeing her normally expressive face blank. He turned to look out the window with her and became lost in his own thoughts until Christine stood up abruptly.

            “I know what we have to do,” Christine said solemnly.

            “What?” Jeremy asked. He knew Christine would be able to help, but he didn’t think she would figure it out within an hour!

            The small girl’s voice turned dark as she replied, “We’re gonna go kick Michael Mell’s ass!” she walked over to a pair of tennis shoes by the door, and began forcing them on without untying the shoe laces. Fear spiked through him.

            “Christine, no!” Jeremy raced over and grabbed her arm. “I need help, but I don’t want to hurt Michael! I just want to get out of this relationship!”

            “Jeremy! He used you! Sexually! That’s serious! It’s practically rape if you think about it. You weren’t in your right state of mind…and…I…didn’t…notice,” her voice shook as she tapered off and began to sniffle.

            “Oh Chris…It’s not your fault. I had everyone fooled. Even Chloe and Jenna didn’t notice, and they’re the most observant friends we have. Michael…he had no idea. He still has no idea about a lot of things.”

            Jeremy turned her around and enveloped her in a hug. She began to quietly sob against his chest.

            “I’m sorry. I-I’m the o-one cry-ying wh-en you are the o-ne in p-ain!” she choked.

            “Chris, I’m not going to lie and say I’m okay, but I will tell you that I’m not mad at you for not noticing. I didn’t want anyone to know, so I didn’t show it. Plus, it was my fault for starting all this. I kiss Michael first, AND I initiated the first time we slept together, I brought it all on myself, as usual.”

            “Jer, you need to quit being so hard on yourself,” she said as she wiped the tears away from her face, “Everyone makes mistakes. Just because you make one occasionally, doesn’t mean your any worse than the rest of us.”

            Jeremy pouted as he let go of her and turned around to sit back down on the couch. She followed and sat beside him.

            “Yeah, people make mistakes, but I make huge, life-altering mistakes. Not everyone consumes a high-tech pill and tries to take over the world. Just like not everyone starts a sexual relationship with their best friend,” Jeremy said as he raked through his hair.

            Christine gave a sigh. “Enough with the self-hate talk. We need to figure out what to do about this thing with Michael. You’re in love with him. Why don’t you just tell him? It would do you guys some good to talk about it and your feelings.”

            “No way. Think about it Chris. I made Michael’s life a living hell with the whole SQUIP shit. I called him a loser. I ignored him after 12 years of friendship. If I tell him my feelings now, it’ll just bum him out, especially since he got with Dustin just yesterday. I’ve already put him through enough emotional turmoil. Besides, he doesn’t want me anyway, except for…y’know. He’s made that clear.”

            “Jeremy…,” Christine looked at him with sadness and leaned into his side.

            “…,” he remained silent as she began to rub his back gently.

            “We need to get you out of this Jer, but how?” she stood up and began to pace. He watched her move for a few minutes before she stopped and looked over at him.

            “I still think you two should talk, but since that’s out, I think I have an idea, and you may not like it,” she said, face going from thinking to worried.

            “Try me,” he replied.

            “Okay, you said that Michael got upset when he thought we were together, or did _stuff,_ ” she glared at him and he shrank back nodding, “By the way, we will be talking about that WITH Rich! Anyway, if people thought we were back together before when we weren’t dating, they’ll believe that we talked and decided to date again if we tell them we did!” she said confidently.

            Jeremy nodded, but then shook his head. “Chris, I can’t ask you to do that. That would just prevent you from getting a new, REAL boyfriend. And, won’t that be awkward for us too? I mean, we don’t like each other like that. Michael is dating Dustin now, the guy of his dreams,” Jeremy looked down mournfully, “I doubt he’ll come to me anymore since he has Dustin now.”

            “Jer, I don’t exactly have a bunch of guys lining up at my front door right now, and I’m only granting you a couple of months of exclusive fake dating, not our entire lives. You’re my friend, and I want to help you in any way that I can. And Jeremy, when things like this start and go on as long as this has, they don’t just stop. What if he and Dustin get in a fight? Who is he going to come running to? What if he wants to have sex and Dustin doesn’t want to? Who is he going to go to?” Christine looked at him pointedly. Jeremy looked away from her, blushing. He was weak when it came to Michael, he would give in to him in any of those situations.

            “I’d like to think Michael is monogamous Christine,” Jeremy said, irritated.

            “Jeremy, I still love Michael, and I’m not saying he is going to see you just for the fact that he can cheat on his boyfriend, or that he is a scoundrel. The fact is that he is comfortable around you and you’re familiar to him. I mean, mentally, and now physically. Michael may get caught up in his emotions with you, and make the same mistake. And you’ve said that you can’t say no to him. You two are so dependent on one another. I’m worried that will hurt you two even worse the longer it goes on, and someone else along the way.” She looked at him with pain in her eyes. 

He knew she meant Dustin. Dustin was dating Michael now, which meant Dustin liked him a lot, since this would be his first public boyfriend. If he found out something had happened between Jeremy and Michael, he would be hurt. And if Dustin was hurt, then Michael would be too. Not just Dustin, but anyone who would want to be involved with them would suffer.

Christine was right, them being like this was too much of a risk. Jeremy needed to make it look like he could move on and be independent from Michael. He needed to quit clinging to a fantasy and let Michael move on with his own life too. They needed some distance, and pretending to date Christine for a little while would work out in his favor. And it would ultimately save Michael from heartbreak that would no doubt come if Jeremy didn’t do it. So, with that, Jeremy decided.

“Okay, if you’re sure you’re okay with it, I’ll do it,” Jeremy held out his hand to his friend.

She gave a small smile and took his hand to shake it.

“Okay, Jeremy Heere, will you have lunch with me, just the two of us?”

“Yeah, I would love to go out with you,” he said, smiling genuinely for the first time since that terrible Saturday morning two months ago.

 

 

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back and ready to get the ball rolling again! Thanks for the comments and keeping up with the story! You are all appreciated! :D


	16. Dating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christine and Jeremy hide the truth.

Jeremy and Christine agreed to meet at the school’s entrance that Monday morning. She had taken him home late Saturday night, and he spent all of Sunday doing homework and trying to pull himself together for the next day. Michael didn’t call at all.

            With nervous tension coursing through him, he waited for Christine to walk up from the student parking section. He was worried he would bump into one of their other friends, or worse, Michael, before she got there. When he was just about to sweat himself into a puddle, Christine came bounding up from the parking lot. She had the usual energetic spring to her step and gave him a huge smile. Bouncing in front of him, she took his hand and pulled him through the front doors of the school.

            People stared as they watched them go by hand in hand. Christine continued to chatter about this and that, ignoring the looks they were currently getting. There was no way Jenna’s network wouldn’t pick up on this within the next five minutes at least. Sure enough, Jenna, Chloe, and Brooke were waiting for them by Christine’s locker when they rounded the corner. Jenna looked as if she just got done sucking on a lemon, Chloe was staring at them with a calculating look on her face, and Brooke was wide-eyed gawking at their entwined hands.

            “So,” Jenna said when they made it to them, “Why was I not informed of this news before everyone else in the school was?!” She looked hysterical, as if she heard her mom died, instead of her friends not telling her that they were dating again.

            “We wanted it to be a surprise! And it only happened this Saturday. It’s not like we’ve been dating for months without telling anyone!” Christine chirped as she pulled books out of her locker.

            “Still! As the school’s information network, I have to be told these things in advance or people will think I’m losing my touch! Do you know how hard it is to have this job?!”

            “Being the school’s gossip queen?” Jeremy asked dryly.

            “Don’t make fun of me, Heere! It’s a lot more serious than it sounds, okay!” Jenna said with a scowl.

            “Okay, okay. Calm down. I’m sorry we didn’t tell you. Christine is right, we just thought it would be fun to surprise everyone. Our friends included,” he said, just as he and Christine had rehearsed. They weren’t the best actors in the drama club for nothing after all.

            Jenna looked placated for the moment. Chloe looked between them for another minute before shrugging. She seemed pleased.

            “Well, there was that rumor going around that you two were back together. I guess this makes it true now.”

            “Yeah, if you two are happy, then I’m happy for both of you too!” Brooke chimed in as she held onto Chloe’s arm.

            They all had classes in the same direction for first period, and began to walk toward them before the bell rang. They were just about there when a voice yelled from behind them.

            “What’s this all about?” Rich jumped onto Jeremy’s back, causing him to release Christine’s hand to balance the blonde on his back.

            “What the hell Rich?!” Jeremy yelled as he finally regained his balance. Jake chortled behind them.

            “Why are you holding hands with Chris? Afraid you’ll get lost on your way to Biology?” Rich cackled in his ear, causing Jeremy to wince.

            “Get off my back you damn midget!” He grabbed Rich’s hands and flung him off. He landed on his feet (damn him) and laughed with Jake beside him.

            “Me and Jer are dating again!” Christine beamed happily as she took Jeremy’s hand in her own again. Rich and Jake looked stunned for a moment before smiling.

            “Well congrats guys!” Jake said, Rich nodded vigorously beside him.

            “It’s surprising, but I’m glad you two are happy,” Rich said excitedly.

            “Thanks guys! We appreciate it!” Christine smiled, then looked at Rich with a gleam in her eye. “Before we go to lunch later Rich, there’s some _stuff_ I would like to talk about with you,” she said with a predatory look. Rich visibly gulped and looked at Jake, who suddenly found the wall very interesting to look at.

            “What about Jeremy?! I’d bet he’d love to talk too!” Rich threw Jeremy under the bus with quick efficiency, but it wasn’t enough.

            “I’ve already talked to Jeremy, YOU’RE the one I want to talk to!” she said, smiling carnivorously.

            “O-okay, then...,” Rich sped off with Jake close on his heels.

            “What was that about?” Brooke asked. Christine shook her head.

            “Nothing, just between me, him, and common decency,” her voice held an edge to it that ended the conversation there.

            Later, Christine and Jeremy were walking to the cafeteria, their hands swinging together between them. They were talking about the latest play rehearsal. Jeremy’s second head had come off during his fight scene, causing the cast to break down in uncontrollable laughter, much to Mr. Reyes’s dismay.

            They were laughing as they reached the cafeteria. Jeremy opened the door for her and followed behind. He looked up to see a sight he wasn’t surprised to see, but that didn’t mean it didn’t still hurt.

            Dustin was sitting beside Michael in what used to be Jeremy’s designated seat. Dustin was leaning close to Michael’s ear, quietly speaking to him about something. Oddly enough, Michael looked depressed for someone who was dating the guy he had had a crush on for months on end.

            Christine and Jeremy, still holding hands, sat down at the table and greeted everyone. Dustin leaned away from Michael and smiled at them. Michael looked up and frowned at them, then looked back down at his tray. Jeremy brushed it off. They needed some time a part, and that was what was best for the them both right now. They had gone too far before. Jeremy needed to make it right again, and that would take time.

            Jeremy had warned Christine about his and Michael’s times in the janitor’s closet by Jeremy’s English class. So, since she had study hall, which she spent in the auditorium helping with the stage preparations, she walked with him to class without worrying about being late. He appreciated her being his buffer. They made it to his class without incident, hugged, and separated. Jeremy swore he saw the janitor’s closet open slightly, but it could have been a trick of the eye.

            This was how he and Christine spent their time for the next month into Christmas break. He and Michael hadn’t spent much time together, and when they did it was in the company of their friends. Dustin and Michael spent a lot of time together after school. Dustin was busy a majority of the time, but he and Michael would meet frequently at Michael’s house after school. Jeremy would ride by on the bus and see Dustin’s car there often. There was always an ache in Jeremy’s chest now-a-days, but he was convinced it would get better with time.

            On his part, Jeremy had been spending his time with Christine and their other friends. Most of the time after school, he would hop in Christine’s truck and they would go on a ‘date’ or to one of their houses to watch movies, rehearse for the play, or do homework. He enjoyed their time together, and the time they spent with their other friends. He had barely been spending time with everyone for three months, and two of those months he spent time as an emotionless wreck. It felt like he was making up for lost time, and he even could say that he felt happy. And happiness was a welcome emotion right now.

            Right now, he was helping decorate Christine’s living room for her annual Christmas Eve party. The tradition began last year when Christine had discovered that none of her friends had the kind of families that celebrated a traditional Christmas. Jeremy was Jewish, not in a strict way, his dad hadn’t raised him to adhere to every little custom, but they still didn’t celebrate Christmas. Rich’s dad was usually passed out on the couch while Rich heated up a microwave dinner. Jake’s parents were still gone, and he was currently living alone in an apartment after the whole fire incident. Chloe and Brooke’s parents were gone to the Bahamas for their ‘adults only’ Christmas vacation, leaving the girl’s alone for the holidays. Jenna’s parents were on the brink of divorce, and spent most of their time fighting over every little thing, especially at Christmas time ironically enough. Michael and she were the only two who had families that celebrated Christmas in the traditional sense.

            After discovering her friends’ circumstances, she took it upon herself to give them a wonderful Christmas party with a gift exchange, eggnog, a Christmas tree, and all the other trimmings. It was never said out loud, but they all appreciated the gesture and loved the parties. Christine’s parents, an understanding and kind couple, spent their Christmas Eve going to the Nutcracker Ballet in New York for the night.

            Jeremy was hanging the last of the lights around the room when the doorbell rang. Christine, wearing a dark green dress with a holly hair pin holding her bangs back, ran to the door and opened it to reveal Chloe, Brooke, and Jenna, who all had a bunch of gifts in each of their arms. Christine welcomed them inside as Jeremy took the ladder he had been standing back to the utility closet where he had found it.

            A few minutes later, Jake and Rich walked in with a few presents, and alcohol. Christine gave them a disapproving look. “Just so you know, everyone is limited to two drinks, and that is it! And I’m picking the glasses you use!” They gave mirrored looks of disappointment.

            A knock on the door alerted Jeremy that Michael was now there. He came by late since his big extended family was usually over at his house for the holidays. Jeremy took a deep breath as Christine went to let him in.

            Michael was wearing a red sweater with a dark washed pair of jeans. He wore his brown Timberline boots that he rarely wore except to special occasions during winter. The snow was a few feet high right now, so it wasn’t a surprise to see him in them. Jeremy’s vain side always liked to see him wearing something different, it made Michael look handsomer when he dressed up. He held a couple of big bags filled with presents.

            He made it halfway across the room when the door closed and shut again. Christine returned with Dustin Kropp behind her. Jeremy internally groaned.

           

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here ya go! I had to proof read the chapter before putting it on here! Thanks for the support!


	17. The Christmas Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The squad celebrates season! *This chapter is a little bit longer than the others*

 

Jeremy sat on the loveseat with Christine while Chloe, Brooke, Michael, and Dustin sat on the couch. Jenna had taken the recliner, and Jake and Rich sat in floor sorting through the gifts. When they had given all the gifts out, everyone began to tear into them.

            “Wow Chlo! Sephora! Thank you!” Brooke leaned over and gave her girlfriend a kiss on the cheek causing the other to blush.

            “Why did I get so many long sleeve shirts?” Rich asked, clearly confused.

            “Maybe it’s a hint Rich, and you should take it,” Jenna said from her seat. He gave her a scowl in return.

            “Jeremy this is so cute!” Brooke gushed as she held up a silver necklace with a light blue crystal flower charm on it.

            “Yeah, you have good taste, who knew?” Chloe said as she looked at her own matching necklace, except her flower was pink. Jenna nodded in agreement as she put on her yellow bird charm necklace. Christine looked among her gifts and frowned.

            “Jeremy, don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t see a gift from you anywhere?” She looked at him with a curious look and he smiled back. Then he pulled out a small black box from the back pocket of his jeans. He heard gasps come from around the room, he looked over to see all the girls with their mouths open in shock, Rich and Jake looked at the box in his eyes with wide eyes, Dustin looked over at Michael with a concerned look. Michael’s tan skin had turned pale, his face frozen as he stared at Christine, who was looking at Jeremy with worry.

            Jeremy gave a laugh, “Just open it Chris, it’s safe!”

            She grabbed the box and opened it to find a pair of sterling silver earrings in the shape of the tragedy-comedy masks. Christine squealed and asked Jeremy to put them on for her. She took out her red studs, and Jeremy carefully put his gift on her.

            “These will be my new lucky theater earrings! These are amazing! Thank you, Jeremy!” She leaned over and gave him a big hug, he smiled and hugged her back.

            “Damn it Jeremy! That was not cool! You scared me to death!” Jenna said as she put a hand over her heart. Chloe was waving discarded wrapping paper over Brooke as she laid back on the couch.

            “Yeah! We thought we were going to witness a proposal you idiot!” Chloe said as she glared at him.

            Jake and Rich were eating the remains of the cracker and cheese platter that Christine had put out.

            “Man, you got me and Jakey D. stress eating!” Rich said as he stuffed his face full of crackers. Jake nodded as he grabbed some American cheese with crackers and stuck them in his mouth.

            Dustin patted Michael on the back while Michael attempted to breathe on his own again, the color flooding back to his face.

            Jeremy felt bad, he was attempting to have some fun, not give his friends all heart attacks. He rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment.

            “Sorry guys. I was just having some fun with you. I didn’t think it would shock you guys that much!”

            “It’s fine Jer. We were just surprised is all,” Jake said from the floor. “Anyway, thanks for the jacket!” He held up the black Nike athletic jacket with a big smile on his face. Rich agreed as he held up a red Nike muscle shirt. There had been a sale, and Jeremy had pounced on it. There was definitely a Jewish joke in there somewhere. The same happened with the jewelry for the girls, it had been embarrassing when he was looking around the various jewelry sections in the mall, but it had been worth it.

            He had apologized to Dustin earlier about not having a gift for him because he didn’t know he was coming. Dustin said it was okay, and that it was a last-minute change of plans anyway, he didn’t expect any gifts, just to have fun with friends. Jeremy still loved Michael, but if he was going to lose him to anyone, he was glad that it was to a guy like Dustin Kropp.

            Michael had been tricky to buy for. It usually was his easiest gift to pick out, but this year had gone so differently for them that it had made it hard to find a perfect gift for him. He had finally found the perfect present while window shopping. It was a gift that got his feelings across perfectly. He watched as Michael opened the box and looked at the patch blankly. It was for his hoodie. Jeremy had helped Michael build up his collection over the years, usually they did this together. For the first time, Jeremy bought one for him as a gift. It was two words in black and red block letters that said Peace & Love in the stitching. He still loved Michael, and he hoped there would be peace between them one day.

            Michael looked up at and made eye contact with him. Jeremy smiled. Michael looked down and left the room. Dustin followed him out. Jeremy frowned and looked at Christine, but she was in the middle of talking to Jenna. The others in the room were preoccupied with their gifts or with one another that they hadn’t noticed their friends’ strange behavior.

            A little while later, Dustin came back into the room with a forced smile on his face. He sat down on the couch and began to talk to Jake about the football game they had watched the other night. Jeremy waited for about half an hour, but Michael still had not returned. Against his better judgement, he got up in search of his friend.

            He looked in the kitchen, knocked on the bathroom door, and even went as far as to check the bedrooms. Jeremy couldn’t find Michael anywhere. Maybe he had left? Finally, he glanced out the dining room window to the Canigula’s backyard, and saw his friend sitting on the deck. Jeremy went out to join him.

            As he walked closer, he saw Michael had a bottle of liquor in his hand, on closer inspection, he saw it was an almost empty bottle of Jack Daniels. How he had snuck it past Christine, Jeremy didn’t have a clue.

            “Hey Mike? Are you okay?” Jeremy asked as he sat down beside him. They hadn’t been alone together in a while, and it was nerve wracking to be honest.

            Michael turned to look at him. He swayed slightly, and stared at Jeremy with glassy eyes. With a hiccup, he brought the bottle to his lips again and threw his head back.

            “Ah! That feels better!” Michael groaned, causing Jeremy to adjust his pants a little bit. “Who are you?” Jeremy looked at Michael in surprise. He knew Michael was a talkative, emotional drunk, but he never had problems identifying people before. Even when he was high as a kite, he never had that problem. He must be completely wasted.

            “It’s Jeremy, Michael,” he said, looking at his friend sway back and forth. Michael shook his head.

            “No, you’re not my Jeremy! My Jeremy doesn’t want to be alone with me anymore!” he said, taking another drink from the bottle. “My Jeremy doesn’t love me anymore, he hates me now!” Michael said as he swayed.

            “He doesn’t hate you, Michael. Far from it,” Jeremy sighed as he looked up at the sky.

            “Nope,” he popped the ‘p’, “He hates, hates, hates me!”

            Jeremy gave a sigh. It figured that Michael thought he hated him. Fan-freaking-tastic.

            “He’s bisexual!” Michael said nodding. Jeremy looked at him wondering where he was going with this.

            “He likes girls and boys! He likes girls better though!” Michael laughed.

            “What makes you say that?” Jeremy asked, genuinely curious.

            “He loooooooooovvvvves Christiiiiiiiiiiiine Ca-nig-u-la!” Michael sang loudly. Jeremy shushed him profusely until he quieted down again. Jeremy turned around to check and see if anyone was coming. When he saw the coast was clear, he turned back to Michael.

            Michael began to cry, much to Jeremy’s anguish. “My Jeremy doesn’t want me anymore! My Jeremy hates me!” Michael wailed. Jeremy put a hand on his shoulder to quieten him down.

            He turned to Jeremy, “Y’know why? He got B-O-R-E-D, bored. We had sex, lots of sex!” Jeremy blushed a deep red.

            “He didn’t get bored Michael, I’m sure of that,” Jeremy said shaking his head. Tears continued to run down his friend’s face.

            “No! He didn’t look like he liked doing it with me! I made him bored! He likes Christine better. He likes having sex with Christine more. They do _stuff_ together! Rich said so! Jeremy said so!” Michael moaned as he swayed back and forth while crying.

            “Christine and…Jeremy have never had sex,” Jeremy told him honestly. He was ignored, and Michael continued to talk.

            “Christine stole my Jeremy! She’s always stealing my Jeremy! I can’t hate her even though I’ve tried… she is cute, funny, nice! She looks like she was made for him! She WAS made for him! They looooovvve each other! My Jeremy wasn’t made for me! He’s tired of me!” Michael cried. “I was bad at sex, so he got tired! I thought Jeremy liked sex. That’s why we had so much! I thought he would love me if we had a lot of it, but he got bored. He likes having sex with girls more, and he doesn’t like having sex with me!” Michael ended his tangent by swigging more whiskey. Jeremy grasped at the opportunity to speak.

            “Michael, that’s not true! And what about Dustin? You love him! You always talked about Dustin!” Jeremy said, he felt like he was in the middle of a hurricane with Michael and him in the center. Michael frowned and shook his head. The action almost caused him to fall off the deck until Jeremy grabbed his sweater and pulled him back. Once settled, he continued to ramble.

            “Dustin is nice…he forgave me. I called him Jeremy when we kissed, and he said it was okay! He told me to give Jeremy space, so I did. And my Jeremy came to school dating Christiiiiiinnnne. He’s not my Jeremy anymore, he is Christine’s Jeremy!” Michael pouted pitifully. 

            Jeremy felt dizzy at this information. Why had he not been told this? Dustin and Michael must have been keeping it a secret! Apparently, Christine and Jeremy weren’t the only ones talking behind everyone else’s backs.

Michael sniffed, and a few more tears escaped his eyes. Jeremy couldn’t take it anymore and hugged him tightly. Michael buried his head into Jeremy’s chest and began to sob into his chest. Jeremy’s heart broke.

            After a few minutes, Michael calmed down. He raised his head and settled into the crook of Jeremy’s neck.

            “You smell…like my Jeremy,” Michael muttered, then passed out. Jeremy felt Michael’s weight give way and settle into his arms. Jeremy’s heart beat faster at the feeling of him being so close again. It had been too long.

            Jeremy adjusted his neck to wear he was looking at Michael’s face. He took the chance and pressed his lips lightly against Michael’s, then proceeded to kiss all around his face in the same manner. Afterwards, when it was all out of his system, he positioned Michael’s head to lay on his lap instead. He caressed Michael’s dark hair as he slept. Jeremy looked up at the stars and sighed.

            Of course, Michael was upset. Jeremy had been too. It had been just the two of them for so long that they had developed a codependency on one another without realizing it. Just like a little kid with a favorite toy, Michael didn’t want Jeremy to be with anyone else. Jeremy had a hard time too when Michael began to favor Dustin over him. It was selfish to have been that way. This moment with Michael solidified the fact that Michael and Jeremy did need some time a part. They needed to grow as individuals.

            As hard as it was to do, they needed to separate. They couldn’t keep up their relationship for the rest of their lives. There was always going to be significant others, possibly children, friends, and other people that were going to come into their lives and take priority. They couldn’t get mad and yell at each other every time this happened, or else they would be doing it all the time. And that wasn’t healthy.

            As he ended his thoughts, he heard the door open behind him. He turned to see Dustin walking toward them with a worried look on his face. Jeremy sighed.

            _I guess it’s time to go back to reality._

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are going down. We got to take a look into Michael's thoughts. I may do a chapter in his POV later. Thanks for reading and commenting!


	18. Can I Talk to You?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dustin and Jeremy work together to help Michael.

 

“Hey! Do you mind helping me out here?” Jeremy asked as Dustin walked up. “I don’t know how he got the alcohol past Christine, but he’s wasted now.”

            “Yeah, sure man,” Dustin nodded and lifted Michael off Jeremy’s lap. Jeremy stood up and helped him lift the passed-out boy. They carried his body between them and dragged him into the house.

            “We need to get him home,” Dustin said as they reached the living room. Jeremy nodded in agreement. The chatter in the living room died down when they saw the three boys enter the room.

            “What happened?!” Christine asked, getting up from the couch and walking toward them.

            “Michael’s fine, he just had too much to drink,” Jeremy said. Christine’s face went from worried to disapproving in an instant. “How did he get alcohol? I locked it all up AND rationed it out!” Dustin and Jeremy laid Michael on the couch to rest their arms. Jeremy walked to the Canigula’s kitchen. The other teens looked at one another, confused, and then decided to follow him.

            “Just as I thought…Mike picked the lock,” Jeremy said as he inspected the simple key lock to the liquor cabinet.

            “Picked it?! Since when could Michael do that?” Rich asked.

            “A few years ago, Michael and I went through a magic trick phase,” Jeremy explained. The group gave Jeremy surprised looks. “He was way better than I was with the whole Houdini escape artist stuff. He was always good at the lock and key tricks.”

            “Okay, I’ll just go ahead and ask, why?” Chloe asked from the front of the group.

            “No reason…,” Jeremy tapered off.

            “You thought THAT would help you pick up chicks or dudes?!” Jake sounded incredulous from the back of the kitchen. Jeremy shrugged sheepishly and headed to the closet where his jacket was. Dustin began to do the same. Michael hadn’t brought anything else to wear, so they left him be. Next, they gathered up all his and Dustin’s gifts and put them in their respective cars since they hadn’t ridden together. Finally, they both were ready to get Michael into one of the vehicles.

            Jeremy told Dustin that he would drive Michael in his own car, in case he woke up and freaked out not being in his car. A lame excuse, but a selfish part of Jeremy didn’t want Dustin to be alone with Michael, especially since Jeremy hadn’t spent any alone time with Michael in over a month. Dustin didn’t question Jeremy’s logic and helped drag Michael’s comatose body to the passenger side of the PT cruiser. Once they managed to get him in a sitting position, Jeremy leaned over Michael to buckle him in.

            They both drove over to Michael’s house, but had to park farther down the street because of all the relatives’ cars in the Mell’s driveway. They grabbed Michael’s bag of gifts, then Dustin and Jeremy yanked Michael out of the car and dragged him up the driveway to the front door. Jeremy used the house key Michael gave him years ago to open the door quietly.

            Dustin began to head toward the stairs when Jeremy stopped him by pulling Michael’s body gently toward him. The blonde turned and looked at Jeremy with a curious look.

            “What’s wrong? This is the way to his bedroom,” Dustin whispered.

            Jeremy shook his head and whispered back, “When Michael’s relatives visit his aunt and uncle sleep in his room, and his cousins sleep in the floor. Michael sleeps in the basement because it’s the only empty room in the house to sleep. It’s too cold for the rest of them.” Michael even had anxiety when it came to his own family. He could be around a lot of people for only so long before he took refuge in the basement. Jeremy had spent many family gatherings down there snuggled with Michael while playing video games. They eventually had to buy a space heater because they both had caught colds sleeping down there one night.

            Dustin nodded and headed toward the basement. Jeremy grabbed Michael’s feet while Dustin grabbed his torso as they made their way down the narrow stairway to the basement. Once making it safely, they gently laid Michael down on his makeshift pallet.

            Jeremy then unbuttoned Michael’s pants, causing Dustin to quietly gasp. Jeremy looked at him and rolled his eyes.

            “He sleeps in his underwear most of the time,” he explained. Dustin closed his mouth and nodded. “Can you go get me a wet washcloth? They’re in the bathroom over there.” Jeremy nudged his head toward the basement bathroom and pulled Michael’s jeans off, folding them neatly at the end of Michael’s pallet. The bathroom only had a toilet and sink, but came in handy for late night binging on games and weed. Dustin nodded and went to go do as Jeremy asked.

            Quickly, Jeremy pulled Michael’s sweater off, revealing his bare chest with dark black hairs scattered across it. He then threw Michael’s covers over him and turned on the heater. A selfish part of Jeremy (not for the first time tonight) didn’t want Dustin to see Michael’s naked chest, even if he had already seen it all. Jeremy didn’t want to think about that right now though.

            Dustin returned with the wet cloth and handed it to him. Jeremy took Michael’s glasses off, put them on top of the folded clothes, then wiped Michael’s red face off with the cool cloth. He was sure to be dehydrated tomorrow morning, might as well help it not be so bad. He brushed Michael’s hair out of his face tenderly and set the washcloth beside his head. Jeremy stood up and stretched, looking over at Dustin who was staring at him with a perplexed look.

            Jeremy looked away, “We should leave before Michael’s family finds out he got plastered, and he needed us to drag him inside.”

            “Yeah,” Dustin followed him up the stairs out of the house without disturbing the occupants inside. Jeremy locked the door behind them.

            “Do you mind driving me back to Chris’s house?” Jeremy asked, looking at the blonde who was heading over to his car.

            “Sure, it isn’t that far anyway.”

            The drive was silent. They had never hung out before, so there wasn’t a lot to say. What do you talk about with the love of your life’s boyfriend? Jeremy tried not to get too dejected by that thought.

            Nothing was said even when they made it back to Christine’s driveway. Dustin turned the car off and looked over at Jeremy. Jeremy unbuckled his seat belt and reached for the door handle when Dustin stopped him.

            “Hey, Jeremy, can I talk to you for a minute,” he looked concerned. Jeremy was mentally sweating, but he guessed that this talk was bound to happen sometime. He let go of the handle and nodded.

            “Yeah, what do you want to talk about?” Jeremy had a few guesses, but played dumb.

            “It’s about Michael, since you guys quit hanging out he hasn’t been himself. He’s been depressed. It’s not any of my business, but Michael told me what happened between you guys. He told me everything actually. I was just wondering if you could talk this out with him? He hasn’t been himself lately.”

            Jeremy looked away from him and down at his hands, clenching them in and out. He couldn’t be mad at Michael for telling Dustin about their relationship. Jeremy had told Christine after all.

            “Dustin. Thank you for being there for Michael. I’m glad he was able to find another friend that was a cool as you by himself without help,” Jeremy gave him a smile, Dustin blushed at the praise. The guy really was as humble as you could get. “Michael and I have been friends for thirteen years. We’ve been close that entire time. You could even say, we’ve been friends for almost our entire lives. Growing up, we were never the most popular guys in school, not only that, but both of us have issues making friends because of our anxiety. I don’t know if WE would have been friends if we hadn’t met when we were toddlers. Because of that, we got too comfortable. We limited ourselves to just one another, and didn’t reach out to the people around us.”

Jeremy looked at the Christmas lights on the Canigula’s house, Dustin remained quiet as Jeremy gathered his thoughts. “I think we put ourselves in an unhealthy, bubbled-up relationship. I mean…we even relied on each other for sex!” Jeremy brushed his hair back from his face and did his best not to cry, though he doesn’t think that he’s fooling Dustin by the way he reached over to squeeze Jeremy’s shoulder in sympathy. “We developed a relationship based on codependency. We got too comfortable.” Jeremy wiped his wet eyes and looked at Dustin. Dustin frowned and looked at him with concern. “I appreciate that you are looking out for him. You talked to me even though it was probably going to be the most uncomfortable conversation of your life so far. You’re a great guy and I’m happy Michael has you. I know you want me to talk to him, but I’m going to keep away from Michael a little while longer. The only way to get us back to normal is having some space between us. We need to work on meeting new people and building new relationships. If we don’t, we’ll just hold each other back. You understand, right?” Dustin let go of his shoulder and reluctantly nodded. Jeremy smiled and turned, but Dustin wasn’t finished.

            “I think I get where you’re coming from, but I need to know. Do you love Michael?” Dustin looked at him with a serious face. Jeremy gulped, flushing.

            “Of course I do, he’s my best friend,” he vaguely answered.

            “Okay, I guess that was too indirect of a question,” Dustin said as he rubbed a hand down in his face. “Let me rephrase, are you IN love with Michael? Romantically?”

            Jeremy looked down at his hands again in embarrassment. He quietly nodded and looked at Dustin with a look of desperation. “Do me a favor please. Don’t tell Michael that I helped you bring him back home. In fact, don’t tell him we talked at all tonight. And please don’t tell him what I just told you,” Jeremy grabbed Dustin’s hand and squeezed, his eyes pleading with the boy next to him.

            Dustin sighed, “I don’t agree with you not talking to each other, and I think you are underestimating Michael’s feelings for you. But I won’t say anything because it’s not my business. I will say this though, if I had someone I had feelings for like that, I wouldn’t hesitate.”

            Jeremy felt confused. Weren’t Michael and Dustin dating? Didn’t Dustin love Michael like Michael loved him? Jeremy shook this from his thoughts. When he hoped too much, it usually blew up in his face.

            He got out of the car and headed to the house as Dustin drove away.

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dustin is a sweetie! His name belongs to BMC, but his personality is mine! I'm loving the Hamilton references in the comment section! I am obsessive when it comes to finishing projects or goals, thus the frequent updates. Thanks for the comments and reading my story!


	19. I Hate How Much I Love You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy and Christine have a sleepover. *This chapter is way longer than the others!*

 

When he walked back in the house, the others were playing a game of charades. Or so Jeremy thought. Rich was currently doing a hand stand while sporadically moving his legs back and forth. Christine was yelling out various things while Jake rolled on the floor laughing. Brooke and Chloe were curled up together on the couch watching the scene with amusement while Jenna was taking numerous pictures, threatening to put them on Twitter.

            “Spider stuck on a web! No… tadpole in a pond! No… worm on a hook!” Christine shouted as Rich shook his head furiously.

            “Hey guys,” Jeremy greeted after he had taken his coat to the closet.

            “Jeremy! Did you get Mike back to his house?” Jake asked from the floor.

            “Yeah, we managed to do it without his family finding out.”

            “Cool! Come help us figure out what Rich is.” Christine waved him over and patted the seat beside her. He smiled and took her up on the offer.

            “Let’s see...one of those flappy guys that they put outside of the used car lots?”

            “Yes! You got it!” Rich exclaimed as he got off his hands to sit down beside Jake.

            “What?! You didn’t have to do a handstand for that!” Christine exclaimed.

            “No! But it made it so much more interesting, right Jakey D.?” He said as he nudged his boyfriend lightly with his elbow. Jake laughed and enveloped him in a side hug.

            “Yeah, a lot more interesting babe!”

            “You guys are the worst,” Christine pouted.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------

A couple of hours later, everyone began to head out.

 Jeremy stayed behind to help Christine clean up, continuing his part as the ever-helpful boyfriend. Honestly, he would have done it anyway, even if they weren’t fake dating. It was still a nice touch though.

When they were done, they both sat down on the couch. Jeremy sipped on a hot chocolate while Christine settled with her earl grey tea. They both sat in comfortable silence for a little while before Christine broke it.

“So, what happened when you and Dustin took Michael home?”

“Nothing. We just took him home and he drove me back,” Jeremy replied.

“Please don’t lie to me Jeremy. You looked uncomfortable for the rest of the party after you got back. Your head wasn’t there with us,” she said looking over at him with a look of disappointment. He visibly winced at the look.

“Sorry, force of habit. Hiding my feelings is a second instinct now. Everything was fine until he drove me back. He admitted that Michael told him about our relationship, and he wanted me to talk it out with Michael,” Jeremy said, and looked down into his hot chocolate.

“Sounds like a good idea to me Jeremy. You can’t just keep avoiding Michael,” she spoke softly, and then took a sip of tea.

“You know why I can’t do that Christine. It’s better for both me and Michael if we stay a part for a while.” Jeremy took another mouthful of his drink as he stared at the falling snow outside. Christine sighed and shook her head.

“Fine. I can’t force you to do it, but I gave you my two cents.”

“Thanks, but I’ll be fine. Michael will understand later. I was just holding him back anyway. All I did was make his life complicated, and I hurt him countless times by being insensitive. Dustin will be so much better for Michael than I ever could,” Jeremy said as he looked down, tears stinging his eyes. “I’m oblivious, my face turns red whenever I get nervous, I’m a pushover, I’m not that smart, I’m not athletic at all, I have average looks…,” his voice faded out and tears began to spill out on his cheeks. He felt a small hand wipe his tears off.

“Oh Jer…look at me,” Christine spoke gently. He turned his head to look at her. She had tears forming in her own eyes as she stared at him.

“You are an amazing guy Jer. Yes, you’ve made mistakes, but everyone on this planet has too. And don’t say that you have made the worst mistakes of anybody else, because I can name countless historical figures that would prove you wrong. Michael loves you. In what form, I don’t know, but whenever you talk it out in the end, Michael will still be there for you no matter what. I mean, look how he is still with you despite the whole SQUIP thing, or anything else you might have done without thinking about Michael’s feelings. He forgave you each time. I know he’ll forgive you this time, and still be your friend. Don’t think so little of him Jer, or yourself for that matter. Michael, me, the rest of our friends all see the good in you, why can’t you?”

She cupped his face in her hands and kissed him softly on the forehead. He whimpered a little bit and began to softly sob. Christine wrapped her arms around his neck and let him cry in her shoulder.

Later, they released one another. They both wiped their eyes and noses with some Kleenex that Christine had acquired and laid back on the couch again.

“We are both emotional wrecks Jeremy Heere,” Christine dryly told him. He chuckled at his friend.

“That we are Christine Canigula, that we are.” Jeremy checked his wrist watch. It read 1:00 AM. He sighed aloud.

“I better get going Chris, it’s morning,” he said standing up. Christine nodded, then frowned.

“Jeremy, can I stay over with you tonight?”

He looked at her with a confused look on his face. Only the guys in their group had stayed over, never the girls, for obvious reasons.

“Don’t look at me like that! You know I didn’t mean it that way!” She said smacking him lightly on the arm. “I’m worried about leaving you alone tonight. The last time I left you alone with your own thoughts you ended up losing your emotions for months. I want to be here for you Heere!” She smiled tenderly at him. He smiled back and nodded.

“Sure, my dad is at my uncle’s house tonight anyway, so there won’t be any drama with him,” Jeremy said as he went to go get his coat.

“Okay, just wait a few minutes while I go pack an overnight bag,” she said as she bounced up the stairs. He chuckled under his breath as he put on his coat and gloves.

Christine drove them to his house slowly through the mini snowstorm that was passing through New Jersey. When they made it into the driveway safely, they ran up to the house in the freezing cold. Jeremy’s fingers felt numb, even with his gloves on, as he struggled with his housekey. When he finally got it in the lock, he turned the key and entered the warm house with Christine behind him with her overnight bag in tow.

They set up a pallet in Jeremy’s bedroom floor. Jeremy coerced Christine into taking his bed while he took the floor. He said she was his guest, but she accused him of sexism. Then she said he won the battle, but not the war. Jeremy had shaken his head and took his pajama bottoms and t-shirt to the bathroom to get changed. He gave Christine a few minutes in his room so she could get changed too.

Jeremy walked in as she was laying down. He laid down on the pallet, wished Christine a good night, then closed his eyes. It wasn’t long after he heard Christine’s deep, steady breathing while she slept that he drifted off with her.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Jeremy woke up to a soft, white light peeking through his curtains. He opened his eyes to see his ceiling come into view. He was on the floor. Why was he on the floor? Oh yeah, Christine spent the night. He looked over at his bed to see it empty.

Jeremy sat up and stretched. His alarm clock read 11:00 AM. He had overslept, not surprising since he and Christine hadn’t fallen asleep till around 2 in the morning. Standing up, he headed toward the bathroom. When he opened his door, the smell of pancakes hit his nose. He smiled. Christine was so thoughtful.

He continued his walk to the restroom. While there, he heard the doorbell ring. Strange, they hadn’t been expecting anyone. Even his dad wouldn’t be back till later because of the snow accumulation that had occurred over night. Finishing up, he walked out to hear the door open. Christine must have answered the door bell. He made it to the top of the stairs when he heard an angry voice coming from below.

“What the hell are you doing here?! Where is Jeremy?!”

Jeremy looked down to see Michael at the door glaring at Christine with a burning intensity. Jeremy couldn’t see Christine’s face, but her pajama-clad body had turned stiff.

“He is upstairs still asleep. I can go get him...,” she started when Michael interrupted her.

“No, I’ll go see him myself. I know where his bedroom is Christine. I think I know his place better than you do,” Michael snapped as he pushed her out of the way to get in the house. She stumbled back into the door frame with a shocked look on her face. Jeremy felt anger course through him.

He stomped down the stairs quickly. Michael looked up angrily long enough to see him make it downstairs and walk past him to check on Christine.

“Are you okay Chris?” Jeremy asked with concern. The arm that had knocked into the door frame was covered up by her cotton nightgown, so he couldn’t see any damage, but she winced when he lightly touched the area.  

“I think it’s okay, probably just bruised at worst,” she said, rubbing it softly.

Jeremy nodded and turned around on Michael, who was seething behind him.

“What the hell is wrong with you?! You just pushed a girl, a girl who happens to be your friend too!” Jeremy said with a raised voice, anger lacing his tone.

“You want to know what the hell I’m doing, what are you doing?! What is she doing here in her pajamas Jeremy?! I know! She slept over while your dad’s gone! I see how it is. You tossed me aside so you can fuck Christine! I’m glad that I could give you some experience so you could test it out on the one you really wanted to fuck!” He yelled. “Glad I could be of service to you Jer!” he sarcastically added.

“Oh, get off your pedestal Mike! Like you honestly gave a crap about how I felt when we fucked. You were too busy chasing after Dustin’s ass to notice anything! Dustin Fucking Kropp! Who was using who exactly?!” Jeremy spat back.

“Bull shit! Don’t act like you’re innocent! You wanted it just as much as I did! And don’t bring Dustin into this! He didn’t do anything wrong!”

“Of course he didn’t! Because Dustin doesn’t do anything wrong! Dustin is perfect! Damn sunshine comes out of his ass doesn’t it Michael?! Unlike me, he hasn’t done anything to ruin your life like I have! He doesn’t call you names or make you miserable like I do! Dustin is so handsome, Dustin says the funniest shit, Dustin, Dustin, Dustin, y’know WHAT?! I AM SICK AND TIRED OF HEARING ABOUT DUSTIN FUCKING KROPP DAMMIT!” Jeremy shouted. Months’ worth of anger and frustration rolled off Jeremy in waves as he yelled. It felt good dammit!

“You think you’re so much better?! How do you think I felt when all you would talk about, all you could see, was CHRISTINE CANIGULA! Christine is so pretty, so talented, so quirky, so smart! I wrote her a letter Michael telling her I felt! But I flushed it because I am so scared of being rejected by little Miss Perfect Christine Canigula! I’m not worthy of basking in her damn radiance! Oh, Christiiiiiiiiiiinnnne Ca-nig-u-la! Come and fuck me already! I’m still a virgin, but I promise to rock your world! Looks like you finally accomplished that Jeremy! Good for you!” Michael yelled. He was shaking from head to toe, and was beat red in the face. Jeremy could care less how angry he was. Jeremy was mad too.

“SHUT THE HELL UP! What do you know about MY feelings?! You spent months fucking me, but never took the time to stop and talk about it! What do you care about my pain?! AND I did not, and never have I, slept with Christine! GET THAT THROUGH YOUR DAMN HEAD ALRREADY! I spent two months not feeling anything because of you! How do you think I felt when we first slept together and the next morning you were kicking me out of your house so you could get in Dustin Kropp’s pants?! I DIED INSIDE THAT DAY YOU INSENSITIVE BASTARD!” Jeremy screamed, tears began to fall down his face. He knew without looking that his face was tomato red.

Michael scoffed, “Your calling ME insensitive? Who was the one who decided all on their own to separate us for our own good?! What gives you the right to make that decision?! I am sick of this damn martyr complex you have going on! You think being a part will help us move on?! You think it will help us grow?! I don’t know about you Jeremy, but any moving on or growing up I have done over the years has happened with YOU right by MY side Jeremy! You don’t get to make those kinds of decisions all on your own without talking to me you idiot! Spouting nonsense about ‘codependency’ and ‘letting me go’, where did that bullshit come from anyway?! And did you think maybe the reason I tried to kick you out that day was to do it before you decided to leave on your own! Yeah, I acted like an ass because that was easier than seeing you walk out of my house like that night didn’t mean anything to you! So yeah, I made you leave before I got hurt! All those times we had sex?! Of course I didn’t say anything! Each time we did it could have been the last time for all I knew! If I brought it up and asked how you felt, it would have given me an answer that I didn’t want to hear!” Michael shouted.

“See! This is why it is better if we were a part! All we do is make each other miserable!” Jeremy shouted back.

Michael looked ready to rip his own hair right out of his head. “WHY JEREMY? WHY? What makes you think it is okay if we were separated?! We have been together since we were toddlers Jeremy! When have we ever made one another ‘miserable’?!”

“THE SQUIP MICHAEL! I called you a LOSER! I gave you an anxiety attack AND left you alone for months on end, all so I could become popular and impress a girl?! I’m oblivious, insensitive, stupid, average! There is nothing redeemable about me! You might as well go while I am giving you an out!” Jeremy cried, tear streaming down harder.

“Jeremy, none of that is true! What is the REAL reason you want to separate? You’ve always had these issues with yourself Jeremy, but you’ve NEVER taken it out on our relationship before!” Michael still looked angry, but his voice took on a pleading tone.

“We crossed too many boundaries Michael! We’ve had SEX for God sakes!”

“That can’t be the reason Jeremy! If you want to quit having sex, then fine we won’t have sex anymore! We can talk that out! But I want to hear the REAL reason NOW Jeremy!”

“I don’t want to be around you anymore! IT HURTS!” Jeremy shouted.

Michael looked frozen, they stood there in front of one another in dead silence. Christine had closed the front door and evacuated the room earlier, trying to give them space. She had wanted them to talk in the first place. Now they were, to an extent. At least someone in the house was happy in some form at the moment.

Michael let out a whimper, “Why…why do you not want me around you? What did I do that hurts you so much? What did I do Jeremy? Just tell me and I’ll stop it! I swear I will! Just don’t leave me Jer! Please don’t leave me!” Michael began to breathe harder as he stared at Jeremy. He looked like he was about to explode. Jeremy looked away and stayed silent. Michael walked toward him and put his hands on his shoulders and lightly shook him.

“WHY? Tell me WHY! WHY DON’T YOU WANT TO BE WITH ME ANYMORE? WHY WON’T YOU LOOK ME IN THE EYE ANYMORE? WHAT DID I DO? WHY JEREMY? WHY?” Michael shouted hysterically in Jeremy’s face. He had begun to cry, tears streaming down his red, tan face. Jeremy couldn’t take it anymore and flung himself out of Michael’s grasp, tears continuing to pour out of his eyes as well.

“WHY? WHY DO YOU THINK?! BECAUSE I LOVE YOU! I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU DAMMIT! AND YOU CAN NEVER LOVE ME THE SAME WAY THAT I LOVE YOU! I HATE THAT I LOVE YOU THIS MUCH, BUT I DO! I have to get away from you because if I don’t I’ll want to die if I can’t BE with you! I already wanted to die once, that day you kicked me out after our first night together! I made you pancakes! I was going to confess to you that morning because I thought that you loved me! Had sex with me because YOU LOVED ME! BUT YOU DIDN’T! YOU WANTED ME TO LEAVE SO YOU COULD BE WITH DUSTIN FUCKING KROPP! I was just the second choice to a better option! Do you know that I didn’t feel anything those next two months after that?! Not until I was stuffed in a closet so you could FUCK Dustin!” Jeremy fell on his knees and cried into his hands at Michael’s feet.

The emotions that he held onto for months on end finally came out. Michael could now have a legitimate reason to end their friendship. He had tried to end it on his own terms, but Michael couldn’t even grant him that. He felt a body kneel down in front of him. Christine must have come back in the room to pick up what was left of the scattered remains of his heart. He felt two arms embrace him tightly. The arms were way too long and broad to be Christine’s. He opened his eyes to see the red of Michael’s hoodie.

“You moron…I don’t love Dustin. I never slept with Dustin. The only time we kissed was when you left the damn closet and saw us. You have the worst timing in the world, just so you know. Because the kiss only lasted a few minutes, and you missed the part when I called him Jeremy. Because for those three minutes all I was thinking about was how I wish I was kissing my Jeremy. And how the guy I was holding didn’t feel like my Jeremy. His lips didn’t feel like my Jeremy’s, neither did his hands, or his hair. And his eyes were definitely not my Jeremy’s either. I’m just lucky Dustin was so nice about it, because any other guy would have probably punched me!” Michael chuckled. “Jer, I’m a moron too. I gave up before I even tried. I convinced myself that you wouldn’t ever see me as more than a friend. I attempted to distract myself with a guy I wasn’t even 100% into in the first place just so I could get over you. I realize now that I should have confessed long before anything escalated as far as it did between us. I’m so sorry baby. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was too busy trying to save myself from being hurt, that I didn’t stop to notice I was hurting you along the way. I was being a selfish bastard. I’m saying all this to tell you that I’m in love with you Jeremy. I always have loved you, and always will love you.”

Jeremy felt shocked. Michael loved him, no, he was IN love with him. Jeremy felt his emotions give way. He threw his arms around his neck tightly, and he began to loudly sob into Michael’s hoodie. Michael wrapped his arms around Jeremy’s waste and silently cried into Jeremy’s hair, if the sudden wetness on the top of his head was anything to go by.

A few minutes of crying later, they both heard an exasperated voice behind them.

“Finally! It’s about time!” They both turned to see Christine standing there with her hands on her hips, looking at them from the end of her nose. “Well, come on and get cleaned up, you both look awful. I’ll warm your pancakes up for you.” With that, she left the room to go to the kitchen.

Both boys looked at one another and smiled. Standing up, they both went to go do as their friend instructed.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! It is 3:40 AM and I'm dead! I really wanted to finish this chapter though! I really hope all of you loved it! This isn't the end though. I'll work on more chapters later after I get some sleep...Zzzzzzz...


	20. Explanations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael talks to Jeremy.

 

“I can’t believe you two spent all that time together, but never talked out your feelings! What kind of best friends are you?” Christine asked in disbelief as she shoveled pancakes into her mouth. Michael and Jeremy sat next to each other and bashfully focused on their empty plates. “You two are pieces of work, you know that? Me and Jeremy even had to fake date, just so you could talk to one another! Incredible!” She said with a shake of her head.

            “So, you two weren’t really dating?” Michael asked as he looked at Jeremy. Jeremy shook his head back and forth.

            “No. We thought that it would be a valid excuse for me and you not to continue with what we were doing. And it gave me an excuse not to hang out with you as much,” he said softly, breaking eye contact with Michael’s gaze.

            “I see. I’m sorry you felt that you had to do that. And Chris, I’m sorry about shoving you, I just lose my head when Jeremy is involved I guess,” Michael said as he scratched the back of his neck nervously.

            “You guess huh?” Christine arched an eyebrow and Michael blushed. “It’s okay, I’m not bruised or anything, so it’s all good. I could see where you would think Jeremy and I did something last night, but honestly nothing happened.” Christine finished off her plate and looked at Michael with a soft look.

            “I know, and I believe you. I went overboard,” Michael said as he wrapped an arm around Jeremy’s shoulder. Jeremy leaned into his side. His heart was soaring right now, and had been for the past hour since Michael said he loved him.

            “So, I since I’m so invested in this, I have to ask. What is the deal with you and Dustin? Were you two ever dating?” Christine asked curiously.

            Michael looked at Jeremy and laid his head on his shoulder. “No, we never dated. It’s like I told Jer earlier, Dustin was just a distraction. He was a handsome, nice guy, and saying I had a crush on him was easy to convince people of. I never thought he would even talk to me. I underestimated Jake and Rich being able to get his attention long enough to notice me!” Jeremy arched his neck to look at Michael’s heated face.

            “You sure fooled me, you looked like you were going to freak out every time he was around,” Jeremy said, still skeptical despite the previous events that currently had Michael wrapped around him tightly. Michael let go of him, and turned them to where they were face to face.

            “I blush whenever a cute guy talks to me! The only reason I’m okay with you is because we’ve known each other since we wore diapers!” Jeremy blushed. “I’m serious Jer. Dustin and I are friends, and nothing else. He initiated that one kiss, the one you saw, and I tried to go along with it, but I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I couldn’t quit thinking about how you were just a few feet away, and here I was wasting my time with someone else. I like Dustin, he’s a friend now, and I can’t see the guy romantically at all. He told me that he doesn’t see me like that either. He’s like my brother now, except he doesn’t steal my glasses or gives me noogies when he sees me,” Michael said shaking his head. “Dustin is a really cool guy! He even tried to give me advice about you too! Any other guy would have been pissed at me for ‘leading them on’ or whatever!”

            “It’s fine Michael,” Jeremy said, rubbing his hand through Michael’s hair tenderly. “Dustin told you about our talk the other night huh?” Jeremy stated. Michael nodded.

            “Not because he wanted to. I wanted to know what had happened last night. I don’t remember much except getting drunk, talking to someone about you, and that’s it! Dustin tried to lie and say he took me home. A few things were off though. He doesn’t have a key to my house, I couldn’t figure how he got my car there along with his car, I wasn’t for sure how he knew I slept in the basement when my family was over, I definitely didn’t know how he knew I slept in my underwear. It made sense that you were the one who helped him because only you knew a majority of that stuff! Dustin caved and told me everything. If you knew him, you would know he sucks at lying, almost as bad as you do Jer!” Michael said chuckling.

            “After we hung up, I threw on some random clothes and ran through the snow here. The streets were too icy for my car,” he said sheepishly. Jeremy had been too mad when he had first seen Michael. He hadn’t noticed the dripping wet sweatpants, red hoodie, and Timberline boots that he haphazardly wore. He hadn’t even noticed the mismatched socks he wore. His eyes were bloodshot, his face was dry in some places and oily in others, his hair appeared greasy and askew, and he couldn’t have looked more perfect if he had tried in Jeremy’s eyes.

            There was a small cough on the other side of the table. They both looked away from one another to Christine, who was looking at them with amusement.

            “I’m going to get my stuff around. The roads should be clear by now and my parent’s will be back soon from New York,” she stood up and headed towards Jeremy’s room to change clothes.

            Around twenty minutes later, Christine was pulling out of the driveway to go home. Michael and Jeremy waved goodbye as she drove away. When the car was out of sight, they headed back inside.

            “Well, I know it’s late, but Merry Christmas Jer!” Michael said as he hugged him from behind. Jeremy laughed.

            “You know I’m Jewish, right?”

            “Yeah, well… I got you a gift anyway!” Jeremy hadn’t even thought about it, but he hadn’t gotten a present at the party from Michael. Michael let go of him and ran out to his car. When he got back he had a small palm sized gift in his hand. Jeremy took it from his cold hands. He ripped the wrapping off and opened the plain box. Inside was a patch that said Peace & Love in big black and light blue stitched letters. It was the same patch he had gotten Michael, except his was red and black. Jeremy looked up confused, and when he did Michael was holding up a dark blue hoodie. It was a replica of Michael’s own, except without as many patches.

            “I thought we could get you started with this one. I was surprised when you got the same patch for me. I kind of thought it was fate in some weird way, like soulmates. Then I remembered you were dating Christine, and I freaked out and got drunk. Pretty lame, right?” Michael said with forced laughter.

            Jeremy decreased the space between them and threw his arms around Michael’s neck in a tight embrace.

            “It’s not lame. It’s thoughtful and sweet. Not the getting drunk thing, you could have skipped over that part, but the rest of it was nice. Thank you, I love it,” Jeremy said, and kissed Michael on the cheek. He felt the skin heat up underneath his lips. Jeremy smiled against his skin. Michael must have felt it, because he pulled away and gave Jeremy a mocking look of irritation.

            “You know when you do things like this how I get. It’s not fair,” Michael mumbled.

            “Really? I don’t think I know what you’re talking about,” Jeremy smirked.

            Michael gave a low growl and dropped the hoodie on the floor between them. He wrapped his arms around Jeremy tightly and pressed their lips together. Jeremy smiled against their fused lips, and reciprocated his boyfriend’s kiss.

            _Boyfriend_. That had a nice ring to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's about time these two talked things out! 
> 
> Christine: "Wasn't it your fault they took so long?"  
> Me: "Yeah...well...*cough*...anyway, thanks for the comments and kudos!"


	21. Happy Birthday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The squad celebrates Jeremy's birthday!

          Going back to school in January had been difficult for Jeremy and Michael. When they had left, Jeremy had been dating Christine. When they came back, he was dating Michael. It didn’t look that great on the outside, but those on the inside who knew what had happened were okay with it.

            After Christmas, they both had to confront their friends and tell them everything that had occurred. Of course, they chose to leave out the details, but told them the gist of things. Dustin had even come over to Christine’s house to back them up. Their friends hadn’t been thrilled with how much they had gone through without telling them. The lying that was involved didn’t impress them too much either. Jeremy and Christine both apologized to the group for their deception. They also apologized to Jeremy about pushing Dustin on Michael so much. None of them had realized that it had hurt him as bad as it did. He had forgiven them, of course.

            The next people to talk to were their parents. They were both tired of lying to the important people in their lives. Jeremy and Michael didn’t want to sneak around anymore. Of course, they decided NOT to tell them anything about the sex, pretend significant others, and psychological turmoil they went through.

            They agreed that Jeremy’s dad would be the first parent told, since there was one of him, and Michael’s mom could be a little overbearing. It had been nerve-wracking to be sure, but Jeremy thought that the outcome was kind of anticlimactic.

            “Hey Dad, can me and Michael talk to you about something?” Jeremy asked timidly.

            “Sure son, what’s going on?” His dad asked from the couch. George Isaac Heere was currently watching his favorite crime show. The boys had taken the opportunity to wait for a commercial, so they had his full attention. And maybe he wouldn’t chase them out of the house if he knew his show was going to come back on soon.

            “Mr. Heere, I want to be honest with you. I know you asked me before whether I loved Jeremy or not a while back, and I never really gave you an answer. I’m going to answer now and tell you that I’m in love with your son, and I want your permission to date him,” Michael said boldly. Jeremy was proud of him.

            “Okay, well…I guess you have my permission. I already thought you two were dating anyway so- oh my shows back on!” Mr. Heere looked away and zoned in on the TV again. Michael and Jeremy both looked at one another with surprised looks and walked out of the room, a little more disappointed than relieved.

            Michael’s parents had been more entertaining to say the least.

            “Oh honey! It’s about time you two! I’ve been shipping this since you were little! Baby, go get the camera, we have to commemorate this moment!” Mrs. Mell exclaimed as she hugged them both excitedly.

            “Mom!” Michael cried out, “What do you know about ‘shipping’?! How do you even know that word?”

Michael blushed furiously as she paced around the room vigorously, ignoring him. When Mr. Mell handed her the camera, they spent the next hour taking photos together and smiling till their cheeks hurt.

            Needless to say, their parents were supportive. Which was nice to see compared to how they had seen other kids suffer with parental disapproval.

            The next discussion that needed to be confronted was their sex life. They both agreed that hand-holding and kissing was fine, but the rest needed to be taken slowly. Their relationship had to be fixed, and they had to make up for the time they had lost. Things were going well until school began.

            Michael had begun to take Jeremy to and from school in his car, and held hands with Jeremy wherever they went, catching the attention of everyone at school. Jenna, Chloe, and Brooke tried their best to diffuse ridiculous rumors that ranged from Jeremy two timing Christine and Michael to Michael having seduced Jeremy so he would break up with Christine. Jake and Rich had to threaten a few of their ‘so called friends’ for throwing homosexual slurs at the boys on more than one occasion. Even Christine (in her Godfather persona) threatened a few people to “shut their mouths before they were sewn shut!” Glares and curious looks had been thrown their way for the first two weeks of school, but they stuck together and ignored the negativity for the most part.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

            Winter turned into Spring, and graduation was getting closer. Not only was graduation coming, but so was Jeremy’s 18th birthday. He was the last one in the group to become a legal adult, and he couldn’t wait for it. Mainly it was because he was ready for Michael to quit making jokes about ‘robbing the cradle’ and ‘dating a younger man’, which was not helped by Rich, who was more than happy to encourage him much to Jeremy’s irritation.

            Dating Michael Mell was the most wonderful thing Jeremy had ever experienced in his entire life. He felt like he had won the lottery with how happy he felt. Not much had changed in the way they spent time together. They still played videogames, went to 7-11, and shopped at Spencer’s every so often to pick up their contraband drinks. Yes, not much had changed, except now they kissed, held hands, and snuggled while doing the things they usually did. To Jeremy, it was perfect.

            In mid-April, the squad was sitting at their usual table at lunch. Jeremy’s birthday landed on a Saturday this week, and today was Friday. They were giving their gifts to Jeremy at lunch, since Michael had called dibs on the weekend. Christine had made him a chocolate cake with cream cheese icing, his favorite. The rest of the group had all bought him patches for his hoodie.

            He smiled at the various patches he was given. Especially the one Rich gave him that said, ‘Bi till I die’ and Christine’s custom patch that had his name stitched in various shades of blue. He also liked Chloe’s ‘Drama Geek’ patch too. He was ready to sew all of them on as soon as he got to Michael’s house.

Jeremy was spending Saturday and Sunday at the Mell’s. Michael’s parents were leaving today for a business trip at his dad’s company’s Florida branch. They would be gone till Wednesday this time, but Michael said he didn’t mind considering it gave him some alone time with Jeremy without his mom sneaking her camera in his room or the basement whenever Jeremy came over recently. Michael’s mom was easily their biggest supporter and fan. Their dads simply gave them approving nods and went about their business.

At the end of the school day, Jeremy stood by Michael’s car. He gained various looks from people who walked by him. They ranged from cynical to ‘Awe look! He’s waiting on his boyfriend!’. Jeremy had grown used to the stares, so he ignored them in favor of watching out for Michael. It wasn’t long before he saw a flash of red among the crowd. The red got closer and enveloped him in a tight hug. He responded by wrapping his arms around the other in reciprocation.

After they separated, they both got in the car and drove to Michael’s house. Once there Jeremy got out of the car with his overnight bag and headed to the door, only to be stopped by his boyfriend.

“Hold on! I’ve got to go set things up, it’ll only take a minute!” He said before unlocking the door and running into the house. Jeremy grinned and shook his head. Michael had been doing grand gestures for Jeremy recently to make up for hurting Jeremy. After the fourth bouquet of flowers, and sixth teddy bear, Jeremy had to sit Michael down and explain to him that the gifts weren’t necessary. Jeremy preferred spending an afternoon cuddling and playing videogames rather than receiving numerous gifts. Michael reluctantly stopped, but swore he was going to go all out for Jeremy’s birthday.

True to his word, a minute went by and his enthusiastic boyfriend opened the door.

            “After you my good sir,” he said in a posh British accent. Jeremy chuckled and walked through the door.

            They walked down to the basement after Jeremy had dropped off his stuff in Michael’s room. Jeremy looked around, pleasantly surprised. Michael had created a videogame/movie oasis in the middle of the basement.

There were numerous pillows and comforters surrounding the consoles and DVD player, along with junk food and vintage sodas as far as the eye could see. Not only that, but there was also a lineup of Jeremy’s favorite videogames and movies, presumably for him to choose from. Jeremy couldn’t think of a better present.

He turned to Michael, who looked extremely nervous by the way his shoulders stiffened and face scrunched together as he analyzed Jeremy’s reaction. Jeremy gave him a big smile and hugged him tightly. He felt the other boy soften in his arms.

“I love it. Thank you,” he softly said. Michael hugged him back just as tightly.

“You’re welcome, I was hoping you would!”

They broke a part and Jeremy walked over to the pallet, taking his shoes off in the process. He kneeled over the various games and movies, looking at each one and thinking about which he wanted to do first. The movies won out, because all he wanted to right now was cuddle with is boyfriend and eat junk food. He picked out a B+ scary movie that he and Michael always laughed at together and put it in the DVD player.

Jeremy turned and looked at his boyfriend who was still standing up awkwardly. He smiled and waved him over.

“Come on! I wanna cuddle while we watch it!” Michael grinned and situated himself behind Jeremy. Jeremy laid back on his chest and popped a few pretzels in his mouth as the movie began to play. Michael encircled him with his arms and clung to him. Every time something cheesy happened he could feel Michael’s chest move as he laughed. It made Jeremy feel warm inside.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------

               Kissing Michael had been great before, but now that Jeremy knew Michael loved him, it felt spectacular. Each movement of their lips, every time their tongues rubbed against one another, the slide of their hands on one another’s bodies made Jeremy want to melt into an emotional puddle of desire.

They hadn’t had sex in months, a consensual agreement made between them. But now, Jeremy felt the need to get closer. He had been holding back for over a month and was more than ready to take the next step, but he didn’t know if Michael felt the same. Sure, he could talk to his boyfriend about it, but honestly, he was embarrassed. It had been easier to talk about waiting until they had been officially dating for a while, but talking about doing it again was difficult. When he got the confidence to start the conversation he would begin, but would abruptly stop and change the subject whenever Michael looked at him. He felt like it was a lost cause, which was unfortunate because he was quickly growing tired of climaxing alone with his right hand.

Tonight, however, was going to be the night! Jeremy was determined to bring it up to Michael tonight! The birthday present he wanted more than anything was to wake up next to Michael that morning after a long night of passionate love making! And if that made him sound like a hormonal teenage girl, then so be it!

So, as Jeremy and Michael sat in front of the basement TV watching a B+ movie of Jeremy’s choosing, the younger of the two was trying to figure out how to bring up the topic of sex to his oblivious boyfriend.

           

           

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The lyrics: "If I continue at this rate, all I'll ever date, is my Mac book pro hard drive!"  
> Me: "...and Michael!"


	22. We Made Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'll be honest, this is just smut. Have fun!

 

            The movie had ended, and they had been playing videogames for the past few hours. Jeremy looked down at his watch, the reading was 8:00 PM. He nervously looked over at Michael, who was currently focused on the game. His tongue was stuck in the corner of his mouth as his fingers moved rapidly across his game controller. Jeremy licked his lips.

            He had been trying to figure out a way to bring up the topic of sex, but had come up short for the past 3 hours. Over the course of that time, every little movement of Michael’s was causing him to lose his sanity. He was horny as hell, and that made him irrational. He was better at doing than talking anyway.

            Putting the controller down, Jeremy scooted closer to Michael, who was so engrossed in the game that he didn’t notice the movement. When he was within arms-length, Jeremy leaned over and pressed his lips against his boyfriend’s cheek.

            Michael jumped in surprise and looked over at him in shock. Jeremy ignored the look and continued to kiss his cheeks, forehead, chin, and then finally his lips. Jeremy put a little bit more pressure on Michael’s lips and licked the seam of his mouth. Michael groaned and opened his mouth for Jeremy to enter, dropping his controller in favor of pulling Jeremy in closer to him. Jeremy smiled against their lips in triumph.

             Michael pulled Jeremy onto his lap without breaking their kiss. Jeremy felt his spine tingle in anticipation as he felt Michael’s hardness underneath him. In his excitement, he ground his hips down against it. Michael growled and pulled him tightly to him, vigorously sucking on Jeremy’s tongue. Jeremy groaned and wiggled his hips more in response, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend’s neck tightly.

Michael pushed them back onto the pallet on the floor, quickly grabbing a pillow and shoving it underneath Jeremy’s head. Slightly shifting his hips, he allowed Michael to fit in easily between his legs. Jeremy sighed in relief at the pressure of Michael’s weight on top of him. It had been too long since he had felt this intimately close to Michael.  

Their mouths remained fused together as Jeremy ground his hips up. Michael gasped against his mouth and ground back down, causing the sweet friction that Jeremy craved. Jeremy whimpered, unwrapping his arms from Michael’s neck and tugging at his pants instead.

Michael separated their mouths with a resounding pop. Looking at Jeremy hesitantly, he shook his head, as if attempting to clearing it.

            “We have to stop Jer,” he said huskily. Jeremy frowned.

            “Come on Michael, please,” Jeremy whined, grinding his hips against Michael’s, causing the other boy to wince.

            “No, you aren’t thinking clearly,” he replied, getting up.

            “No!” Jeremy said as he grabbed his waist and pulled him down on top of him again.

            “Jeremy! What are you doing?!”

            “Iwanttohavesex!” Jeremy said in a garbled rush.

            “Huh?” Michael asked.

            “I said, I want to have sex! Now!” Jeremy whined again, only at a slower rate.

            Michael sighed, looking at the boy underneath him.

            “I thought we wanted to wait a little while Jeremy?”

            “A little while? Michael, it’s been months! I’ve been ready for over a month!”

            Michael looked away from him and cast his eyes towards the TV.

            “Michael, what’s wrong?” Jeremy asked, as he pushed a stray lock of black hair away from his boyfriend’s face.

            “It’s just…I don’t want you to think the only reason I’m with you is for sex, Jeremy. Our relationship was based on that before. I don’t want to screw up what we have right now,” Michael said, snuggling into Jeremy’s chest and obscuring his face.

            “Oh Mikey… I’ll admit, we didn’t have the healthiest relationship for a few months, but I wouldn’t go as far as to say our ENTIRE relationship was based on that. I don’t know if you remember, but I did say I’ve been in love with you for a lot longer than those 3 months,” Jeremy said smiling.

            “Yeah, but-,” Michael started.

            “AND you said you have always loved me, right? Were you being serious, or did you lie to me? Are you with me just for the sex?” Jeremy asked with a shaky voice. Michael looked up, horrified.

            “Jeremy! That isn’t true! I was being serious when I said I loved you. I loved you at first sight!” Michael said loudly, hugging Jeremy tightly. Jeremy smiled.

            “Okay, then it’s fine. I want this…and I know you do too,” Jeremy smirked, rubbing against Michael’s semi with his hips. Michael gave a grunt and glared at Jeremy.

            “Jeremy! Don’t scare me like that! I thought you were upset!”

            “I had to, or else you would have gotten all self-depreciating on me. And I believe that’s my job!” Jeremy said teasingly.

            Michael sighed and his face softened as he gazed at Jeremy. He then stretched his neck toward his face and gave him a soft peck on the lips.

            “Fine. You win, but you asked for it. You’re not the only one who’s been frustrated,” Michael smiled, then began to rapidly thrust against Jeremy.

            “Ahh!” Jeremy moaned at the unexpected onslaught. When he gained his bearings again he began to thrust upward to meet Michael, causing the other to groan. Jeremy wrapped his arms around his neck and pulled him toward his face to smash their lips together.

            Pretty soon they were at the point they were before the previous interruption. Jeremy began to feel warm, and felt sweat form across his brow. He unwrapped his arms from Michael’s neck and yanked his cardigan off. He separated their mouths to pull his shirt off. As soon as he did Michael latched onto his neck and began sucking on it vigorously. Jeremy gasped, grabbing onto his hoodie and pulling it up. Michael lifted his head up and took off his hoodie and under shirt in one pull. Jeremy sat up to follow him, placing open-mouthed kisses all over his chest and neck.

            Michael put his hands on his jeans and unbuttoned them, pulling them down as Jeremy continued his ministrations. Gently, he pushed Jeremy back down and pulled Jeremy’s jeans off, throwing them across the room in the process. Jeremy laughed.

            “Was that really necessary?”

            Michael arched an eyebrow, and bent down, placing lingering kisses all the way down until he reached Jeremy’s clothed erection. Jeremy was gasping for air as Michael gripped his boxers and discarded them with his other clothes.

The cool air hit his member, softening it until Michael engulfed it in his warm mouth. Jeremy shrieked at the feeling, arching his back to push himself further inward. Gagging, Michael pulled back after one last hard suck, causing Jeremy to moan.

            Rubbing his own shaft, Michael’s face turned irritated. Jeremy frowned.

            “W-what’s w-wrong?” he panted.

            “I need to go upstairs and get lube and a condom,” Michael muttered huskily.

            “Hur-ry u-up!” They really hadn’t been prepared for this.

            Michael stood up and ran up the stairs naked. He mentally shuttered at what this moment reminded him of. If Dustin Kropp randomly showed up now, Jeremy was leaving and never having sex with Michael again.

            He heard stomps coming from the ceiling. Jeremy turned to see Michael taking two steps at a time as he ran down the stairs with lube and condoms in hand. Jeremy raised his eyebrows as he took in the amount of condoms he had brought. Michael shrugged.

            “You never know!” Jeremy turned to look at the handful of condoms.

            “Yeah…no…”.

            Michael gave a sheepish smile and stroked both of their members together. Jeremy hummed in pleasure at the friction and warmth. He then ceased his ministrations and popped open the bottle of lube and rolled one of the condoms on his dick. Finally, he squeezed a generous amount in his hand and slicked his shaft thoroughly.

            When he was done, he looked at Jeremy.

            “Okay babe, you ready?” he asked huskily. His brown eyes were black as he stared Jeremy down lustfully.

            “Y-yeah...,” Jeremy replied. He was already a wreck, and they hadn’t even connected yet.

            Michael nodded and rubbed lubricant along Jeremy’s hole, massaging slowly. Jeremy heard himself whimper at the tingling feeling it elicited. Michael entered the first finger in gradually until it reached the knuckle. He stroked inside, bending his finger, searching until Jeremy arched his back and gave a high pitched keening noise. Michael smirked and gently added in another finger, stretching the area in a scissoring motion. Jeremy groaned in response.

            After pushing in a third, Jeremy was more than ready for him.

            “C-come on!” Jeremy whined. Michael nodded and slipped his fingers out. He then lined his shaft up and pressed forward. Jeremy was relieved to have started playing with his ass during masturbation. It saved a lot of prep time for the real thing.

            Michael entered him with a grunt. Jeremy arched his back to help him along until he made it all the way in. The familiar noises that Jeremy made during sex were back with twice the volume. It had been way too long since he had sex with Michael. He already felt less frustrated and they hadn’t even begun yet.

            Jeremy adjusted to Michael easily. “Y-you can g-go I’m r-ready.”

            Michael began to thrust at a slow and steady pace. A few moments passed and Jeremy thought he was going to die if they didn’t start hard core fucking soon.

            “Mikey, p-please. G-go fas-faster!” Jeremy screeched. Michael looked surprised, but followed his demand.

            Michael grabbed on to his hips and drew back until his tip was almost out of Jeremy, then he quickly thrusted in, causing Jeremy to scream. Michael stopped and looked at Jeremy in alarm.

            “N-no keep go-going! I’m f-fine!” he panted, tightening himself around him.

            “Fuck!” Michael grunted at the feeling and continue to ram in and out of Jeremy without hesitation. Jeremy felt himself melting into Michael. It felt incredible, especially since it had been so long since the last time they had sex.

            “Mikey! Damn! Ah! Fuck!” Jeremy shouted as he was thrusted into over and over again. He began to shout Michael’s name like a mantra as he felt his orgasm coming.

            “Jer! Oh!” Michael groaned. Jeremy could feel Michael’s thrusts becoming erratic and jerky as he got closer to his own climax. Michael changed the angle of his hips slightly, hitting Jeremy in just the right spot, causing him to shoot thick shots of cum without warning.

            “MICHAEL!” He shouted. A few more thrusts later Michael followed.

            “Shit!” Michael shuttered, he laid still for a minute, then pulled out.  

            “God babe. I love you so much,” Michael muttered as he tenderly kissed his face all over. Jeremy softly smiled and kissed him back, meeting his lips. When they separated Michael rolled off Jeremy and laid on his side next to him.

            They both rested a few minutes side by side in comfortable silence. It was after they both began to yawn that Michael grabbed one of the comforters that made up the pallet underneath and threw it over them. Jeremy moved over so they could share the pillow he was currently laying on.

            Jeremy smiled as he felt Michael’s arms wrap around him. Jeremy snuggled into the embrace. A few moments later, he heard Michael’s breaths even out and deepen. Jeremy opened his eyes to see Michael drooling next to him.

            He chuckled, wiping off the drool with his thumb. Leaning toward his face he brushed his lips against his boyfriend’s.

            “I love you, Mikey,” he softly said. He was just about to fall asleep when he heard a voice whisper.

            “I love you too Jeremy.”

            Before he fell asleep Jeremy had one last thought.

            _We made love._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea what to put in this note. I guess I'll just go with "I hope you enjoyed the smut, even if I'm bad at it."


	23. Nostalgia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Little Michael and Jeremy are back!

 

                       “So, how long have you loved me?” Michael asked while he slowly ran his fingers through Jeremy’s bed head. The other hand was preoccupied with massaging Jeremy’s lower back.

Jeremy felt his face heat up at the question. His head was currently laying on Michael’s bare chest with his arms wrapped around Michael’s waist.

“Well, I think it was the day you saved me from those bullies back when we were 7.”

“Oh, well that doesn’t narrow it down very much. If I remember right you were bullied all the time,” Michael said snickering. Jeremy pulled one of his arms out from under Michael and gave him a light smack on the arm.

“Hush… it was the day after our first-grade picture day. I re-wore that new blue polo shirt my mom got me for the pictures because I thought it made me look like a grown up. The other kids thought it was still dirty, so they pushed me and started throwing dirt on me,” Jeremy felt his face begin to get warmer at the admission.

“Oh! I remember that day! It was that long ago huh?” Michael’s voice held a note of surprise.

“Yeah, 10 years ago…about 11 now,” Jeremy mumbled while nuzzling into Michael’s neck.

“I’ve loved you longer though,” Michael admitted, and started to chuckle, “I mean, I even proposed!”

Jeremy pushed himself off his boyfriend and looked at him in shock. “There’s no way!”

“No, I’m serious! I even have video evidence!” Michael said while getting out of bed. He threw on his underwear and t-shirt, waving at Jeremy to follow him, and noticed the once over Jeremy gave him.

“Later Jer!” he said winking at him. Jeremy’s face heated up as Michael ran out of the basement to the living room where the Mell’s kept the home videos. Jeremy stood up, wincing slightly at how sore he felt. Throwing on his underwear and t-shirt, he followed Michael up the stairs.

He found Michael riffling through a bunch of VHS tapes. Sitting down beside him, he started to look at the different titles that were written on the tapes: _Michael’s First Birthday, Antonio and Maria’s Wedding, Michael Plays the Drums_ , and so on.

“Found it!” Michael said with a cry of triumph! The tape said _Michael and Jeremy’s Play Dates._

“Your mom records everything doesn’t she?” Jeremy said in amusement.

“Yeah, it’s gotten worse with the invention of the smartphone and GoPro,” he said as he popped in the VHS tape.

A screen of static soon revealed small versions of Jeremy and Michael playing with mega-blocks. The current Michael began to fast forward through various play dates until he stopped on them at four-years-old, according to the date in the corner of the screen.

Jeremy and Michael were playing in the Mell’s living room with different toy trucks and cars. Jeremy was sputtering out engine noises as he raced a dumpster truck around in a circle. Michael sat beside him trying to choose between a fire truck and a green monster truck. The green monster truck won out.

Michael’s mom could be heard behind the camera talking to one of the other adults in the room, supposedly Jeremy’s mom based on the conversation the camera picked up.

“I swear Samantha! He said the most adorable thing the other day! Just listen!” Mrs. Mell said with a giggle as she zoomed in on little Jeremy and Michael.

“Mikey!” Michael looked over at his mom as he continued to push his truck back and forth beside Jeremy’s.

“Can you tell me who you are going to marry when you get big?” Michael returned his mom’s amused voice with a look of frustration.

“Mommy! I alweady told you yestewday!” Michael whined.

“Yes, you did, but you haven’t told Jeremy’s mommy and daddy!” Unperturbed by her son’s displeasure, she continued to probe the young boy.

Michael’s tiny face scrunched up in thought, then realizing his mom wasn’t giving up anytime soon, stood up and grabbed a hold of Jeremy’s hand.

“Come on Gewmy!” Michael helped Jeremy stand up and led him by the hand closer to the camera.

Older Jeremy almost laughed at little Michael’s attempt at his name. He had forgotten that while Michael could talk well for a four-year-old, he couldn’t say Jeremy’s name right until they were about six, pronouncing his ‘r’s’ had developed better around age five. He turned his attention back to the video.

 “Okay, I’m gonna say it one mow time! So, listen okay?” Michael said sternly to the camera.

Mrs. Mell giggled, “Alright sweetie, we’re listening.”

“I’m gonna mawy Gewmy when we get big like mommy and daddy!”

Mrs. Mell laughed, “Are you sure? Have you asked Jeremy if he wanted to get married?”

Michael looked perturbed and scrunched his face up. It was clear he hadn’t figured Jeremy’s consent into his plan. He then turned to Jeremy with a serious look on his face. Jeremy had been looking at the camera with curiosity, but then turned his head to look at Michael.

“Germy, will ya mawy me?”

Jeremy stood there, clearly unsure of what was being asked. Michael looked like whatever was said was either going to make or break him, which was a funny look for a little kid to have in the first place.

After hesitating for a minute, Jeremy finally smiled and nodded his head vigorously. Jeremy chose not to talk a lot when he was younger, Michael did most of the talking for them both anyway. Michael gave a huge smile and looked back at his mom.

“He said yep!” Mrs. Mell continued to giggle behind the camera, and Jeremy could hear an argument that sounded suspiciously like his parents.

“George...you can’t…boys…impression…able!”

“Sam…calm…young!”

Little Michael then put his arms around Jeremy in a hug and proceeded to kiss him chastely on the cheek. Jeremy laughed at his friend’s antics and hugged him back, returning the kiss.

 “O-okay, Michael honey, I think that’s enough. Jeremy, you aren’t supposed to kiss little boys!” Jeremy’s mom showed up on the screen as she picked up Jeremy and reprimanded him. Jeremy’s dad then showed up and ran his hand through Jeremy’s hair.  

“Hey buddy, you aren’t supposed to kiss boys or girls, not for a long time at least,” Jeremy’s dad said, voice clearly amused, with a hint of discomfort. His eyes kept darting over to his frantic wife’s face.

Jeremy, who looked like he was about to cry before, started to smile at his dad. His mom didn’t look too pleased at his dad’s additional words, but chose to ignore him in favor of handing Jeremy to his dad and packing up his toys.

Little Michael started to panic as he noticed what Mrs. Heere was doing.

“Is Gewmy leaving? Mommy, I don’t want Gewmy to go!” He began to pull on Mr. Heere’s pant leg with one hand while the other was reaching up for Jeremy, who was currently still in his dad’s arms.

“Hey bud, it’s alright, you’ll get to see Jeremy again soon okay? You two have preschool tomorrow.” Mr. Heere let Jeremy down to let the two boys hug it out before he picked up Jeremy again. The camera was shut off after Mrs. Mell started to say something that sounded like an apology.

“See I told you! I loved you longer than you loved me,” an older Michael Mell gloated beside an older Jeremy Heere. Jeremy rolled his eyes and playfully shoved his boyfriend onto his side.

“I can’t believe I don’t remember that! I mean, I know we were 4, but that was kind of a big moment!” Jeremy couldn’t believe how much he had been pining over this guy when they were practically engaged since they were 4. What the hell?! He wanted all his tears back and then some!

“Don’t feel too bad. I didn’t even remember until my mom started to feel nostalgic a couple of years ago and re-watched all of our old tapes.” Michael leaned over and gave a kiss, not unlike the one in the video, on Jeremy’s cheek.

Jeremy looked at the now static filled screen and gave a sigh.

“I don’t remember my mom being homophobic either…,” Jeremy glared at the screen.

“Yeah… when I mentioned it to my mom she said you weren’t allowed to come over for another play date for like 3 months after that,” Michael said as he rubbed the back of his head. He turned away, red in the face…he looked…nervous.

“Another reason not to miss her then. If she thought a kiss on the cheek was bad, she really wouldn’t like what we do together now,” Jeremy said chuckling while a heated blush spread over his face, ignoring his boyfriend’s strange behavior.

He looked over at Michael, who began to wiggle his eyebrows. The look from a moment before was nowhere to be seen.

“Dude, are you trying to seduce me with your eyebrows?” Jeremy smiled, barely containing his laugh.

“No, I thought my hot body and charismatic charm would be enough. If I added the eyebrows I’m afraid I would give you a heart attack,” he replied in a serious tone.

Jeremy gave him a blank stare. He then proceeded to fall over and clench a hand over his heart.

“Man, I think it’s happening. My heart…just can’t take…the…hot…ness…ugh!” Jeremy closed his eyes and went limp.

“Dude, you’re hilarious, now get up so we can go make some pancakes. I’m starving!”

Jeremy continued to play opossum as he heard Michael stand up.

“Okay, when you’re ready to eat you know where to find me,” Michael said with exasperation.

Jeremy continued to lay there as he heard his boyfriend walk off. What felt like a few minutes later, he felt himself start to doze off when he felt a puff of hot air against his neck. He jumped in surprise and flicked his eyes open. He came face to face with Michael Mell. Michael gave him a smirk as he pressed his lips to Jeremy’s. He proceeded to slide his lips to Jeremy’s neck and began slowly sucking. Jeremy hummed.

“Michael, quit. I’m tired…,” he yawned. Michael released his neck.

“Then come on and eat then!” He said standing and helped pull Jeremy up on his feet. The nervous look was back.

“Fiiiiiinnnne!” Jeremy dramatically groaned. Michael rolled his eyes and led the way to the kitchen. He waited for Michael to turn around before giving his back a concerned look.

When they finished, Jeremy stood up and volunteered to clean the dishes.

            “You know you don’t have to, right? I can do it later,” Michael said, still sitting as Jeremy grabbed the empty plates and cups.

            “Dude, I grew up in this house with you, I thought ‘su casa es mi casa?’” Jeremy asked. Michael sighed in response. Jeremy turned and headed for the sink.

            As he was finishing up, he felt a presence behind him. He smiled.

            “Michael, what are you doing?” he asked, putting the clean dishes on the dry rack.

            “Jeremy, turn around.” Michael’s voice sounded nervous. Jeremy turned and froze.

            Behind him was Michael, on one knee with a small black box cupped in his hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If y'all have ever watched Star vs the Forces of Evil: "Surprise!"  
> I should be done with this in one more chapter. Hope y'all have enjoyed it!


	24. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael and Jeremy's journey begins.

Jeremy stared at Michael in surprise. Michael’s face was tomato red, and he looked like he was about to throw up. His mind was blank.

            “M-m-michael?” Jeremy stuttered. Michael visibly swallowed, and looked like he was shaking, if his hands were any indication.

            “J-jeremy…I know this is sudden, and random. I know we’re only 18 and about to go to college. And I know we don’t have jobs or a penny to our names right now. However, I do know one thing, and that is I don’t want to be separated anymore. Not by stupid misunderstandings, or other people, or dorm assignments, or anything else! I’ve already told you that I’ve loved you ever since we met when we were 3. I may not have known what I was feeling at the time, but I know now that it was love. I can’t imagine spending my life with anyone else. Hell, I don’t want to! I’ve thought about this for a few months now. We can’t have kids, obviously, maybe one day, but not now. And we can get housing too instead of dorms if we…y’know…and…gosh Jer…I love you so much and I’ll spend every day of our lives showing you. I’m telling you all of this to ask, Jeremy, will you marry me at the end of this summer?” Michael opened the box, revealing a thick silver band.

            Jeremy felt his face heat up. It’s true he loved Michael. Gosh, he had loved him for years. He couldn’t imagine being with anyone else either. Marriage though?! Could he do that? Could THEY do that? There was no going back if they fought. It could turn out as bad as his parents’ marriage had been. Jeremy felt scared, like he couldn’t breathe. Taking a deep breath, he focused on Michael’s nervous, sweaty face that was losing hope each second Jeremy took to think through this.

            Looking in to Michael’s dark brown eyes suddenly, all of Jeremy’s doubts and fears began to melt away. They say that the eyes are the windows to the soul, but looking in his eyes, Jeremy saw the path to his future. He had known this guy for 14 years of his life, and no matter what had happened between, they had gotten through it. They had been through so much worse than what most married couples face! A psychotic floppy disk that almost took over the entire student body, an unhealthy sexual relationship, trying, and failing to get over the other by trying to be with other people, and now marriage? Bring it on!

            Michael looked ready to run after Jeremy had stood there silently for over 3 minutes. He started to get up before Jeremy kneeled with him and grabbed the box from Michael’s hands. He gave a smile and nodded.

            “W-what does that mean?! Did you just say ‘yes’?!” Michael looked like he was about to faint. Jeremy gave him a soft smile and cupped Michael’s face with his hands.

            “Yes Mikey, I’ll marry you.”

            Michael looked like a fish that was struggling for air. His eyes were wide as saucers. Jeremy thought he had broken him when he lurched forward and hugged him tightly to his chest. Jeremy wrapped his arms around him.

            “I can’t believe you said yes!” Michael exclaimed. “You know you can’t take it back now! You are stuck with me buddy!”

            “Funny, I thought I already was before you proposed?” Jeremy chuckled.

            “Ha! ha! Hilarious!” Michael spat back sarcastically while pulling back away from him.

            “Check it out,” Michael said, removing the band from the box. It looked like a plain silver band, which was okay with Jeremy. He liked the simplicity of it. On closer inspection, however, he saw there was an inscription inside.

            _Player 2. Because life is a two-player game._

Jeremy teared up. “You are so cheesy it’s adorable!” he said as Michael slid the ring on his finger. Michael pulled an identical silver band from his pocket. It said the same thing, except his said _Player 1._ Michael let Jeremy slide the ring onto his finger. Jeremy then looked up at him with a false look of irritation.

            “I thought I was Player 1?”

            “We agreed, you could call dibs when you beat me at Mario Kart, but since that will never happen, you will forever be the Player 2 to my Player 1,” Michael explained while pushing up his glasses.

            “That’s it. Wedding is off,” Jeremy said smiling as he began to stand up.

            “Oh no ya don’t! You are stuck with me, remember?” Michael grabbed Jeremy’s arm and pulled him to the floor with him. Jeremy began to laugh as Michael tickled his ribs.

            Yeah, he could definitely spend the rest of his life with this guy.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

            Jeremy nervously straightened the navy-blue tie for the tenth time in the last five minutes. He checked his slicked back hair and finely pressed suit for the eighth time, not that he was keeping track or anything. He settled on pacing the floor of his mostly boxed up bedroom, trying not to melt into a puddle of anxiety.

            It had been a busy three months. Between planning a wedding, getting ready for college, and graduating high school, Jeremy and Michael hadn’t had a lot of time to spend with one another lately. Especially since Christine fucking Canigula decreed that they could not see each one day before the wedding. Even their cell phones had been confiscated. _Your parents have phones, right? You’ll live without them until after the ceremony!_

Damn her! If Michael were here right now he would be calming Jeremy down. Instead, Jeremy was forced to wait in silence by himself. He hadn’t seen Michael in over a day, and he was feeling the withdrawals. When he saw Michael, it would be in front of a bunch of family and friends, not a private, intimate moment.

            It wasn’t that he was having second thoughts. He was more than ready to marry the love of his life! It was the thought of all the people staring at them while they were doing it that freaked him out. He had to remember, not everyone they invited would be attending.

            Michael’s family was taking up most of the Heere’s backyard right now. There would have been more if it wasn’t for the cost of airline tickets. Most of Jeremy’s family would not be attending. Not because of the airlines, but just for the fact that they refused to show. Being a part of a primarily strict Jewish family and having a homosexual wedding did not mix well together. Jeremy had to give it up for a few cousins and an estranged aunt, they were in attendance despite the backlash they were receiving from their other relatives.

            Michael had initially felt guilty for the negativity sent Jeremy’s way. He had come to Michael’s house crying one night after a very heated discussion with his uncle. Jeremy had told him it couldn’t be helped; his family was entitled to their own views. They could live their lives and he would live his, and that was that. He wouldn’t apologize for loving Michael, so Michael shouldn’t either. Besides, the only family member he truly wanted there more than anyone was his dad, who had taken the news of his son’s engagement relatively well.

            When Jeremy had told him, he was surprised. He hadn’t expected it to be so soon, and began to ask the boys their plans for the future. Despite being a divorcee, George Heere wanted to make sure they knew what marriage entailed and how it would affect them both while they were in school. He just wanted them to be happy, and not jump into anything too quickly. After reassuring his dad, and Michael having a private discussion with him, they were given George’s blessing.

            Michael’s parents had been the same. Okay, Michael’s dad had been the same. Maria Mell had shrieked in delight and began planning out the wedding then and there. Antonio Mell managed to quiet his wife down long enough to go over the same topics Jeremy’s dad had. Suffice it to say, their blessings were obtained without conflict.

            Jeremy had tried to contact his mother. It was still a tender subject for him, but he wanted to at least let her know about his engagement, even if she wouldn’t come. After a few calls that went unanswered, and countless emails that became lost to cyberspace, Jeremy gave up. After watching that childhood video with Michael, Jeremy probably wouldn’t have liked what she had to say anyway.

            Michael and Jeremy had settled on a small (despite Michael’s huge family) wedding in the Heere’s big backyard. The squad had worked tirelessly to pull out the weeds and mow the thick grass that had accumulated over the years, but they had done it. Michael’s mom had outdone herself with obtaining everything else. The flowers, the chairs, the tables, the lights, etc. all were credited to Maria ( _Call me Maria,_ _aking anak, we are going to be family soon!)._ Jeremy’s father had gotten them suits for the occasion ( _Maria took over everything else, she’ll only let me do this much._ ), and both he and Michael were appreciative.

            They had decided to tell their families first, for obvious reasons, but telling their friends was another matter entirely. They had gone back to school that Monday with their rings on. The first one to notice was Chloe.

            “What the hell are those?!” she asked. Jeremy had never seen her so shocked.

            “Are those what I think they are?!” Christine hysterically shrieked while bouncing up and down.

            “Dude! No way!” Rich and Jake exclaimed simultaneously.

            “Promise rings?” Jenna asked with a raised brow.

            “Engagement rings?” Brooke gushingly asked. Michael blushed furiously at that, causing the others to erupt in cheers and rapid-fire questions. It had taken a while, but Jeremy and Michael finally calmed them down long enough to explain. They had caused quite a scene in the halls that day.

            The thought of his friends brought him back to the present. They were down in the yard right now. He felt his anxiety begin to stir again, when the door opened. Christine walked in with a yellow sundress on and a curled pony tail flopping behind her.

She and Maria had become fast friends during the planning of the wedding. Jeremy couldn’t catch up with their conversations as they sat around a table discussing wedding cakes and flowers. Jeremy didn’t understand the point of it all. He just wanted to marry Michael. On the other hand, he wasn’t stupid. If he told the women what he really thought, Michael would be a widower before they even got to walk down the aisle. So, he just nodded along with everything they said while Michael snacked on Doritos beside him.

“You ready Jer?” she asked sweetly. He nodded nervously as she grabbed his arm and led him out of the room. Jeremy took deep breaths as they walked down the stairs and towards the back door of the house. He heard a choked gasp and looked up.

Michael stood there with his hair smoothed back out of his eyes. His eyes were the first things Jeremy noticed because they weren’t hidden behind his usual thick-framed glasses. Maria or Christine, or both, must have forced him to wear contacts. His black suit matched Jeremy’s except he wore a dark red tie with a gray button up shirt. He looked handsome. They had skipped prom both years because of Michael’s anxiety, now Jeremy wished they hadn’t if it meant seeing Michael get dressed up like this.

Jeremy must not look the sweaty mess he felt that he was by the way Michael was looking at him in awe. Jeremy smiled as he walked out of Christine’s grasp and up next to Michael, interlocking their arms. He felt his anxiety fly out the window. Michael’s presence calmed him down instantly.

“Hey, have you been waiting long?” Jeremy asked. Michael smiled.

“No, just got here. You come here often?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Trying to give me another heart attack?” Jeremy asked playfully. Michael shrugged, chuckling softly.

“Alright you two! You guys can flirt at the reception. We have the ceremony to get to!” Christine said behind them, shoving them gently toward the door.

“Sheesh Christine, the ceremony is right there, it’s not like we have a set schedule anyway,” Michael said, a terrible mistake on his part.

“Michael Mell, me and your mother have been planning this express wedding for months! Show some gratitude and listen to me! We do have a schedule. A schedule meticulously planned by Maria and me, and if you ruin it…I’ll ruin your face!” she said in a scary tone.

Michael visibly flinched as she walked out the door to prepare the wedding march.

“This isn’t our wedding Jer, it’s my mom’s and Christine’s!” Michael exclaimed. Jeremy mutely nodded. His anxiety was flaring again. He felt Michael squeeze his hand. Jeremy looked over at him.

“Hey, I’m here. Two-player game, right?” he asked softly. Jeremy took a deep breath and nodded.

“Yeah, it’s a two-player game.” He wanted to lean over and kiss him, but he was afraid Christine would catch him and eat him alive, so he refrained.

Speak of the devil, and he shall appear. Christine walked in with music trailing behind her.

“Okay, we’re ready!” She opened the door for them and stepped aside.

Both boys gave one last reassuring look towards the other before they walked out into the sunlight.

________________________________________________________________________________

            The reception was a lot bigger than Jeremy expected. Most of the guests were in the yard dancing away to various songs Rich and Jake picked out, the only job Christine allowed them to have. The two said boys were in the middle of a ring of middle-aged Filipino women busting moves that Jeremy had never seen before. And would hopefully never see again.

            Michael was watching them beside one of his aunts laughing hysterically at their antics. Chloe and Brooke were by the buffet table sampling the various Filipino dishes that Michael’s family had brought. Jenna was talking to one of Michael’s many cousins, from the looks of it they were hitting it off pretty well considering how much they were leaning towards one another as they talked. Christine was with Maria, making sure everything went smoothly. Jeremy wished she would take a break and let loose.

            He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned to see Dustin Kropp in a pair of black slacks and a tucked in blue button-down shirt. He looked nice.

            “Hey! How’re you doing?” Jeremy asked. He could safely say that he and Dustin were friends now. Despite what Jeremy had gone through before, he never blamed the guy for anything. What was there to blame him for? Being too handsome, or too perfect? Yeah, Jeremy could easily tell anyone who would listen that Dustin Kropp was as perfect to a human being as you could get. No lie. He could say that now that he knew the guy personally.

            “I’m good! The wedding was nice. I’m happy for you guys,” he said with a smile.

            “Thanks, we’re glad you could make it. I was worried the team would call you in early.” Dustin had been drafted into a well-known college basketball team, he also had won a full ride scholarship too. As hard as he worked, he deserved it.

            “They tried, but I wouldn’t have missed this for anything. I had to see you guy’s wedding, especially since I take 50% of the credit for getting you two together,” he jokingly said. Jeremy laughed.

            “Honestly, you did play a huge part in it. I wasn’t happy about it at the time, but now, I can say that I’m really thankful that you showed up when you did. At the rate me and Michael were going, we would have confessed to each other on our deathbeds instead of last year,” Jeremy said looking at him with a soft smile. Dustin chuckled.

            “Well, I’m glad I was of service then,” Dustin said as he bowed. Jeremy shook his head, smiling. He began to say something when he noticed Dustin’s face turn bright red, his mouth partially open in shock. Jeremy frowned and saw two hands before they covered his eyes.

            “Guess who?” A familiar voice asked. Jeremy’s smile widened.

            “Abe!” Jeremy exclaimed, taking the hands off his eyes as he turned towards his older cousin. The two embraced, then separated.

            “Correct! Look at you all grown up and married! And to Michael! I can’t say I’m surprised though, the kid wouldn’t shut up about marrying you when we were younger!” Abe said laughing. Jeremy turned red.

            “That’s what everyone keeps telling me NOW. I’m glad no one thought to tell me that months ago!” Jeremy said crankily. He crossed his arms and began to pout. Then, he felt a pair of familiar arms wrap around his waist. After kissing him on the cheek, Michael looked at Abe in a mock glare.

            “Why are upsetting my husband on our wedding day Abe? If you keep it up I’ll have to sick my watchdogs on you,” he teased, nodding towards his mom and Christine. Abe flinched.

            “Yeah, hard pass. I was just telling Jeremy about how you used to talk about marrying him all the time when we were younger. You even thought I was competition! One time-,”

            “OKAY! That’s enough of that!” Michael interrupted. He turned his attention to Dustin. “Hey man! Glad you could make it!” he directed at Dustin.

            Still red, Dustin looked at Michael and smiled. “Yeah, I was telling Jeremy that I wouldn’t have missed it! If you’ll excuse me I’m going to grab some punch,” he said and practically ran away. Michael frowned in confusion. Jeremy watched after him, a knowing grin on his face.

            “Bummer, I wanted to introduce you to him!” Michael said looking over at Abe. “He’s a new friend. Great guy!” Abe smiled and politely excused himself. When Abe walked away to talk to his dad, Jeremy took Michael to the side.

            “What’s up babe?” Michael asked confused. Jeremy smirked.

            “Did you notice anything weird about Dustin when you walked up?”

            “Yeah, he was all red, and he’s NEVER red. I swear the guy doesn’t even sweat. Then he ran off like an axe murderer was after him,” Michael’s frown deepened. Jeremy’s smirk grew into a smile.

            “Y’know, he was normal until Abe showed up!” Michael blinked and looked over at Jeremy’s cousin.

            Abe was six years older than them. Christine had been right when she said he and Jeremy favored one another. They both shared the same light blue eyes and angular features, except Jeremy’s were slightly softer. Both were lanky and tall, except Abe had more bulk, a trait Jeremy was hoping would show up as he got older. Abe had wavy dark brown hair that slightly curled on the ends, unlike Jeremy’s curlier, light brown hair. Their personalities, however, were further off from one another. Abe was more outgoing and charismatic. He had the confidence that Jeremy lacked. Abe had been popular in high school, and Jeremy was only friends with popular people. There were significant differences, but they both got along well. They didn’t see one another as much since Abe had left to earn a degree in marketing and a minor in business. The Hot Pocket job was a means to an end for his cousin. He really wanted to work on marketing for bigger labels than a convenient lunch snack brand. And one day he would, Abe was persistent when he wanted something.

            Michael turned to look at Jeremy with worry in his eyes.

            “I’m happy to see someone get Dustin’s attention, but do you know if Abe is even interested in men?” Michael asked in a concerned voice. Jeremy looked over at his cousin, who was currently talking to his father.

            “I don’t know. We’ve never talked about it before. I’ll go ask!” Jeremy said, walking out of Michael’s arms in the process. Michael yanked him back to him.

            “What do you think you’re doing?! You don’t just go walk up to someone and ask them their sexual preferences!”

            “Abe isn’t ‘someone’, he’s my cousin! He’s heard me ask him weird stuff before,” Jeremy said dismissively. Michael gave an aggravated sigh, letting Jeremy go.

            “Fine, but don’t say I didn’t warn you!” He said, stalking off towards Rich and Jake’s dance circle. Jeremy smiled and shook his head at his husband’s exasperation. He walked over to Abe and his dad.

            They stopped talking about Abe’s work and looked at Jeremy.

            “Do you mind if I talk to you for a minute?” he asked Abe. The man nodded and followed Jeremy to a more isolated area of the yard.

            “What’s up?” he asked curiously, crossing his arms.

            “Okay, I’m going to ask you something weird. Please don’t get pissed!” Jeremy said while raising his hands in front of him. Abe laughed.

            “Don’t worry Jeremy. I think we crossed that line years ago when you asked me if having hair down there was normal.” Jeremy blushed.

            “I thought we agreed NEVER to bring that up again!”

            “What do you want to ask me?” Abe said, getting back to the topic at hand.

            “Okay…do you like guys?” Jeremy asked nervously. Abe blinked.

            “Uh, yeah, I am a guy, I have guy friends, so I would say that yes, I like guys,” Abe replied, clearly amused. Jeremy rolled his eyes.

            “Ugh…I mean, do you have an interest in men? Like sexually?” Jeremy muttered. The man looked to the side for a minute, then focused back on Jeremy.

            “Is…it that obvious?” He quietly asked.

            “Uh, no. That’s why I asked,” Jeremy said. Abe looked relieved.

            “Please, don’t say anything to your dad. I can’t tell you to not tell Michael, but please don’t let any other family member know!” Abe asked in a rush. Jeremy looked at him sadly.

            “Uncle Isaiah is still like that huh?”

            “Yeah…,” Abe quietly said, looking down in shame. Jeremy’s uncle was the strictest in their family when it came to their Jewish faith. He also had a verbally abusive streak that was primarily directed at Abe, since he was the eldest. No matter what Abe did, or how much he succeeded, it was never good enough. If he found out about Abe, he would be banished from the family. It hadn’t affected Jeremy too much since he never saw his other relatives outside of holidays and other mandatory ceremonies. Abe was different. He knew everyone in their family and had been forced to adhere to every little Jewish custom. Jeremy couldn’t help but feel bad for him.

            “Gay? Bi? Pan?” Jeremy asked quietly. There were others, but Abe got the gist of the question.

            “Gay. I’ve only been interested in men,” Abe replied in a hushed tone.

            “I see. I’m glad you told me,” Jeremy said. Abe smiled in response. “I’m about to tell you something, but I’m not trying to force you into anything,” Jeremy said, suddenly remembering the reason he was talking to his cousin about this. Abe nodded.

            “Y’know Dustin, the guy you saw earlier?” Abe nodded, clearly not understanding what was going on. “I think he is into you, like really into you. I’ve never seen him freak out that much before over a guy!” Jeremy said. Abe’s dark brows rose up in surprise. He looked over at Dustin, who was currently talking to Christine by the buffet table.

            “He’s…y’know?” Abe asked, turning back to Jeremy. Jeremy nodded.

            “Yeah. Our group knows, but no one else does. His family is super strict.”

            “I can relate to that,” Abe said, looking over at Dustin again with interest. Jeremy smiled.

            “I don’t want to pressure you or anything, but I think it would be worth looking in to, if you want to that is,” Jeremy said. Abe nodded absentmindedly, still looking across the yard at Dustin. “I’m going to go look for Michael, he isn’t too happy that I’m meddling right now.”

            Jeremy hesitated. “And don’t worry, I didn’t tell him your full name, Abraham Isaiah Obadiah Heere!” Jeremy laughed, and ran as soon as Abe looked at him furiously. He hated his name with a passion. Jeremy had gotten off easy on the Jewish name game.

He ran off in search of his husband. Jeremy still felt giddy at the thought that he was _married_ to Michael. His _husband_. He smiled as walked up to the dance circle. Rich was dancing some sort of tango with one of Michael’s grandmothers, while Jake was showing Michael’s older brother how to brink dance. He caught sight of Michael taking a video of the tango from the other side of the circle.

            "Sige lola! Pakitaan mo 'yan!" he yelled over towards the dancing duo in Tagalog. Jeremy walked over to him and snaked an arm around his waist. He turned and smiled at Jeremy.

            “Have fun matchmaking?” he asked.

            “Yeah, I’m hoping something will come of it,” Jeremy replied. They smiled at one another, leaning in to kiss when Jeremy felt a yank on his arm. He stumbled away from Michael, who opened his eyes in concern. Jeremy turned to look down at Christine with an irritated look.

            “Don’t give me that look Jeremiah Heere! It’s time for the bouquet toss!”

            Michael followed after them as Maria announced the event to come. The crowd followed them to the backyard deck, where Michael and Jeremy were taking the steps up to the top.

            All of the non-married people grouped behind the newlyweds. Among them were all of their friends, except Chloe, who stood off to the side uninterested. And Rich and Jake, who looked at the group of women with amusement. Chloe’s girlfriend, on the other hand, was dead in the center of the crowd hopping up and down excitedly with Christine and Jenna.

            Maria handed them a bouquet filled with a variety of colorful flowers. They smelled wonderful. Michael and Jeremy held them together and turned from the waiting crowd. On the count of three they tossed them over their heads. There were shouts of excitement behind them, that quickly turned into shrieks of anger.

            They turned around to see all the women glaring at Rich and Jake. Rich had the bouquet in his hands, laughing uncontrollably. Christine and Jenna were yelling various insults at them while Brooke looked like she was about to cry. Chloe walked up to the front of the group with her hands on her hips.

            “What the hell is wrong with you two!?” she yelled.

            “Hey! Don’t get mad just because we caught the bouquet before you ladies did!” Rich said, smelling the flowers. Chloe’s eye twitched.

            “You jumped off Jake’s back and took it out of the air before we even got a chance you assholes!” she screeched. Cries of protest erupted behind her.

            Both boys looked at each other and took off in opposite directions. Michael and Jeremy’s female cousins looked at the retreating two with varying degrees of disappointment. The squad girls, on the other hand, ran after them. Christine caught up to Jake and jumped on his back, hitting him on the shoulders repeatedly while he tried to shake her off. Jenna caught up to him, and knocked him down to hit his back with her purse while Christine beat him with her fists. The whole time he was laughing hysterically, clearly not being injured in any way.

            Meanwhile, Chloe and Brooke were running after Rich and the bouquet. He jumped over the buffet table and hopped over multiple chairs while the girls persistently followed him. He was finally stopped when Abe and Dustin, who had been talking rather closely (much to Jeremy’s excitement), tackled him, both wearing identical grins while Rich cursed between them. The girls made it over to them and began to beat him with their purses, confiscating the bouquet in the process.

            “You damn hobgoblin!” Chloe yelled as she resumed her onslaught. Brooke was too busy panting from the exertion to say anything. Rich began to laugh as Dustin tickled his under arms while Abe held him down.

            “You really shouldn’t get on the wrong side of women Rich!” Dustin said as he continued tickling him.

            “Yeah, it’s not good for your health in the long run man!” Abe supplied, chuckling.

            Jeremy looked over at Michael, who was bent over laughing at the scene before them. Jeremy felt tears accumulating in his eyes as he laughed with him.

            He really loved his friends.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

            After the bouquet incident, the boys walked to Michael’s PT Cruiser. The car had ‘Just Married’ written on the back of the car with cans tied to the bumper. Their friends and relatives walked behind them to the driveway.

            They weren’t going on a honeymoon in the traditional sense. Jeremy’s dad had come through again and paid for them to spend the night at an expensive hotel. They were both really appreciative.

            They both hugged their parents and waved goodbye to their friends before heading into the car. Driving away, Jeremy looked in the rearview mirror and smiled at the people who had shaped his life in so many different ways.

            He looked over at his husband, who was still waving at the people behind them. It had been just them for a long time. Then it had gone from two to eight, then from eight to nine when Dustin came along, and now he guesses ten with the addition of Abe. Jeremy felt that he was going to start seeing his cousin more often from now on.

            The group had gotten bigger, but the two of them would always have a special relationship, especially now. They had gone through a lot together, and most likely would in the future too. For once, Jeremy was going to look on the bright side. They would get through anything that life threw at them together.

            Grasping Michael’s hand in his, Jeremy leaned over and kissed his husband’s cheek. Michael smiled and kissed him back.

            After all, life was a two-player game.

 

 

 

 

 

_aking anak- my son_

_*Sige lola! Pakitaan mo 'yan!- Go grandma! Show him how it is done!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was so much fun to write! Thanks everyone who has been keeping up with the story and for the kudos and comments! I love reading the positive responses the story has received. I will more than likely write a side story related to IHHMILY that is in Michael's POV. Thanks again for the support! :D
> 
> P.S. I was not trying to make fun of Jewish names or their culture! There are a lot of interesting, hard to pronounce names in the Bible. I just took some out of it and added it to Abe's name for funsies. His mom likes biblical names, she just got a tad out of hand naming her first born. 
> 
> P.S.S. I attempted Tagalog, which I know absolutely nothing about! I typed the English version through a translator and this is what came out! Sorry if it isn't correct, I tried!

**Author's Note:**

> Christine is the best! I have honestly never tried hot tea before, Christine just seems like someone who would love it to me. The next chapter introduces Jeremy's POV. I have other chapters posted on my tumblr, thefantasyqueen.


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